Day: November 27, 2023

An Extensive Coffee Meets Bagel Review (Plus How it Works for Guys)

Have you heard of Coffee Meets Bagel?

Despite its growing popularity, you may not be as familiar with the dating app if you’re a guy.

And guess what?

That’s just how the founders wanted it. But don’t worry, this Coffee Meets Bagel review will break down everything you need to know about the app so that you can use it successfully.

The Coffee Meets Bagel Story

Before I launch fully into my Coffee Meets Bagel review, a bit of exposition…

Coffee Meets Bagel was developed by three hopelessly single sisters, all based in New York City at the time. During their research, the three sisters found that there was a huge imbalance in the number of men using dating apps compared to women. So they decided to launch something aimed exclusively at relationship-oriented women who were:

Sick of being single
Tired of creepy guys messaging them
Interested in something that would “even the ratio” of men to women when it came to apps
Looking for quality guys

The entrepreneurs moved to San Francisco — home of the best of the best when it comes to engineers — and watched their vision come to fruition.

How to Download the App

Coffee Meets Bagel is available for both iPhone and Android users. Simply go to the app store, type in “Coffee Meets Bagel” and download.

Voila! Now you can get set up.

Setting Up Your Profile

Setting up your profile takes a few minutes.

You’ll be prompted to answer basic questions about your age, dating preferences, height, work, etc.

From there it’s time to fill out your profile.

Select Your Best Photos

Using your Facebook photos or camera roll, pick the best picture possible to impress the ladies. Regardless of the app or dating site you use, you should always select the most attractive pics possible. If you’re struggling to take quality photos, learn how to pose for dating app photos.

CMB allows users to choose up to 9 photos (more than any other dating app I know of). Take this opportunity to put your personality on full display.

Women tend to be selective on dating profiles and apps, but this app is designed to make women especially selective. Later in this Coffee Meets Bagel review, I will expand on this.

Fill Out Your Profile

There are a variety of sections on your profile that you can easily fill out. I recommend that you fill each section out honestly and accurately.

The app prompts you to fill out the basics (remember, DON’T LIE!):

Height
Ethnicity
Religion
Occupation
Employer
Education

From there, it’s a bit unique. Many dating apps like Tinder simply give you space to write a quick bio. But with Coffee Meets Bagel, you have the chance to answer various prompts such as:

So…What Are Bagels & How Does Coffee Meets Bagel Work for Guys?

Bagels are a high-carb food, primarily eaten during breakfast time and pair well with things like cream cheese.

Oh, you mean as far as the app goes? MY BAD!

Bagels are the term used to refer to your matches. The ladies who started the app decided to name it Coffee Meets Bagel because:

Coffee is a great first date idea
Bagels are an homage to New York City, where they first thought up the app

Each day at noon, men receive 21 bagels that they can like or pass on. At the same time, women are shown the men who liked them and they can choose to complete the match or pass.

By preventing messaging to start until the woman decides she thinks it’s a good match, the app provides a “Ladies Choice” mentality.

The app has an algorithm that is designed to match people who are most compatible, who are of the highest quality, and who are more likely to want long-term relationships.

Limited Time

While creating this Coffee Meets Bagel review, one thing that I wanted to be sure to mention as a pro is how the app encourages people to make moves — and fast.

Both you and your bagel have up to 24 hours to like each other or pass. If you both hit like, you can start chatting.

And it takes initiative a step further by only allowing you to chat for seven days before someone (YOU) decides to create a date plan and take the conversation from online to offline.

In other words, Coffee Meets Bagel encourages their users to go out on actual dates.

I LOVE this.

On other apps, awkwardness and/or an excess of messaging can lead to things like serendipidating, where conversations with matches eventually devolve into nothing and the two of you never meet up.

By issuing a deadline and also offering a select amount of bagels you can match with, Coffee Meets Bagel makes it way more likely that your matches will turn into actual dates.

What Are Beans?

Let’s say that you’ve gotten busy and haven’t logged onto the app for a while. You had a great match but the conversation expired.

You still have 30 days to reopen the chat if you use Coffee Meets Bagel’s unique currency — beans.

When you’re a guy, beans are especially important. Each user starts off with 385 beans. There is a “Discovery” section in Coffee Meets Bagel that allows you to see extra bagels outside of your preselected batch that is delivered to your profile at noon each day.

Women can see select bagels without spending a single bean. But, if you’re a guy, you’re going to have to shell out 380 beans (YIKES) if you see a bagel that could be your everything — an everything bagel if you will.

You can accrue beans through everyday things, like matching and conversation, but they are also available for purchase:

100 for $1.99
2,000 for $23.99
3,000 for $24.99

Depending on your finances, it may or may not be a good option to shell out some cash for extra beans, particularly when you see a bagel you want to match with via the Discovery tab.

When our dating app researcher recently tested out this app, he discovered it was quite difficult to rack up free beans over a short period of time. The app is setup for you to eventually break and buy some beans.

If your budget is tight, I’d recommend downloading a variety of dating apps, and use their “free” version. This will limit the amount of women you can connect with, but if you are low on cash this strategy can work.

HACK: You can score 200 free beans by following CMB.

Premium Memberships

Coffee Meets Bagel offers everything you need to enjoy a successful dating app experience at no cost.

However, businesses need to make money, so of course, there are “premium options” available for a fee.

An upgraded Coffee Meets Bagel membership costs $20 per month.

Is It Worth It?

Your premium membership includes the following:

Unlimited suggested profiles instead of being sent a set number at noon
See who likes you
8 flowers a month that send your like to the top of the profile queue
1 boost a month to expose you to more users
Read receipts
Unlimited rewinds
Activity reports

If you’re rolling in dough, I say there’s no harm, no foul when it comes to upgrading your membership. But if you use my online dating strategies and present yourself in a way that is appealing, you can enjoy just as many awesome dates via this app without spending a dime.

All in all, I tend to advise my students to steer clear of whipping out their credit card when it comes to free dating apps and sites.

NOTE: A Mini membership is also available. This membership costs $3/week and offers limited features.

Coffee Meets Bagel Review: Pros

Overall, I really, really like this app.

It’s free, extremely user-friendly, and comes equipped with plenty of unique features that make it stand out from its competitors.

This is also a great app for relationship-oriented people. On apps like Tinder, you’re going to get a mixed bag of people who want a relationship and those who simply want to hook up.

Moreover, you don’t have to worry about suffering from dating app fatigue. Because the app offers a limited number of bagels each day, you can focus on a few people at a time instead.

I also like that this app is one of the few where there is a higher percentage of women than men. This allows women to be super selective. Men don’t have to worry about trying to elbow their way into a woman’s messages while competing with a bunch of creepers (who may make the woman cancel her account altogether) or throngs of other guys of ranging quality vying for a date.

When you check the Coffee Meets Bagel review via the app store, it boasts a high rating that lets you know its users are impressed.

One other thing I like about the app is its overall layout. There’s just something very clean, friendly and fun about it.

Coffee Meets Bagel Review: Cons

Although there are pros to having a select number of matches, there are also some cons.

With apps like Tinder, you get to swipe on as many people as you want from a large pool of singles. This can help you meet a lot more people at a faster rate if you play your cards right. For that reason, I advise keeping Coffee Meets Bagel as one of a few different apps you use while navigating the dating world – don’t solely rely on it.

Another drawback is that, despite its growing popularity, the app hasn’t reached as broad of an audience as its competitors, like Tinder, Match, and Bumble. Depending on where you live, your selection may be even more limited.

Make the Most of Coffee Meets Bagel

Whether it’s this app or any other type of online dating tool, your approach and personality are ultimately what’s going to help you turn online connections into real-world dates.

After you have grabbed a woman’s attention with a great opening line, it’s time to get her to agree to meet you for a date so you can see if there is actual chemistry between the two of you. You can do this by creating a compelling date plan that issues a clear TDL.

What is a TDL?

A TDL is an acronym that stands for:

Time: The time of day that a date will occur
Date: The day of the week that the date will take place
Location: Where specifically this date will occur

Girls constantly receive messages from guys who ask to “grab a drink” or “get a coffee” with no clear plan in mind. When you use a TDL, you stand out from those other guys by showing a girl that you are a good planner and are interested enough to think things through.

Use Coffee Meets Bagel While MegaDating

Remember how I said that Coffee Meets Bagel should be one of the many online dating tools you use? That’s because, in order to find a long-term compatible partner, you should never put all of your eggs into one basket.

Enter MegaDating.

MegaDating is the main dating strategy I used during my 100-date experiment. It led me to a long-term, fulfilling relationship and it can do the same for you!

So what is MegaDating? MegaDating is a dating process that involves going on dates with several different people at the same time in order to diffuse energy and keep your calendar full. When you MegaDate, you are able to crush your dating goals faster than ever before because:

Your confidence increases over time
You end up with less anxiety in the dating world because, after all, practice makes perfect
You avoid settling for mediocre women
Rejection is easier to deal with
It’s straight-up fun
You introduce yourself to a variety of different experiences, which ultimately help you understand what you really want in a partner

I’ve used my expertise to help several men learn the intricacies of MegaDating, the dating world (both online and offline), and what it takes to attract high-value women. I can do the same for you.

Ready to get started?

Meet Your Perfect Bagel

Interested in learning how we here at emlovz can help you find your perfect match?

We teach our students the shortcut to finding their ideal match by MegaDating. MegaDating is our dating philosophy and it shapes everything we teach here at emlovz. Simply put MegaDating is dating prolifically with the specific goal of going on 20 dates in 90 days. This will give you ample women to compare and contrast so you can refine not only your dating skills but also who your ideal partner is.

To teach you how to quickly find highly compatible women in just weeks and become the most eligible bachelor in town you’ll team up with romantic experts, each skilled in their own unique area to support you.

Our Team

Emyli (me), co-founder, curriculum developer, head coach, and I host two coaching sessions every week
Thomas, co-founder, and coach. He’ll lead the biweekly Man Cave event where men come together to talk dating, bond with one another, and support other single men
Cat, Brooke, and Audrey are mock date specialists. Go on a practice date with them (and receive feedback) before your next date
Hailey is your new stylist. She’s worked with celebs from every industry and is now about to raid your closet
Tilly is our holistic sex & intimacy coach. She’ll help you get the most out of your sex life so you and your partner are happier between the sheets
Aundrea is an award-winning fitness coach. Are you ready to eat right and build muscle?
Mia is our social media expert. Revamp your Facebook and Instagram profiles with her help and start meeting women online

Our Community

And look, we realize that the single life can be difficult. If accepted into our coaching program, Dating Decoded, you’d be joining a community of supportive men and coaches who are there to listen, support, and encourage you as you navigate the single life.

Our program offers every student a lifetime membership (as if you’ll need it) so the support won’t stop until you’ve found your ideal partner.

If you’re ready to find your forever partner, book a Zoom session with our team today. Together we’ll talk about your dating history, your goals and show you how our program, Dating Decoded, can help you find your ideal partner.

Learn how our students have already improved their dating lives.

What To Do When She Pulls Away From You In an Early Relationship

Well, this is weird.

You’ve gone on three dates thus far. To the park, to the skating rink, and to your bedroom — whoop whoop!

But despite your rapid success, something quite odd has happened.

After your most recent date, she pulled away.

Quite rightly, you’re taken aback.

There was no indication that she was about to pull away. You two had gone on kickass dates, smooched, and even made plans to see each other again.

But suddenly she’s turned down plans to meet up and seems to be waiting longer and longer to respond to your texts.

Look, we’re not going to speculate as to why she’s acting this way. It could be a myriad of reasons ranging from her dog having just died, to her phone not receiving messages. Our job isn’t to pinpoint exactly why she’s acting this way, it’s to create a plan for what to do when she pulls away from you.

Why Women Pull Away & What To Do About It

Communicate Your Feelings

Look, ignoring you for a few days or canceling plans isn’t a sign that the relationship is on the fritz.

When something important to us — especially a relationship — takes a negative turn we often feel as though it happened as a consequence of our own actions.

As a species, we really need to work on not being so egocentric.

Realize that she’s living a life as complex as your own. There are literally a million reasons she pulled back.

What’s important is not to give up or speculate from afar.

What is important is getting answers.

To do this you’ll have to reveal your cards and tell her how you’re feeling.

Chances are she’s distant for some reason that will blow over soon enough. You have the option of holding back and waiting out the emotional storm until it passes. But if a couple of weeks have passed and you have no idea why she’s so distant it’s time to have a chat.

Start off by simply asking her if everything is all right.

Never start a sensitive conversation by being the aggressor and placing blame on the other person. At the same time don’t act all ‘woe is me’ when you broach the conversation.

With a cool head, text her asking how she’s feeling and acknowledge that she’s been distant. This text alone opens the door and gives her the chance to not only express herself but also to give you the ax if that’s what she’s been waiting to do.

Ideally, you two talk in person, but this depends on how young the relationship is. If it’s just been a few dates, talk via text, if you two are in a relationship with a label, have it in person.

The case may be that she’s not ready to end things, but her feelings toward you are lukewarm. If this is the case, how she feels about you is much more complex than expected.

It’s this complexity that is difficult to convey via text. Texting conversations have a tendency to drag on forever, never really reaching any kind of meaningful end because the medium being used to express oneself is highly flawed.

Sure it may be a bit more emotionally taxing, but important conversations are meant to have face to face.

If you do talk in person, start the conversation by talking about how you’re feeling. Whenever you’re asking someone to have a difficult conversation, it’s best that you kick things off. Once you’ve opened up, they’ll follow your lead.

Be Honest With Yourself

She pulled away because of work, because her friend just moved into town, because she just started training for a marathon.

You can make up any reason you’d like, but what’s the truth?

Hopefully, she told you how she really feels when you sat down and spoke with her.

But it’s more than possible that she’s holding back. That she wants to avoid conflict at all costs and isn’t sure whether she wants to end the relationship or not. So sure she tells you she’s just tired, but tired of what? You know her better than I do and have read the signs.

Be curious and willing to trust your partner, but also be aware of when her excuses amount to evidence that she just doesn’t want to be with you but is too afraid to pull the trigger. The quicker you get out of this relationship the sooner you’ll be able to invest in a relationship with a woman that truly wants to be with you.

Anxious Attachment Style

It’s not all on her.

Ask yourself if your behavior had something to do with her romantic recoil.

Specifically ask yourself if you’re attachment style played a role in pushing her away.

An anxious attachment style can manifest itself early on in a relationship by way of inundating a romantic flame with messages. Just recently, I heard about a student of ours who would send the woman he just started dating 5-10 messages a day. These messages weren’t to plan a date or in response to a message she sent but were instead sent just to check up on her.

Imagine you receiving 5-10 checkup messages a day from a woman you only just started to date.

Reasonably you’d want to take a step back and reassess the situation.

If you feel you might have an unhealthy attachment style, take this quiz.

Identifying your attachment style is the first step towards rewiring your brain to become a healthier and more stable romantic partner.

MegaDate

What to do when she pulls away you ask? — MegaDate.

I admit it’s kind of a zen-like move.

Instead of directly focusing on the issue — your romantic interest pulling away — you’re indirectly addressing the issue.

To be clear, MegaDating is nothing more than dating around. By when I say dating around I want to be clear. I advise my clients to date multiple times a week even going so far as to stack dates.

Look most dudes are content to wait around for their dream woman to waltz into their lives, my clients aren’t. That’s why I create a dating blueprint designed to address their concerns in the most effective way I know how.

When you MD, you’re mining for dates. You’re tapping into all your social channels in order to find compatible women worth meeting in person.

MegaDating has three chief benefits.

For one, it cuts down the amount of time needed to find a woman worth your time. When you actively date, you’re living life on your own terms.

Secondly, it quickly sharpens your dating skills. Imagine if you went on three dates a week for a single month. My god, you’d be a freakin’ dating king. You’d know what kind of first dates work, what to say and not to say, how to use a TDL, when to touch her, where to touch her, when to kiss, how to escalate a relationship, etc. etc. Practice, practice, practice.

Lastly, it’s quite difficult to know which women aren’t worth your time if you’ve got nothing to compare them with. Imagine going to an Indian restaurant, ordering one thing, kind of liking it, and then ordering that same dish for the rest of your life. That’s what dating is when you’re not MegaDating. MD is like hitting up that restaurant thrice times a week and ordering something different every time.

When you date a plethora of women you see the wider picture. You see what kind of women are out there, what type of women are attracted to you, and most importantly which women you’re attracted to.

So will MegaDating help you when she pulls away?

Actually, yes.

The dudes that date one person at a time are prone to cling. They put all their eggs in one basket and then freak out when they don’t all hatch. MD will lessen the blow should she opt to end the relationship. Knowing that there are other women out will imbue you with the strength not to smother her. Should you bombard her with texts the second she backs away, she’s guaranteed to ditch you. MegaDating teaches you to play it cool.

And if there’s anything I’ve learned both as a woman and a dating coach, it’s that cool always gets the girl.

Harness the Rejection Energy to Improve Yourself

You never have more potential than when you experience rejection.

As crummy as it feels, it has the power to fuel total transformation if you let it.

Rather than getting super sad (although that’s cool for a temporary time period), harness the rejection energy to help improve your diet, workouts, wardrobe, dating profiles, social media presence, etc.

I used to harness rejection energy by thinking to myself, “I’ll show them” and then I’d channel it into my workouts (ex: I’d run longer and faster), or I’d make my diet super healthy. I’d pay a lot more attention to my social media profiles, in case they ever crept on in, which in turn, helped me attract other people who were a better fit for me.

I read more books and listened to more podcasts and YouTube videos to improve myself in various areas. I became obsessed with my own self-development because I changed the rejection from “I’m not enough” to “I’ll show them how amazing I am.”

Harness the energy and use it to alchemize your life.

Avoid the Stage-5 Clinger Vortex

If you expressed yourself by communicating your feelings and listening to theirs, then you’re done communicating.

No need to keep following up to see where her head’s at. I understand the desire to feel in control but let’s be honest — you’re not. The more you try to be, the more stage-5 clinger you’re going to go.

That energy repels all. I know, I’ve tried it repeatedly and it NEVER F-ING WORKS.

So take my advice and do as I say not as I’ve done and halt communication once you’ve honestly expressed your stance and learned where they stood. Your absence will help them to make their own decision whereas your continued communication will only push them away. Don’t go stage-5 clinger by trying to keep communicating when you’ve already said your peace. Your silence will give her space and time to think about what she wants. She might shift her energy and come back, and she might not, but being a clinger and hitting her up all the time, always fails, so quit it.

Invest your energy into new relationships, new people, and a new strategy.

Demonstrate Social Proof on Social Media

Social media is a lot of things.

It’s addicting, can make us depressed, can link up disparate people from across the world, and can also be used to make the women you’re dating more into you.

Leverage social media to demonstrate to her and others how valuable you truly are.

Post photos of you doing fun activities with friends. This demonstrates to her that you are popular, well-liked by others, and fun to be around. It shows her your life is “cool” and so are you.

Ask yourself, who does she want to be with? The guy that’s out and about living life or the dude whose major event of the week is Tuesday bowling with Gladys and the boys?

Giving her space while displaying your life’s highlights gives her the chance to creep on you on her own terms and helps her make decisions about whether she’d like to be a part of your life or not.

Worst case scenario, she doesn’t come around and you now have tons of social proof that the next w0man — who will be a better fit for you– can see and will make her super attracted to you. Social proof is incredibly powerful for building trust, credibility, and perceived value. Use it!

Timeboxing

If you’re MegaDating you have other dates lined up.

You don’t need to waste time and energy fretting over whether or not this woman is into you.

Put her out of your mind by offering her space.

Tell her that it seems like she doesn’t know what she wants. Ask if she wants space and time to figure things out. Tell her you can give her 2-4 weeks to figure herself out.

Some women call this a vision quest. This time away will allow her to think clearly.

Should she come back to you, you know it’s real and that she’s into you.

In the meantime, live your life, don’t think about her, and go back out there and date!

What Now?

Now it’s time to act.

Stop waiting around for her to make a decision for you. Instead, put yourself in the driver’s seat by putting the plan we just outlined into action.

Look, I totally understand that embracing change can be daunting. The romantic realm is often a lonely one, but it doesn’t have to be.

What if you had a dating coach to help guide the way?