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57 Flirty Texts for Her During the Courting Phase

57 Flirty Texts for Her During the Courting Phase

Courtship is a lot like slacklining.

You must strut a meticulous and balanced walk during the early stage of any courtship. Should you slip and fall, you may well say goodbye to that relationship. Any major events could generate a sizeable response from your romantic interest, one that might leave you flying high or on your ass.

Any single man understands the importance of technology in dating. Today we walk around with 24/7 single clubs in our pockets (i.e. dating apps).



We also have nearly 24/7 access to the people whose contact info we have.

With such access, it can be tempting to sling her an impulsive steamy message or two.

But while flirty texts for her are a must, they must be crafted with care.

A flirty comment in person can easily be deflected or gobbled up by conversation. A text however lingers like a puff of smoke on a humid day. It just sits there waiting to be acknowledged.

It’s this fact that makes flirty text messages carry so much weight.

That’s why we’re going to offer up and dissect 50 flirty texts for her that are guaranteed to progress your romantic relationship.

Flirty Texts Before The First Date

The younger the relationship the riskier it is to send flirty messages. Before a first date, keep things light and never explicitly racy. Here, let me show you.

1. Hey Sam, it’s Tony that handsome, witty guy you met on Tinder… your words not mine.

You are handsome and witty but she never called you that and both parties know it. This is the perfect amount of light banter needed to pique her interest. This line can be used after scoring a number from a female regardless of how you got it.

2. This Thursday, ax throwing, 9 p.m. Bring your axes.

Enough with the formalities. She doesn’t want to ping pong vapid messages back for days until you sack up and ask her out. She wants a decisive man that gets to the point. Use TDLs like these to speed things up. And no, this text isn’t flirty, it’s just downright sexy.

3. I’m currently planning our first date and I’ve got a few ideas. We can either play mini-golf, go for a sunset bike ride, or stare into each other’s eyes until we fall madly in love. Personally, I’m up for all three.

During a nascent relationship — or one that doesn’t have a single date under its belt — the only real acceptable way to flirt is to flirt in jest.

4. It is weird that after showing my Mom a photo of you she thinks you’re the one?

Kinda bold, but hey cautious dudes get friend-zoned. Chances are she’ll know you’re messing around, and if she doesn’t it might be best that you find a woman that understands humor.



5. I know you asked for my IG to confirm I am who I say I am, but can I just send you a bunch of awkward bathroom selfies instead?

Always link your IG to your dating apps. She wants to make damn sure that she’s going out with the guy that looks remotely similar to his Hinge profile. If you don’t have IG and she asks for it, offer up this flirty yet silly alternative.

6. I need to confess that I just spent the last hour learning how to salsa so I don’t look like an ass tomorrow. See you on the dancefloor! I’ll be the one killing it.

A little self-deprecating humor balanced out with a bit of confidence is the perfect pre-date flirty text.

Flirty Texts After The First Date

Just because you’ve gone on a single date doesn’t mean it’s time to light some candles and throw on Ginuwine.

Play it cool by putting just the slightest pressure on the accelerator.

7. This is the Daniel Caesar song I was telling you about. Feel free to listen on repeat.

It’s always a good idea to make a post-date message about the first date. It’s even better when your message creates a positive (and drop-dead sexy association).

8. I still can’t get over the fact that we both swam the entirety of the Long Island Sound. Are you up for a race this Tuesday?

A little competition is always welcome.

9. So in case I didn’t make it clear enough that first date was one of the best I’ve had. Let’s meet-up this Saturday, say 1pm?

She knows, you know, there’s no harm in pointing out the obvious. Bonus points for any text that steers the conversation towards a second date.

10. It looks like that kiss never happened. Don’t worry, I’ll give you another chance this Friday.

This risque text only works if you two talked about a first kiss during the first date and created an awesome rapport in short time.

11. I have a problem with you. I can’t seem to concentrate on my work because I keep thinking about you. You’d be doing me a big favor if we just set up a second date now so I could go back to work.

Killin’ itttttt.

12. My friend asked me how the date went… I nearly tore a cheek muscle.

Hyperbole is good as long as it’s not about her body or how you want to marry her. A little flattery is good, just make sure not to scare her away.

13. So did I break your Tinder curse?

You know you did. After she responds in the affirmative ask her on a second date. No second date ideas? No worries, we’ve got you covered.

14. 4/5 stars for the first date. Feel like trying for five stars this Thursday at 6 at Prospect Park?

A little teasing can go a long way… or at least to a second date.



15. I think we can say with some certainty that we like each other, but if this relationship is gonna be serious our dogs need to meet. Spot’s dog park this Monday at 7? You bring the poop bags I’ll bring the frisbee.

Sure this is humorous and all, but with more and more young people opting for dogs instead of children it has more than a grain of truth to it.

16. Literally one of the best dates I’ve had in years. Sweet dreams! (hopefully about me)

Yeah, it’s cheesy… and corny… and kinda lame, but the feels has a way of turning people into mush.

17. There’s an old midwife maxim that goes something like, “you’ll know if she’s the one if you get sloppy and dancefloor and dance to 80s disco.” Sounds like a solid second date plan if you ask me.

Ain’t nothing wrong with a little Earth Wing and Fire on a second date.

18. I think it was the great Abraham Lincoln that once said, “if she doesn’t like bowling and nachos, she isn’t worthy of being the first lady.” So in the name of patriotism, let’s go bowling.

Finding obscure romantic quotes from long-dead presidents is always a good idea.

19. Damn. But like, damn in a good way. That’s all I’ve got to say about that date.

After a first date, it’s always a good idea to say something. To comment on the date 24 hours after it ended will quell any anxious concerns she may have about how you thought the date went.

20. Alright I guess you are the superior kisser, but the only way I’ll ever get better is with practice. Salsa tomorrow?

Obviously only send this is you two made an inside joke about how she’s the better kisser.

21. Margaret Jones!

Using her first and last name with an exclamation point at the end generates interest and is everyone’s favorite word. 

Most likely she’ll text back, “Tucker Tittman!” or whatever your name is (hopefully not Tucker Tittman). From here you’re just a TDL away from your next date.

Flirty Texts After The Second Date

Naturally, things are getting quite steamy.

Adjust your post-second date text accordingly.

22. So should we elope now or maybe give it a third date?

Coming in hot after the second date. That’s what she wants… or is it? Gauge how the date went, if it’s clear that she’s into you, feel free to push the envelope.



23. I figure that if we have time to stalk each other on IG, that we have time enough for a third date.

She just liked your last five posts and you hers, get off the phone and into the bedroom.

24. So you asked what my worst pickup line is… I’m learning about important dates in history. Want to be one of them? But like, wretched pickup lines aside, want to go dancing this Friday?

Flirty texts for her don’t have to be explicitly sexual just because you too keep seeing each other.

25. I’m not even gonna lie, my friends just invited me to the Giants game this Friday but I really only want to spend time with you.

Ditching your friends for her eh? That’ll earn you big time brownie points.

26. I kinda just want to curl up with a good book and an even better woman. Know anyone?

Oh it’s soo on.

27. My dog wanted to let you know that he misses you. He’s asking if you’re available to come over this Friday? I’m not sure I’m even invited.

Man’s best wingman.

28. Just so you know, you already have plans this weekend. They may or may not involve Paris, horseback riding, and sunsets.

Take charge of the relationship by surprising her with kick-ass plans. And no, she doesn’t expect you to steal her away to Paris.

29. Hey so I don’t feel like doing too much this Friday. Maybe just go out with a hot date and dance until like 3 a.m. Nbd.

You’re cool, composed, and most likely going to get laid.

30. Just so you know we’re hanging out tonight.

Tell her what’s up.

31. So either I can send you flirty messages all day or we can go out tonight. You call.

You both know you’re into each other so you’ve got nothing to hide.

32. You, me, sunset, beach, cocktails, cheese, and lots of tongue wars.

Third dates should take place at night, not have financial or time limits, and should be explicitly romantic.

33. So the Internet says I should wait another three days after a second date to text her, but the Internet is also home to QAnon soooo I’m just gonna go ahead and ask you out right now.

The Internet is home to a lot of things. The Internet is home to QAnon. QAnon can’t be trusted and by extension, the Internet can’t be trusted. That’s some airtight logic right there.

34. Remember that time we went to that swanky restaurant, then went dancing until 1 a.m., and then finished the night at my place? No? Should I refresh your memory tonight?

Present her with a fantasy scenario, then reel her in.



35. All our dates thus far have involved wearing some sort of clothing. Want to buck trends and change that up?

Sex. He means he wants to have sex. Make sure you’ve kissed and managed to reach second base before sending this message. And maybe introduce this message at the end of your text thread.

36. Soo I’m currently all alone, and don’t wanna be that way. Want to come over?

It’s lazy sure, but if you two were pawing at each other none stop, it might just be best to invite her over. No one wants to eat apple pie when the real desert is already waiting for you in the bedroom.

37. I want to see what you look like dressed up.

If you’re following the MegaDating blueprint, changes are she dress up for a first or second date.

Also, chances are that after going on cheap yet active first and second dates she’s now dying to go to a nice restaurant and look sexy for you.

This text signals that you’re about to give her what she wants.

Expressing your wants is sexy and creates tension. 

Follow this message up by asking her out on a third date TDL. If you don’t know what a good third date idea is, I’ve got you covered. 

Flirty Texts for Her After The Third Date

After the third date you two should have solidified your feelings with each other with a little thing I like to call intercourse. It’s not guaranteed to happen of course but if you’re MegaDating correctly, it should 100% happen. Here are some flirty text messages to ensure that the relationship keeps going in the right direction.

38. Umm, can we do that again?

You both know what you did, and ya liked it.

39. Is it odd that I ate Indian food today with a fork and knife because my hands still smelled like you and I didn’t want to get rid of your smell. On an unrelated note, I should probably wash my hands more often.

I mean you probably should, I hear there’s a virus going around called LOVE (no but actually it’s called COVID-19 — wash your damn hands).

40. Why does it feel like the radio and conspiring against me and is only playing songs that remind me of you… are you in on this?

Daww, that’s just freakin’ cute.

41. I was just thinking about how you’re the only thing I need… also tacos… wait should we get tacos like right now?

Just to be safe you probably should.

42. She’s freakin’ awesome I can’t wait for you to meet her man.

Did you “mistakenly” send her this text message? I bet you did.



43. So like, when can I parade you around all my friends and make them jealous?

While this is a cheeky flirt message it indicates that you’re actually pretty serious about her. Ready to get serious while simultaneously making all your buddies super jealous? Hells yeah.

44. Are we like ready for our first overnight vaca together?

If she’s made it to three dates it means you’re serious about her. Now it’s time to figure out what the next step is.

45. I have a problem. Last night after the club I got home, took my shirt off, crawled into bed, and realized you weren’t there. We should remedy that next time.

If you’re haven’t had sex yet but know it’s only a matter of time, this card might be worth playing.

46. Is it weird that I’m considering deleting my Tinder?

The goal of dating apps is to find a relationship right? Don’t be afraid to let go of your MegaDating life if you’ve found someone worth calling your girlfriend.

47. Flirting over text is cool and all but it makes it really difficult to kiss you.

You’re damn right it does. Keep the flame alive by scheduling the fourth date.

48. What Are You Wearing Right Now?

If things are spicy yet, they’re certainly about to be after you send this message.

Of course, read the room before you send it. This text implicitly suggests sending a sexy photo. Are you ready to risk such an advance?

Think of the risks, but imagine the rewards. 

49. Crissy, Crissy, Crissy (Wait for her response)

At first glance, this seems like a text you could send at any point in time – but hear me out.

You want to avoid sending seemingly pointless texts in-between the first, second, and third dates.

As the relationship is so new (and fragile), you want to limit meaningful interaction to in-person situations. God forbid your harmless text sparks a conversation that spirals out of control and leads to an hour-long back and forth conversation that zaps the mystery out of the relationship.

Learning about someone is so much richer when done in person. Discussing emotional topics via text takes away the bonding experience that generally accompanies such a discussion.



50. Why are you making me think all these thoughts about you?

To be fair, this is a text that could be sent after the second date (or even the first).

It all depends on the dynamic you’ve been able to cook up during your nascent relationship.

A text like this escalates the mystery because she doesn’t know what you’re thinking, which draws her in.

Naturally, she’ll ask what you’re thinking about her. 

And naturally, you’ll probably want to send a sultry message.

But instead of telling her you’re thinking about naked wrestling, pull back and tell her how awesome she is or how she might be the best kisser you know.

Of course, you can always throw her a curve. She expects you to send a sexy message, so why not take her on a humorous detour?

If you’ve made it this far, sex is nearly a definite, there’s no need to rush things by sending a lascivious text message.

51. Wouldn’t you like to know? 😉

Leaves much to the imagination which is where sexual interest flourishes. Make sure to invite her on a date after this if you don’t already have a date set up.

This is a pretty odd text to send and as such maybe shouldn’t be sent early on in the relationship. If it doesn’t come off right she’ll forgive your weirdness because she already knows who you.

52. What are you doing right now? I want to hear your voice.

Expressing your wants and needs is sexy and masculine.

A man who asks for what he wants often gets it.

And hey, if you don’t, well at least you tried.

The only way you’ll ever get what you want is by asking.  



Flirty Texts That You Should Delete Immediately

Ever get really excited, scribble out a message, and send it without really considering if it was a good idea or not. Here are five texts you may have sent in the past that in no way you should ever send to a woman you’re dating ever again.

53. Let’s have sex.

Really? Is that all you’ve got? Not even an exclamation point.

54. I love your legs.

This is the wrong way to segue into a sexy conversation. When in doubt don’t comment on her body.

55. Drumpf’s finally building his wall!

Keep things as apolitical as possible. If you’re going to talk politics do it in person. Never send her a message celebrating a political policy until you’re 100% aware of where she stands on the political spectrum.

56. Hey did I leave my lighter at your house?

During the early stages of a relationship, texts should be viewed as finite. In that there is only a certain number of texts you’re allowed to send her every week. If you send too many texts the relationship will become stale.

57. Why haven’t you responded yet?

Because. She’s living a life as unique and intricate as your own. If she takes a while to respond don’t fly off the rails or threaten to not see her again. Always keep your cool.

Keeping Your Cool

Not everyone is a suave dating pro.

Some dudes just need a bit more work than others.

If you’re interested in learning how to become a dating maven, book a 1-on-1 Zoom session with yours truly.

Over a span of 12 weeks, you’ll learn how to ask a woman out IRL and via dating apps, how to craft the perfect date, and of course what to text her before and after a date.

If you’re not sure what flirty message to text her next, then the next person you might want to consider texting, is me.



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