Probably one of the hardest things about dating is figuring out how to get a woman’s phone number on dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, or Hinge. There are lots of ways to ask, but which approach will give the best impression? Obviously, you don’t want to seem overeager. And you don’t want to come off as demanding.
A lot of guys let themselves get paralyzed by this and they put off asking for her number. Wrong move. Sure, it’s good to be thoughtful about it — but don’t delay too much. If you don’t ask for her number soon enough, other guys will.
Remember, the goal when using any dating app is to meet her in real life, not message over and over again. So once you get to a point in your messaging where you feel like you’ve developed some rapport, it’s time to take things offline.
Here are 15 examples of how to get a woman’s phone number on Tinder, Bumble, or Hinge.
It pays to be clever, so don’t be afraid to let your personality show!
1. If I had your phone number, we could forget we ever met on Tinder. 🙂
The “secret” of dating apps is that the majority of people can’t stand dating apps. In fact, according to Survey Monkey, 59% of women and 55% of men have a “very negative” or “somewhat negative” opinion of them. For a lot of people, dating apps can even start to feel like a chore (until they take control of the process and start MegaDating).
So, being honest about this is actually a great way to bond with people. Be upfront about the fact that these apps are cringey. She’ll likely agree and realize that she’d much rather be interacting with you some other way… like in person or over the phone. Suddenly, giving you her number will feel like a good idea.
2. If I had your number, I wouldn’t have to be reminded that I’m using a dating app to message you. 🙂
Saying this implies that you think she’s high quality — and that messaging her on a cheesy dating app is less than she deserves. Deep down, this might mirror how she feels. A lot of women hate to be on dating apps is because they start to feel objectified. (This can be true especially if they don’t take the initiative to message men first — so if you’re wondering how to get a woman’s phone number on Bumble, where they do message first, maybe skip this one.)
So this approach acknowledges how cheesy the dating app environment is and lets her know that if you had a better way to talk to her (cough) you would.
3. Shoot me your number so I can text you right before our date to confirm. 🙂
Or another variation of this might be, “Send me your phone number just in case one of us is running late for our date.” Either way, the point is: If you’ve already set up a date, then don’t hesitate to ask for her number! Assuming this is an actual date that includes a TDL (time, date, and location) then asking for her number makes sense.
Just stay true to your word and don’t start over-texting her in the days leading up to the date. After she sends her number, the best thing to do is just simply text, “This is Johnny :)” Then only text again to confirm details of the date. After all, you want to maintain a sense of mystery and save most of your conversation for the time you spend in person because it’s more effective that way.
Also, making this a statement instead of a question (shoot me your number) demonstrates that you’re confident (pretty much the biggest turn-on for women) and are leading the interaction. Finally, telling her that you’ll confirm shows that you’re trustworthy and fully intend on showing up for her.
4. I don’t check this app very often. Do you have a phone number?
A statement like this gives her a sense of urgency. If she doesn’t take things offline, then she may lose her chance with you. Making yourself seem too available can backfire because it can make you seem like you’re lower-value. If you let her know that you have better things to do than to check the app all the time, she’ll probably feel compelled to offer her number if she’s attracted to you.
Why risk losing a good thing? If you want to know how to get a woman’s phone number on Tinder, nudge her a little so she puts some skin in the game.
5. Is this the best way to get a hold of you?
If you’ve been flirting back and forth, and you feel like she’s high quality and want to approach things conservatively, a question like this can work. It subtly stops the momentum of the conversation and forces her to think about whether she wants to take things further.
If she does, she’ll offer her number. If not, she may say “yes” and continue to message you. At that point, you’ll know how interested she is. Just beware if she says “yes,” because she may not have any serious intentions of meeting you. Eventually, the conversation has to move off the app if you want to ever have a face-to-face interaction.
6. Should we take it to the next level?
This one can be risky if you haven’t established a few back-and-forth messages first. But if she’s into you, she might respond with something like, “LOL.” Then you can say, “Not that silly, I meant you sending me your phone number :)”
It’s a cute and clever way to ask, which will kind of smooth over the awkwardness. It’s also a great way to build sexual tension between the two of you. Obviously, you haven’t even met, but if you find each other attractive online and seem to converse well, then a little flirting won’t hurt.
7. I noticed you listed your fears on your bio. Wanna know mine? Getting lost in your Match list before getting your phone number.
This sort of reminds me of an old-school-pickup-line which kind of gives it a romantic tone. If she likes you, it’ll come across as endearing. You’re also reminding her of one brutal fact about dating apps, which is how cluttered women’s inboxes can get. What you’re saying here isn’t wrong — if she doesn’t make a real connection with you offline, you might get buried. Instead, you’re inviting her to take action and show her interest.
8. I really want your phone number. 🙂
Being direct never hurts, especially if you’re a man trying to stay competitive on a dating app. Instead of wondering how to get a woman’s phone number on Hinge, for example, you can just roll the dice. Tell her you want her number and see what happens.
Notice you’re not saying “give me your number” as a command. You’re simply expressing how much you’d like to get to know her offline. If she’s the type of woman who appreciates confidence (and again, most women do) then you might be surprised at how often this can work.
9. I’d love to take this offline and call you. What’s your number?
Has she said that she likes to talk over the phone before meeting in person? Then make it clear that you’ll be actually calling and not texting. Telling her you’d like to give her a call can also especially work well with women over 40 who value phone conversations more than text messages.
In this case, you might even say something like, “I’m old fashioned… can I get your phone number?” If you know that she prefers to talk on the phone for any reason and don’t say you want to call her, then you’re making a mistake. She may even assume that you’re afraid to get on the phone or are otherwise immature. Don’t let her paint you with that brush.
10. I’m headed out of town but I’d love to take you out when I’m back. What’s your number?
This is a great line because it establishes a few things. Number one, saying you’re “headed out of town” tells her that you’re not overeager. It also shows you have a life and responsibilities, and that you’re level-headed enough to make solid plans.
Asking for her number with that kind of lead-in shows her that you’re not willing to drop everything for her, but do value her and want to prioritize spending time together. It will also subtly activate her natural desire to compete for your attention, since although you’re telling her you’re interested, she’s obviously not #1 (yet).
What If She Says No?
Obviously, when you’re figuring out how to get a woman’s phone number on Tinder, no particular approach is a sure thing. No matter how you ask, she might say no to your request for her number. But that’s where you can get even more creative. If you want to see if there’s a chance she’ll change her mind, then take one more shot at it with one of these lines.
11. Are you the 1% that hasn’t purchased a cell phone yet? 🙂
First, a joke like this simply keeps the conversation going. But especially if you’ve been messaging back and forth already, making a gentle jab like this also challenges her to give you a reason for not sharing her number.
You might be pleasantly surprised when she tells you her phone’s being worked on right now and that she might be getting a new number afterward. Even if she does stick to her guns, she may tell you why she’s not interested, which is important feedback for your dating strategy.
12. I’m in sales so I know how to deal with rejection. 🙂 It’s just that I don’t log on to Tinder very often.
Saying something like this will take the pressure off the situation and let her know that you’re not expecting anything serious just because she gives you her number. It also reminds her that if she doesn’t take a step forward by moving the conversation offline, then you’re willing to walk because you don’t routinely communicate through the app.
Of course, you’re not saying this in a mean way — but it’s straightforward enough to give her the message that she needs to step up. The pressure may be enough to make her change her mind.
13. I had a Hinge stalker too. 🙂 Trust me. I won’t bombard you w/ texts…
In today’s world, just explaining that you’re not a psycho can go further than you think! In all seriousness, women experience all kinds of potential “suitors” in the online dating world, and many of them are downright scary. She might have her guard up because of a bad experience. You might take a guess that she’s being extra careful, and ease her mind about that.
Getting over-texted is kind of the nightmare we all want to avoid. Another variation on this line might be, “I promise to only send you one message right before our date. :)” This makes it clear that you want to get to know her and don’t intend to do it entirely over text.
14. 🙁
A simple sad emoji tells her, “It bums me out that you’re not interested but I’m not going to chase you.” With such a brief (but still heartfelt) response, the ball is back in her court. It could spark a desire in her to explain or reconsider, since you’re leaving an awkward silence that she might feel obligated to fill. Even if she doesn’t, you’re not diminishing your worth by begging or otherwise saying something defensive.
15. No problem. The thing is, my thumbs are broken so I can’t text. Tell you what… if we talk and you don’t like me, you have the right to hang up and block me at any time. No hard feelings.
Obviously the broken thumbs part is a joke, but a follow-up like this reminds her that there’s no harm in a phone conversation. It also tells her that you have no intention of being a clingy over-texter. It puts everything back into a healthy perspective so she can see that maybe she was being a little rigid about dissing you right away. And, it makes you sound rational and pretty low-risk.
16. I’m old school and don’t have any social media. Is WhatsApp cool with you? I promise to send you some awkward bathroom selfies so you know what I look like.
Don’t be surprised if she says no.
If she’s not 100% comfortable she won’t give you her number. What she will give out is her IG, FB, or Twitter.
These are no-gos. You want to be taken seriously not toyed with. Accept her number or nothing. Tell her you don’t have SM or aren’t a fan and reiterate that you prefer her phone number.
17. I think it’s time we took our relationship to the next level… sending SMS messages.
If she deflects or rejects your request tell her you want to take things to the next level. Then add levity by saying you’d step things up by sending SMS messages.
If she once again deflects, talk to her some more and address her fears before once again asking for her number or asking her on a date.
How to Get a Woman’s Phone Number on Tinder, Bumble, or Hinge: Conclusion
The biggest thing to remember when learning how to get a woman’s phone number on Tinder, Bumble, or Hinge is that things aren’t really progressing until you take the conversation off the app. Constant messaging back and forth, even if you’re flirting, can be fun — but messages don’t mean that she’ll go out with you.
The only way to determine if she’s really interested is to put it to the test and ask for that number. If she doesn’t want to give it, try to figure out why if you can. Many women may tell you why, which will either turn things around completely or simply give you a valuable lesson.
Keep trying until you’ve amassed a total of three rejections. At this point stop investing in someone that doesn’t want to invest in you.
And if it doesn’t work, keep MegaDating, because there’s always someone new out there who may be a better fit for you anyway.
Need help with MegaDating or want to learn more about how it works?
Feel free and book a New Client 1-on-1 Zoom Session with me to learn more.
When it comes to dating, learning to read between the lines is crucial. I help men with their communication challenges in dating every day and have gotten amazing results. I can’t wait to do the same for you!
