Congrats, you’ve made it to date #3 with that special gal.

This is the time to make your move, as date #3 is the perfect moment for you to seal the deal – so you’d better be sure you know how to get her in the mood.

If you lose your chance on date #3, you’re on your way to the friendzone, and that is a place you definitely do not want to be (especially after two amazing dates!).

As a dating coach that’s conducted a 100-date experiment, I’ve discovered that Date #3 is a turning point in any early relationship and knowing how to get her in the mood decides the success of this date.

So how do you make sure you know how to get your date in the mood?

Use my proven tips below to get your date in the mood so you can close the deal and enjoy an excellent third date.

Ways To Get Her In The Mood

Make Sure Date #2 Was Physical

The best way to ensure an exceptional date #3 is to have successfully completed a physical activity together on the second date.

In other words, put in your work beforehand.

Going from 0-100 sounds great if you’re Drake, but if you’re trying to heat things up on a date, that’s not the best way to go about it. Ideally, the increase in sexual attraction is gradual. Trying to heat things up with a blow torch out of nowhere can be jarring and a massive turn-off. 

So what does a physical second date look like?

Here are some physical second-date ideas:

• Hiking
• Dancing
• Cooking class
• Frisbee
• Yoga
• Board/card games that get the heart pumping (think Egyptian Ratscrew not Monopoly)
• Jiu-jitsu
• Basketball
• Walking along the beach
• Kayaking
• Jogging
• Biking
• Ice cream + walk in the park

Here are two articles on physical second-date ideas that get you moving and 13 other second-date ideas that’ll knock her socks off.

So what’s so great about a physical second date?

This allows you to touch her a few days before you do the deed, thus warming her up to you and getting her in the mood for your date (and after-date activities). You can also check out my article on where to touch a girl to get her in the mood if you need further help with this topic. 

The more you two touch the more comfortable she’ll be around you in close quarters. Going from not touching her at all (even if these touches are neutral) to kissing her can be unexpected and even put her off.

Note: Second dates should ideally be free. This is because if you’re MegaDating you don’t have the time or money to go on multiple second dates every week.

Warm Her Up Before The Actual Date

This can be as simple as sending her a sweet text a couple of hours before date number three.

A sweet pre-date text helps to break the ice and calm her nerves, since date #3 usually means sex if everything goes well.

Sending 4 or 5 texts maximum to her on the day of the date is a great way to get her in the mood without going overboard. This allows you to flirt and build tension with her before the date.

Here’s an example of how to get her in the mood by texting:

Asking for a pre-date photo is a bold move but one you might be willing to make depending on your dynamic.

Every dynamic is different. I’ve noted that sex shouldn’t be out of the realm of possibilities on a third date but that all depends on your relationship. Don’t feel obligated to have sex on a third date.

However, you should desire (and try) to heat things up. Maybe that means giving her a goodnight smooch or just holding her hand. Whatever the case may be you should see a natural progression of sexual chemistry.

To be stagnant may move things back not forwards.

Dress The Part

When helping students create the ideal online dating profile I always tell them to add a GQ shot.

In other words something that looks like this…

You don’t need to dress to the nines but at least wear a collard shirt and nice leather shoes.

Remember to have your beard and hair looking sharp and don’t forget to spray a little cologne.

Saturday Night Fever

Another surefire way to get her in the mood is a Saturday night get-together.

If a woman accepts a third date with you, make sure you schedule it for a Saturday evening. There’s a much greater likelihood she’ll be in the mood during the evening. Plus, she’s most likely off work on Sunday, so she’ll be able to relax more knowing she can sleep in the next day. This rids your date of any worries of a rushed weekday morning.

My students always ask me how to get her in the mood without her knowing. Using tips like scheduling a third date on a Saturday evening is a great subliminal way to achieve this goal, and get one step closer to intimacy! 

Ideally, you’ll also want to schedule that date close-ish to your place. The worst thing you can do is have a super sexy date and then ask her back to your place only to then drive 30 minutes to your place.

Increase Touching Frequency

Slowly hug your date right when you meet her.

If you’ve kissed already, then kiss her right away when you meet her – even if it’s just a quick peck.

Make sure you reserve a booth at the restaurant. Sit next to her so you can more easily talk and touch her. I advise doing this for most dates especially if the restaurant or bar you’re in is loud. Shouting across a table isn’t sexy. DO NOT sit across from her, as this conveys a business feel, and no girl will get into the mood if they think they are on an interview. Get saucy and split a dessert with her – that always gets women in the mood. Chocolate sauce and whipped cream, anyone?

And of course be sure not to order something too heavy, too spicey, or too smelly (avoid fish).

Have A Dinner And Post Dinner Spot Picked Out Ahead Of Time

If your date is not sold on closing the deal with you at the end of dinner, take her to a preselected lounge for an after-hour drink. Make sure this place is close enough to where you two were beforehand AND has a sexy vibe.

Make sure to compliment her as you are walking her to the next space of the evening. An honest compliment is a proven way to get your date in the mood.

Be prepared for the nightcap. Have a bottle of alcohol at your house that has a story to go with it. This way during the date you can tell her all about this amazing exotic rum/vodka/whiskey/wine that you got to get her excited about it. Then naturally suggest she come up to try it for a night cap. That’s an effortless way to get her to agree to come with you to your place and get her in the mood fast. 

Make Sure Your House Is Cribs Clean

Remember MTV’s Cribs (which is actually still a thing)?

Were we ever introduced to a house that was dirty?

We never saw underwear on the floor, pizza boxes strewn about the house, or a visibly dirty house.

When she walks in she should feel as though the maid had just left.

Make your bed, wash dishes, get rid of bad smells, and do what must be done so she feels like she’s walking into a hotel. No one (read; adult woman) wants to get naked in a frat house.

Set The Mood With Tunes

No doubt you have an Alexa or Bluetooth-enabled stereo in your place.

I also don’t doubt you have a sexy playlist at the ready – if not Spotify has a million to choose from.

Play one the moment she walks in and certainly before either of you use the bathroom (btw make sure you light a candle in the bathroom or spray Poo-pourri).

Or you can her to request an artist. Allowing her to DJ will give her confidence and make her feel at ease. Everyone feels better when listening to their favorite tunes.

When in doubt just play Daniel Caesar.

Be Clear And Direct With Your Intentions

At the end of dinner or at the lounge, tell her what you want.

You can make a simple and sincere statement like, “I want to take you back to my place and spend some more time with you.” Then take a minute to be silent and see if she says yes. Make sure you are being direct, but not crass, and she’s bound to give you an honest answer. Being direct is a real turn-on and a great way to get your date in the mood fast. Nothing is sexier than a man who’s straightforward and knows what he wants.

If you two have already been smooching and things are already hot just tell her, “I’d love to kiss you in a more private place, want to come to my place?”

And remember that agreeing to come over and agreeing to sex are two separate things. Just because a woman is coming over at 1 a.m. on the weekend after a sexy and fancy dinner date doesn’t mean she’s up for sex. Of course, I’d say there’s a pretty good chance she want to have sex but you can’t be certain.

Be prepared for her to say no for whatever reason (it doesn’t matter actually). Should she not seem into it, is too drunk, or says no for whatever reason, respect her request. Don’t show disappointment or anger! Doing so will ensure she never sees you again. Instead, respect her wishes and just hang or if you want to sleep, tell her no worries, should I order you an Uber?

She is clearly into you. If you see her as a long-term prospect there is no rush to have sex with her.

Dating Decoded

Utilizing the tips above can not only help you know how to get your date in the mood but can ensure she’ll be coming back for more. I want your date #3 to go smoothly and be enjoyable, which my tips should help you accomplish. The third date is a big step in any relationship and shouldn’t be taken lightly. For more third-date resources, see the below articles: 

Third Date Tips to Help You Close the Deal

How to Invite Her Back to Your Place on the Third Date

Questions to Ask Her on a Third Date

But these tips alone might not be enough to ensure she comes back to your place. 

There are so many nuances that go into building a new relationship. So many little steps you’ll have to nail in order to have the relationship you want with the woman you want.

That’s where our program, Dating Decoded comes in. 

We’ve accepted men who haven’t gone on a date in years into our program, only for them to score dozens of dates within weeks.

Think I’m fudging the results, just ask our student Naeem who has notched 31 dates since enrolling in Dating Decoded.

Our program focuses on meeting women both online and IRL in order to fill up your dating funnel. From there we’ll teach you the skills you need to quickly bond with your ideal partner.

We teach students via four learning pathways:

• Online Curriculum – Dozens of hours of content covering a range of romantic skills
• Live Sessions – Two weekly live sessions where we’ll find solutions to your unique dating obstacles + bi-monthly Man Cave sessions where guys get together to talk about their dating lives and support one another
• Mock Dates – Practice what you’ve learned in our program with our mock date specialists and receive feedback after every practice date
• Online Community – Online and IRL community where our students and coaches get together to strategize, bond, and make new connections

Book a 1-on-1 intro call with us to chat about your goals and discuss how our program, Dating Decoded can help you achieve your romantic goals.