Should I Hire a Dating Coach? Here’s 13 Reasons Why

why you should hire a dating coach

Want to crush your dating goals, increase your confidence and ultimately meet the girl of your dreams?

Instead of sitting back and praying Cupid still has great aim with that ancient bow of his, use your own bow and arrow to find love. Of course, it helps if you have a coach to teach you how to shoot.

Hi guys, Emyli here — your dating coach for men. During my 100-date experiment, I learned a lot about the intricacies of the dating scene. Through the use of key strategies, trial-and-error, and plenty of practice, I became an expert in the dating world. I found a compatible, long-term partner during my experiment, and became a professional dating coach to help others find the same type of success!

So why should you hire a dating coach? It gives you support that is laser-focused on your specific needs, goals, and personality so that you can find lasting love and never worry about romantic dissatisfaction again.

Top Reasons to Hire a Dating Coach

#1: It Keeps You Focused and on Track

Just like a fitness, nutrition, or career coach would, a dating coach will help build a pathway to success and make sure you stay on pace to achieve your goals. A dating coach will make help you define success and then help you achieve it.

Gone are the days of wishing your way into a relationship. With a dating coach by your side, you leave nothing to chance. Instead, we’ll help you create your own luck by teaching you the skills you need to dine and wine any woman.

When you hire a dating coach, the coach will keep all your goals in order and help you track them. This will allow you to reach your desired outcomes much faster.

At emlovz, dating is a science.

#2: A Dating Coach Holds You Accountable

You don’t have to rely on your willpower as the sole source when it comes to continually putting yourself out there in the dating world. A dating coach holds you accountable, and accountability is a big predictor of success.

Accountability can help you reach your goals in various aspects of your life. According to a study published in the Journal of Social Sciences, people who participated in exercises with other motivated people tended to have better results, as they tended to replicate the behaviors around them.

Another study published in the journal Obesity found that overweight people tended to lose more weight when spending time with their fit friends.

When you spend time working with a dating coach like me, you’re getting a perspective from someone who has already found success in the dating world and is currently in a long-term relationship. Getting advice from someone who has already achieved the thing you’re seeking is super important because they’ve already proven they have the skills and learned the lessons to achieve that goal.

#3: A Dating Coach Will Help Get You to Your Goals Faster

getting to your dating goals

Dating coaches can help you reach your dating goals faster than you could imagine.

When you hire a dating coach, you have the benefit of getting an outside perspective from a seasoned professional.

A dating coach will assess your situation, help you create goals, and work with you on an action plan to ensure that you achieve those goals. And, trust me, your dating coach wants to see you crush your goals.

As a dating coach, the success of a client is also a reflection of how successfully you’re running your business. Plus, dating coaches like me have been through the highs and lows of dating, which creates empathy toward other people who want help in the dating world.

#4: You’ll Get Support When Dating Gets Rough

Dating isn’t meant to feel like a job interview or a chore. Unfortunately, for many singles out there, entering the dating world is a task they take on begrudgingly. Dating can seem like a place of anxiety and frustration for many people.

But with a dating coach, you will have the benefit of seeing the dating world through an entirely different lens. And — after years of experience and seeing tons of success stories — I can promise you that dating truly can be fun. Lots of fun, in fact!

But that doesn’t mean that there won’t be hiccups or bad dates on the road to finding an awesome girlfriend.

If you have a bad date, end up feeling awkward, or something goes awry, a dating coach will be there to offer you support. Together, you and a coach can use whatever went wrong to guide you toward a more successful path. Mistakes are actually important in achieving goals because they teach you what to do differently next time.

Instead of falling into a spiral of worry, you can get support from your dating coach and get back into the game with confidence and a positive attitude.

We boast one of the, if not the most supportive dating program. 

We provide support in a few ways:

  • All-male online community of guys just like you who are on the same journey you’re on
  • Accountability buddies who will provide you with the support you need whenever you need it
  • Various online coaches who you’ll interact with at least twice a week during live sessions
  • Man Cave – a once-a-month event for men to come together and talk about whatever is on their minds
  • We have students in every city. Often students will meet up in person to bond, support one another, and even meet women

#5: It Helps You Understand What Women Are Thinking

what women are thinking

I get it, sometimes understanding what women want is like trying to solve a 10,000-piece jigsaw puzzle that’s missing a few pieces.

When you hire a female dating coach like me, you will get a firsthand look at what a woman wants, what she is thinking, and why women do the things they do.

In fact, all our coaches with the exception of our coach and co-founder Thomas Anthony are women.

What better way to understand women than by being coached by them? We have insider information that male coaches just don’t.

#6: It Makes You More Competitive

When you have a coach who has goals laid out for you and is holding you accountable, you become competitive with yourself.

It’s great to have an action plan because we all inherently love winning and crossing a proverbial finish line. And in this case, your win will be experiencing more confidence in the dating world, getting more matches with online dating apps like Bumble and Hinge, and ultimately finding a high-quality girlfriend. I’ll show you how to use a variety of free dating sites and apps, get more swipe rights, get more responses from women, and close more first, second, and third dates.

At emlovz we have an entire portion of our program dedicated to creating online dating profiles worthy of swipes right.

We all know that apps like Tinder and Bumble are heavily dominated by men. When Tinder has a male-to-female ratio of 9 to 1 it’s difficult to stand out.

We have a track record of helping our students create profiles that outperform 90% of men in the area.

Team up with us to learn the tips and tricks of the trade.

#7: You Won’t Make the Same Mistakes as Everyone Else

using a dating coach

Having a dating coach gives you a major edge over the competition. A dating coach has vast experience with the trial-and-error aspects of dating, has seen what works and what doesn’t, and has a shrewd knowledge about how to avoid common and subtle mistakes.

By preventing mistakes before they happen, you won’t have to deal with the frustrations that many other singles encounter so that you can stress less and have fun while dating.

For example, some men create amazing profiles, know they’re good-looking, and score matches but never seem to receive responses on dating apps – why is that?

Too many guys refuse to invest in an opening message. 

They’ll say hey or a variation and are surprised when she doesn’t message back.

We’ll teach you how to send messages that are guaranteed to receive a response.

#8: You’ll Get a 360-degree Perspective

A dating coach won’t look at one or a few different angles of the problem when it comes to your dating life. You’ll see things from every single angle with an in-depth 360-degree perspective on:

  • Your dating history
  • Your habits
  • Your goals
  • Past relationships
  • Your personal health and wellness
  • Daily activity

These (among other things) will be looked at in depth in order to see how each aspect of your life has been fueling your dating habits. We’ll keep the good and eliminate the bad by reorganizing negative thinking and working to change habits that are impacting your overall well-being.

#9: Proven Success

dating coach for men hire one

You’ll know that you’re in good hands when it comes to hiring a dating coach like me because my methods have proven to be successful. You can check out some testimonials from previous clients at the bottom of the EmLovz homepage. Here are just a few success stories:

  • One client got married in one year after using my services.
  • Another client got 10 times the amount of dates he was getting before seeking my dating services.
  • Another client was receiving zero messages on dating apps and websites. After seeking my services, he received so many messages that he had to start turning down women because of the sheer volume of messages he was receiving.

hiring a dating coach

#10: A Dating Coach Points Out Blind Spots

Sometimes the issues you are having with dating may seem obvious, while others are a lot more surprising and subtle.

Remember that men and women are different, and things that you may think are irrelevant could actually be a big deal to the women you are hoping to date.

A dating coach makes you aware of the nuances that come with the dating process so that you won’t unknowingly hurt your chances with different women.

#11: Frees Up Time

You’re a very busy person.

You have a demanding career and at the end of the day the last thing you want to do is go looking online for someone to date. You need to strategize with a coach to structure your limited time on dating sites and apps.

High-quality dating coaches know how to optimize your online game. No more swiping away into the abyss. Instead, you’ll have a plan of attack that saves you time and helps you score more matches.

hiring a dating coach

#12: Learn What You’re Looking For

How do you know where you’re going if you don’t have a destination?

Dating without a plan means you’ll still be dating, but without intent. Do you want a LTR, something short-term, do you want an open relationship, etc.? Do you even know the type of woman you’re into?

MegaDating paired with sitting down and really figuring out what you want will expedite your dating process. It’s like a shortcut or entering the cheat codes to quickly get what you want.

So who has the cheat codes… emlovz.

#13: We Offer A Chance To Practice What You Learn

At emlovz we offer students a few learning pathways.

One is via our online curriculum that is self-paced and covers every dating topic imaginable to get you ready for the big date.

Secondly, we have two weekly live strategy sessions led by founder Emyli Lovz. It’s here that students can ask questions with our coaches providing detailed answers.

But what really sets us apart is a chance for students to practice what they learn in a low-stakes environment. 

Our two mock date specialists, Audrey and Brooke.

These mock dates go down just like any other date. The big difference is that when the date’s over you’ll receive detailed feedback on how you performed. Haven’t you always wanted an honest response from a date on how it went? Here’s your chance. You’ll receive feedback on what worked and what areas of your dating skills need improving.

This is the best hands-on way to improve your dating skills.

matchmaker vs dating coach

Should I Work With A Dating Coach Near Me?

When considering hiring a dating coach, this is no doubt a question you’ll ask.

Naturally, you’d think hiring a local dating coach is the way to go. But the world has changed. You no longer need to limit yourself to local coaches. Chances are you won’t even meet them IRL if they are local, so what’s the point?

You’re no longer limited to the one or two coaches in your area. Instead, you can choose the best dating coach in the entire country.

There are a bunch of benefits to teaming up with a non-local coach

Here are just a few.

Choose a Dating Coach Who is Well Rounded

As I mentioned earlier, you want to find a dating coach with experience. If you limit your search to dating coaches in your city, they might not be properly qualified to help you. They should be able to:

  • Diagnose your dating struggles
  • Help you construct online dating profiles that get matches
  • Show you how to craft compelling messages on dating sites that get responses and dates
  • Help you set up a perfect first date that saves you time and money
  • Deliver ideas for physical second date ideas that escalate the relationship
  • Teach you text message strategies and how to follow up properly after your dates
  • Have a strategy that makes them unique. Mine is MegaDating

Do your research.

Check reviews, talk to students, learn their dating philosophy, and of course meet them prior to enrolling to ensure you two hit it off.

You Should Find a Dating Coach Who Has What You Want

If you were wanting to hire a financial advisor, would you hire one with a low balance in their bank account?

Of course not!

You’d want to hire someone who really knows what they’re doing with money, right? And if they can’t do it for themselves, how can they do it for you?

The same is true for a dating coach. It’s best to find someone who has been through it and has had success. Not only that, but make sure you get a feeling that they are currently working with a handful of clients. You want to know that your dating coach has potentially solved the issue you’re struggling with for a previous client of theirs.

Also, it’s the 21st century. Make sure the dating coach you select is heavily versed in online dating sites and apps. As most relationships start online, it’s in your best interest to team up with someone that knows the ways of online dating.

best lexington dating coach

Ask your coach a variety of qualifying questions. If you’re seeking a long term girlfriend, wouldn’t it make sense to find out if the coach you’re about to hire is in a long-term relationship?

No More Commute

We have all become accustomed to getting our business done online. 

Without leaving the comfort of our home we can get our work done, chat up lovely single ladies online, and now attend dating classes with your new dating coach.

Local coaches may require or at least want you to meet in person. But who wants to drive 30-45 minutes anymore to meet up with someone they can just chat with online anyways?

Let’s Get Started

Don’t wait for love to find you — take action. To try out my services, head over to my calendar page and book a 1-on-1 new client Zoom session with me today.

During our intro session, we’ll address your dating roadblocks, create an action plan, and determine if my coaching program is right for you.

I look forward to working with you and helping your dating dreams become a reality.

And if you’d like to know what our students are saying about us, just check out our reviews.

What To Text Her After the First Date Including Examples

What to text her after the first date

While I understand you’ve arrived on this article because you want to know what to text her after the first date, the majority of what I’m about to tell you is why you actually shouldn’t. Texting between dates is dicey.

Too much communication, especially thoughtless, superficial messages (like the below examples) have the unintended consequence of sabotaging sexual attraction.

Example of a bad text after the first dateBad text to send a woman because it's basic AFWeak text message example to send a woman

If you’re repeatedly seeing text message conversations with women fizzle out, then you might be killing your mystery by over-communicating. Below are some strategies you can use to avoid smothering that initial spark.

What to Text Her After the First Date: 10 Strategies

#1: Close for the Second Date While You’re Still On the First Date

When you close for the second date while you’re still with her on the first date, it helps you to avoid texting in between dates.

Too much texting kills mystery, which is the foundation for sexual tension. If you text her a lot in between dates, she’ll begin feeling as though there’s nothing more to talk about and she won’t want to meet you for a second date (she may even flake on the date).

Frequent texting between dates makes it increasingly likely that she’ll flake on your next rendezvous or ghost you completely. If you failed to close for the second date while on the first date, then I’d recommend picking up the phone and calling her.

Having the courage to call a woman rather than texting her, demonstrates leadership, and it’s masculine and sexy. If she doesn’t answer, leave the following voicemail:

What to say on a voice message when you call her

And you’re done. Don’t overshare by telling her the reason for your call. The mystery you create by being intentionally vague and succinct elicits curiosity, imagination, and sexual tension.

Even if she doesn’t return the call, and opts to text you back instead, you still get points for having the courage to pick up the phone.

Doing this will set you apart from 99% of men who are too afraid to call. I know it’s scary but with high risk, comes high reward.

#2 Strategy for What To Text Her After the First Date: Message With Intent

If you have to text her, make sure you do so with the intent of getting on a date. When I review my clients’ messages during our weekly group calls, the most common problem I see is a lack of intent. Every message you send, whether it’s on a dating app or text message, should always and only have the intention of getting on the date.

In almost every coaching session, I find myself asking my clients, “what was the intent behind that message?” If their response is anything other than “to get on a date,” I remind them that their lack of intent is why they did not receive a response.

For example, there is no intent behind these two text messages:

Bad example of a text message after a first date

Message that you should not send after a first date

Messaging without intent is guaranteed to lose your audience’s attention, which leads to being ghosted. You’ll also get ghosted when you message without intent because it makes it difficult for a woman to respond.

If she doesn’t know what to say, she won’t respond, and you’ll destroy your chances of getting on that next date.

#3: Quit Texting And Call

I touched on this earlier, but it’s always better to call than to text. So much gets lost in translation over text because you can’t hear a person’s tone of voice, pitch, pacing, or inflection. Without these communication signals, it becomes difficult and often impossible to fully understand what someone means.

Pick up your phone and use it for what it was meant for — phone calls. Keep your call short and sweet. And only call with the intent of setting up the date.

There is no need to keep in touch with her between dates unless some weird situation is at hand like she’s going to Africa for three months and you won’t see her until she gets back.

Other than that, it’s fine to let the silence between you breed mystery. After all, mystery is the primary driver behind sexual tension. If you don’t want to get friend-zoned, quit trying to communicate with her ad nauseam.

Strategy #4: Give Her Space To Wonder About You

Don’t text her immediately following your date. I had a guy do this that I liked and it took me from 100% interested to 0% in the space of 2 seconds. You want to give her space to process the date you just had.

Allow her room to think about you, get curious about you, and then fill in the blanks in her mind using her imagination. When you give her space to wonder about you, her imagination will lead her into fantasyland, where you become a prince on a pedestal.

However, if you fill the silence with trivial text conversation, she’ll lose the space in her mind allotted for imagining you as prince charming.

#5 Strategy for Texting Her After The First Date

When your first date is complete, never text her to say how perfect or beautiful she was. Give her a little time to digest the date and consider how she feels about you.

Remember to always message with the intent of getting on the next date. Pretend like you’ve got a flip phone from 1996 and it doesn’t have text messaging features on it.

You’ll also want to avoid basic questions like:

Thoughtless text messages to send women after a date

In addition, you never want to call a woman out when she doesn’t respond to you. Here’s a couple of examples: Don't call out bad behavior in your text message after a dateWhat not to text her after a first date

 

If she hasn’t responded or she did something that bothers you, don’t mention it. You catch more bees with honey, and that’s especially true in texting.

That said, don’t reward her lack of response urgency by being a doormat. The caveat here is if you can call her out in a funny, playful way. A way that shows your value. A way that shows her you don’t take yourself too seriously. This guy did a great job:Funny text after a first date when she ghosts

This message shows me that this man isn’t overly sensitive, stuffy, or clingy. All woman want a guy who can make light of things that would piss most people off. Demonstrating a sense of humor, especially in the face of rejection, is always charming.

#6: Use A Re-Engagement Line

If you think she’s ignoring you after the first date, re-engage her with a message that uses her name and incites an emotional response.

For example, let’s say you’ve tried TDLing her twice and she hasn’t responded. Yet you know she was responsive earlier in the conversation.

Try this:

Re-engagement text when she doesn't respond

Or you could say something like:

Then wait for her to respond (up to 48 hours and then if she doesn’t send a follow-up message).funny text to send when she doesn't respond

Wait for her to respond, but if she doesn’t within 2 hours try…

follow up text to send when she doesn't respond

While this message won’t guarantee a response, using her name is far more likely to re-engage her. Everyone’s favorite word is their name.

A person’s name is the most powerful word you can use to capture attention and compel a response. If you’ve lost her, use a last-ditch message with her name to give yourself the best opportunity for a response.

#7: If You Had Good Chemistry and Excellent Trust and Rapport

Let’s say you were already smoochin’ on the first date and there was a ton of trust and rapport right off the bat. Then, and only then would I send a flirty text to boost sexual tension before the second date.

Usually, I’d recommend saving the racy texts until after the second date, but if things went insanely well on the first date, you could try using one of the following messages to boost the sexual tension.

Sexy text to send after a good dateSexy text example

If you’re feeling particularly brave, you could try one of these:

Flirty text message to send a womanSexy message to send a woman

Once she responds, you could follow up with:

Follow up message

Again, use these messages strategically, and only after you’ve built a solid foundation of trust and rapport. Otherwise, they may be too suggestive for your current relationship phase.

#8 Strategy for What To Text After The First Date: If You’re Not Interested

I always recommend following the golden rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” What this means for me is, if I don’t like someone, then I don’t reach back out. I, personally, see no use in sending an unsolicited rejection message. Chances are if I wasn’t feeling them, then they weren’t feeling me either.

What I would suggest is that you practice not saying something you don’t mean, like, “I’ll call you,” or “I’ll be in touch.”

My favorite college professor taught me to always “Say what you mean and mean what you say.” Powerful words to live by, especially in dating. If you don’t feel good about ghosting her, then consider how you would want to be rejected, and say that.

Acknowledge how it would feel if the tables were turned. At the same time, try not to be overly naive. Chances are that if you don’t want to see her again, she probably doesn’t want to see you again either. It’s not worth forcing something that doesn’t feel good. You honestly might just want to let it go and fade out.

#9: Who Should Reach Out First?

You should. As the man, you’re the hunter. She wants you to pursue her, and ultimately, I bet you do too.

Don’t be like 99% of men by sending a text message. Follow this strategy if you didn’t close for the second date while on the first date:

  1. Plan out a compelling second date, if you haven’t already closed for it on the first date.
  2. When you’re three days out from this epic date idea, call her up and pitch her on the idea.

On the flip side, if you closed for the second date while on the first, then just give her a call the day before to confirm.

If you closed for the second date weeks in advance, then call her 3 days before to confirm and give her logistical information she’ll need in order to meet you.

#10: How Long Should You Wait To Text Her?

You should only reach out when you’re ready to invite her on a date. If you’ve already done that while on the first date, then all you need to do is confirm the date the day beforehand, assuming there’s not a long gap in time between dates.

If there is, just call her three days before with information about the upcoming date.

Conclusion

And now you know exactly what to text her after the first date including examples you can use right away. Remember that, whenever you can, it’s important to close for the second date while you’re still with her on the first date.

Additionally, when messaging, always and only message with intent, but if you can avoid it, I highly recommend that you call her rather than texting back and forth.

And once you’ve completed that magical first date, give her the space she needs to get curious about you. Don’t forget to avoid the common mistakes most men make in texting after the first date.

Examples include calling her out for not replying to your message, sending a message with zero intent, or telling her how perfect she is.

If she stops responding, try a re-engagement line that utilizes her first name.

Pro-tip: Everyone’s favorite word is their own name. Avoid sending racy texts after a first date unless you have mind-blowing chemistry, trust, and rapport. If you do all that, I’m confident you’ll get ghosted less and go on second dates more.

Dating Decoded

If you’re still having trouble grasping these concepts, there’s hope. I work with men every day who are struggling with what to say to a woman after a first date.

There are a few ways we teach men messaging strategy.

Our online curriculum is full of granular lessons that walk you through the art of chatting a woman up online. Whether that be sliding into her DMs, chatting her up via Tinder, or asking her out on a second date via text. 

We also tackle this obstacle via live strategy sessions.

Twice a week we offer students the chance to review their messages live. During coaching calls students have the chance to present messages they’ve sent or will send so they can be reviewed by coaches. During this sessions we’ll break down what is and isn’t working and will then help you press the send button. We realize that dating is dynamic and every interaction has its own unique set of nuances, that’s why we use such a custom approach to messaging.

But hey, if you can’t wait for our coaching session, post your message on our private community.

Here students and coaches alike will have the chance to read and help you refine your messaging strategy. We offer real-time support between 9-6 PST, Monday through Friday.

Dating Decoded offers lifetime message reviews as well as lifetime membership.

You can book a new client session with me here to chat more about your unique situation and get actionable advice unique to your situation.

If you want to know what our students think of our program, just check out these testimonials or the reviews below.