If you’re going on 20 dates in 90 days (i.e. MegaDating) you don’t have time to waste your time with a woman that doesn’t like you.

There are so many women knocking at your door that you need to quickly identify women who isn’t into you so you can spend with interested women. But it’s not always easy to know when a woman doesn’t like you or she’s just being nice. Men in particular have an issue with this as study after study shows that men constantly are mistaking female friendliness for flirtatious behavior. 

To save you time, money, and energy, let’s identify the signs a woman doesn’t like you so that spend more time on other women.

Signs a Woman Doesn’t Like You

Don’t assume that just because she’s displayed one of these signs that she isn’t interested in you. 

These signs aren’t concrete billboards that explicitly read, NEXT. They’re subtle signs that are vague and can mean more than one thing.

Only conclude that she isn’t into you after you see a few of these signs. And even then if you really aren’t certain, pull back the curtain of uncertainty and just tell her, “Hey, I’m really into you and would love to see how this progresses, but before going any further I want to know how you feel.”

She Doesn’t Initiate Conversation

We’ve all been there.

Sitting across the room you have this amazing date (or so you think). They’re beautiful, appear intelligent, and interesting, but when it comes to communication you always find yourself willing the conversation forward.

You’re the conversation beast of burden carrying the conversation by probing her with questions and regaling her with stories. She on the other hand is like a sponge. She soaks up everything but offers nothing in return.

Now, it’s possible she’s just boring. That she has nothing to add to the conversation – but even boring people know how to ask questions. 

If you are asking 90% of the questions, chances are she isn’t into you. The more interested we’re into someone, the more questions we’ll ask; it’s that simple.

Perhaps she asks some questions, but they’re very surface-level questions that require quick answers, not open-ended questions that really seek to get to know who you are.

Surface Level Conversation

When we like someone we’ll open up.

We’ll talk wins and losses, discuss politics, talk about hopes and dreams, and let people know who we really are.

Talking about Netflix shows and how global warming is making the weather worse is the opposite of this. The latter are safe surface-level topics that aren’t going to rile anyone up (hopefully).

If she doesn’t open up it means she doesn’t feel comfortable with you yet. This, or she doesn’t want to give you a piece of herself. Just because she’s comfortable with you doesn’t mean she’ll open up. If she doesn’t plan on seeing you again, she’s not going to offer herself up to you and in a sense give you a piece of her. She values herself too much to get real with just any guy.

She (Only) Makes Eye Contact

People love to say that eye contact is a sign that a woman likes you.

False.

Naturally, humans make eye contact with others. When you first walk into a bar, restaurant, the DMV, etc. it’s natural that we hunt out the eyes of others.

So if a woman makes brief eye contact with you at a bar, don’t go telling all your friends that a woman just looked at you. She’s gathering information, nothing more. If it’s prolonged, or if you see her searching you out, and making eye contract repeatedly that, my friend is a sign that she’s interested.

If you’re on a date or chatting with a woman and she makes prolonged eye contact, it’s more than possible that she’s just being friendly and respectful. Eye contact is the expectation, not a sign she’s into you.

To ascertain whether she’s into you or not you need to see more.

Good signs in addition to eye contact include:

• Blushing
• Good body language (body pointed towards you, initiates touch)
• Pupils dilate
• Smiling
• Laughter

These are all valuable non-verbals that help gauge her interest.

All Her Exes Make An Appearance

You thought this was a date between you and her, then she brought all her exes along.

Perhaps they didn’t pull up a chair next to you, but only been talking about her dating life for the past 10 minutes so they might as well be.

When women are really into a guy we won’t talk about our exes, we just won’t. We think it’ll scare guys away, so we avoid them at all costs. If she is openly talking about all the positive things about her exes it means she’s more into them than you.

Bringing up exes is okay if you did it first (so if you recently did this you must not be a member of my coaching program) or if she simply acknowledges them. Dredging up her past and talking about all them men she has loved (in a positive way) is a clear indication that you should pay the bill and get out of there.

If she brings up her past boyfriends, change the conversation. Should she bring the conversation back to her dating history, move on.

The Touch Doesn’t Linger

Unless it’s an uppercut, touches are always good.

She’s not going to touch someone that she dislikes. But there’s a difference between disliking and romantically liking someone. We touch our friends all the time – that doesn’t mean we want to date them. 

Even if she initiates a touch that doesn’t mean she’s into you. The key variable to look at is how she touches you, how long, and where she touches you.

If she’s touching your leg, face, or neck, you my friend are in.

If she touches you and leaves her hand there you’re in.

Also be mindful of if she does this with everyone.

Is she just the touchy-feely type or does she go out of her way to touch you?

Dead Fish

Touching isn’t a one-way street.

Whether it’s a first, second, or third date we recommend breaking the touch barrier. 

So what happens when you put your hand on hers while grabbing a post-dinner drink?

Does she look into your eyes and smile or does she go limp?

If she’s not interested, you might expect her to pull her hand back, but this isn’t always the case. If she feels uncomfortable or unsafe she may not do anything. She may just smile awkwardly. The second your hand lifts she’ll pull hers back and make a mental note to keep her hands out of reach.

Should you elicit this non-response a couple of times, it’s best to keep your hands to yourself. Later on if she initiates contact you’ll know she’s into you.

No Teasing, No Playing

The more we like someone the more we turn into children.

We speak faster, make more physical contact, break personal boundaries, ask personal questions, and joke around like we’re 10 again.

So when she still isn’t teasing or playing with you after a few dates you begin to wonder why. When women have liked you in the past they’ve shown their playful side, but not this woman.

Instead of smiling, laughing, and playing, she’s stoic. She doesn’t show much emotion, her voice remains monotone, and she her expression neutral.

Of course, she could just be a serious person who rarely shows emotion. You won’t know until you learn more about her or see her interact with friends and other people.

You’re No Different Than Everyone Else

Look how she talks to everyone else, now look how she talks to you.

Examine how she interacts with other men and compare it to her interactions with yourself.

Are you being treated like every other guy in the room?

If so, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

It’s not a sign a woman doesn’t like you. While it’s not the former, it can’t be viewed as a good sign either.

Ideally, she’s a little more smiley, happy, and flirty around you. Ideally, she makes more eye contact, touches more, and spends more time around you. It’s okay if this isn’t the case, it just means you have more work to put in. 

She Never Sneaks A Peek

Whether you two are on a date or a party, does she ever sneak a peek when she thinks you aren’t looking?

Does she look at you repeatedly?

The more repeated glances the better. You want her stealing peeks at your eyes, lips, arms, and whatever other body part you claim as your own. She’s stealing these glances because she wants more information about you. There’s something about you that she’s into. If she’s not undressing you from across the room it’s okay, but we know how to remedy that. 

Context Means Everything

Where are you conversing with this woman and how do you know them?

If she’s a colleague, professional acquaintance, friend of a friend, or stranger you met in line for coffee it can be difficult to know for certain if she’s flirting with you.

Chances are she’s playing things close to her chest while being gregarious and respectful of boundaries. The context doesn’t lend itself to showing her much she likes you. Doing so might break certain rules. Be mindful of interacting with these types of people. They feel obliged to be nice do to the connection (or lack thereof).

She Works In Hospitality

Another sign a woman is just being nice is if she works for tips. 

This bartender/server/guide/barber has been super nice. She laughs at your jokes, makes prolonged eye contact, touches your shoulder – clearly she’s into you right?

She is into you, but not in the way you had hoped.

Her job requires her to be good with people. She is there to serve you. She also works off tips. The nicer and more flirty she is, the better tip she’ll receive. It’s easy to fall for a waitress if you haven’t basked in the female gaze for a while.

Don’t be fooled.

If her livelihood depends on your tip, don’t think twice about why she’s flirting.

Always Answering Texts, But Takes Forever

That’s great and all that she’s answering your texts, but does she read it and then wait another 24 hours to respond? No one is that busy all the time?

If you have to wait an entire rotation of the earth until your phone vibrates, it’s a sign a woman doesn’t like you and is just being nice.

Sure we all love playing hard to get and are always wondering how long we should wait to text back someone we’re interested in. But no woman thinks waiting 24 hours to respond is ideal. She ultimately does respond because she doesn’t want to be mean and is too nice to tell you she isn’t interested. This is her way of fading away and hoping you lose interest.

Suddenly Canceling Plans

Has suddenly canceling plans become a habit?

Every time you two are about to go out, boom, so sorry, I have to cancel. 

She cancel and then she doesn’t offer an explanation as to why, doesn’t apologize profusely, and doesn’t make future plans. If this happens more than once, move on to the next one.

Isn’t Flexible When Being Asked Out

If a woman wants to go out this is what asking a woman out looks like:

Hey Jen, want to show me what you got and bowl this Thursday at 8?

Oh sorry, Dave, I can’t this Thursday, what about Sunday?

If she can’t make a date, she’ll propose another one.

A woman that doesn’t want to go out with you, won’t propose a time when she’s available because she doesn’t want to spend time with you. Instead of saying so, she’ll keep rejecting your requests until you get the message. She doesn’t outright say she’s not into you because she doesn’t want to feel awkward, bad, or uncomfortable about rejecting you.

Dating Decoded

We call our program, Dating Decoded because there are so many subtleties in dating that require deciphering.

In our program we help men better understand women so they can have better dates – with the ultimate goal of finding your ideal girlfriend.

We teach students the shortcut to finding their ideal match by MegaDating. MegaDating is our dating philosophy and it shapes everything we teach here at emlovz. Simply put MegaDating is dating prolifically with the specific goal of going on 20 dates in 90 days. This will give you ample women to compare and contrast so you can refine your not only your dating skills but who your ideal partner is 

To teach you how to quickly find highly compatible women in just weeks and become the most eligible bachelor in town you’ll have a team of romantic experts, each skilled in their own unique area to support you. 

• Emyli, co-founder, curriculum developer, head coach, and hosts two coaching sessions every week
• Thomas, co-founder, and coach. He’ll lead the biweekly Man Cave event where men come together to talk dating, bond with one another, and support other single men
• Cat, Brooke, and Audrey are mock date specialists. Go on a practice date with them (and receive feedback) before your next date
• Hailey is your new stylist. She’s worked with celebs from every industry and is now about to raid your closet
• Tilly is our sex coach. She’ll help you get the most out of your sex life so you and your partner are happier between the sheets
• Aundrea is an award-winning fitness coach. Are you ready to eat right and build muscle?
• Mia is our SM specialist. Revamp your SM profiles with her help and start meeting women online

And look, we realize that the single life can be difficult. That’s why when you join Dating Decoded you’re joining a community of supportive men and coaches who are there to listen, support, and encourage you as you navigate the single life. 

Our program offers every student a lifetime membership (as if you’ll need it) so the support won’t stop until you’ve found your ideal partner. 

If you’re ready to find your forever partner, book a zoom session with our team today. Together we’ll talk about your dating history, your goals, and show you how our program, Dating Decoded, can help you find your ideal partner.