Have you ever tried speed dating? Is speed dating worth it? These are questions I get from my clients every week.
Like online dating, speed dating has become a mainstream way to connect with singles you wouldn’t run into otherwise. Long gone are the days where you had to feel insecure about attending a speed dating event or consider such nights out taboo.
Nowadays, everyone is having a grand old time downloading multiple dating apps, attending speed dating events, and basically letting it all hang out (figuratively, of course…I mean…for the most part) when it comes to the modern day dating landscape.
In this article, I will let delve into all the reasons why you should try speed dating this year. I will also elaborate on some expert strategies to help you up your dating game and attract quality, gorgeous women.
Reason #1: It’s Not Weird Anymore
Let’s face it — the tales of weirdness that affixed themselves to speed dating during times past would make anyone shudder at attending such an event. Hence the reason so many people considered speed dating taboo. Moreover, the awkwardness that used to be associated with speed dating seemingly led to such comical imaginings of speed dating events, like this one in the 2005 film, 40-Year-Old Virgin:
Speed dating isn’t something to shudder at anymore. In fact, it’s actually a great way to shift gears with friends when it comes to your usual happy hour. That brings me to my next point.
Reason #2: You Don’t Have to Go it Alone
Speed dating’s increasing popularity has made it a great event for those looking to hang out with friends in a more unique and creative way. You don’t have to go it alone when it comes to speed dating.
Invite some of your favorite single wingmen to come along with you. Even if you don’t make a great connection with anyone, you’ve still had a great night out with the boys.
Reason#3: Even if Things Get Weird, it’s a Fun Night
Remember that this is a social event and it’s meant to be fun. In fact, organizers of speed dating events are banking on you having a great night — regardless of whether or not you make any real romantic connections — so they work to create an atmosphere that is laid back and enjoyable.
Even if you have an interaction that is weird enough to fit into the aforementioned scene from 40-Year-Old Virgin, laugh it off. You’re there to have a good time with friends and if something weird happens, you now have a new story to tell at parties.
Moreover, there is a limited amount of time for things to go awry in speed dating because of how these events are designed. That brings me to my next point.
Reason #4: Bad “Dates” Are Only a Few Minutes
Speed dating is a bit of a game of musical chairs. You have approximately three minutes (this varies depending on the event) to chat up a single before people are asked to move on to the next person.
Unlike actual bad dates, you don’t have to worry about suffering through at least an hour with someone you have zero chemistry with.
Reason #5: It’s Affordable
Speed dating events are usually between $25 and $30. They include cocktails and munchies, which makes this a great and affordable night out.
Reason #6: Everyone Is There for a Date
When you go to a speed dating event, you know that everyone there is single and looking for a date. This offers you a huge advantage over meeting someone at a bar or out and about. How many times have you approached a woman at a club or lounge only to find out she had a boyfriend or was married?
Or maybe the possibility of a woman being taken has made it more difficult for you to approach her?
With speed dating, those fears are automatically allayed, making it easier to pick up women.
Reason #7: It Gives You a Chance to Practice Your Charisma
When it comes to finding success in the dating world, practice makes perfect. Anyone can become good at approaching women in a charismatic manner if they practice enough.
Even if a joke you tell falls flat or you feel like a bundle of nerves during your first few interactions at a speed dating event, that’s ok. You’re going to have a ton of opportunities to chat up different women. And each one gives you the opportunity to make a new first impression. You don’t have to worry about trying to recover from a bad opening line because you’re literally being given a revolving door of women.
Reason # 8: It’s Better Than Going to a Bar
Bars have long been viewed by many people as the best places to meet women. However, the bar scene can be fraught with:
- Women that are going to find a rebound relationship after a bad breakup
- Women who are in relationships
- Women who honestly just wanted a night out with their friends and have no interest in getting hit on
Moreover, a lot of people who aren’t alcoholics might get wild and out of control on a Saturday night. Maybe you do that from time to time as well. There’s nothing all that romantic about sloppily hitting on someone and the two of you subsequently pawing at each other at the bar.
Furthermore, if you meet a girl while both of you are drunk, your inhibitions are lowered. You’re more likely to hook up, which is actually a bad thing if you’re hoping to find a long term girlfriend and relationship. Dating needs to follow a strategic pace and that means sex shouldn’t come into play until at least the third date (more on that in a bit).
Speed dating events often include alcohol, but the atmosphere is much different than that of a crowded bar. People are pacing themselves and having maybe one or two drinks to loosen up as opposed to rounds of shots and beer after beer after beer.
Reason #9: It Should Be on Your Bucket List
Honestly, speed dating is just one of those things that I think should be on everyone’s bucket list. A lot of people feel awkward or scared of speed dating. But that’s all the more reason to try it. Research shows that facing your fears is conducive to overall health, happiness, and success.
Reason #10: It’s MegaDating at Lightning Speed
I love recommending speed dating to my single male clients. When you go to speed dating event, you’re basically practicing MegaDating at lightning speed.
What is MegaDating?
MegaDating is a dating process that involves dating several different people at the same time in order to diffuse your energy by keeping your social calendar full.
When you MegaDate, you avoid several common pitfalls that people experience in the dating world, such as:
- Settling for the mediocre
- Getting hung up on the idea of “the one”
- Chasing after one woman who is invariably going to put you in the friendzone
MegaDating is not about being a player or sleeping around. In fact, you don’t have to have sex at all while MegaDating. This strategy simply allows you to open yourself to different people so that you can develop a greater understanding when it comes to what you actually want in a partner.
This dating process also reduces the anxiety and stress that often comes with dating. We all hate getting rejected. But a fear of rejection can unconsciously hamper your efforts when it comes to finding a long-term relationship because this fear leads you to avoidance when it comes to approaching women.
When you MegaDate, rejection is easier to handle because you aren’t preoccupied with one person. You’re dating a few different women, so one person losing interest or turning you down when you ask her out on a date isn’t such a big deal.
And when it comes to MegaDating, practice makes perfect. You need to put yourself out there in a variety of ways, including online dating, meeting through friends and speed dating.
Like I said, speed dating is basically MegaDating at lightning speed, which is why I highly recommend it. It’s a great way to talk to several women in one night and practice your approach without a ton of added pressure.
Now that we’ve covered a lot of the basics/benefits that come with speed dating, let’s dive a little bit deeper into what you should do if you experience great romantic chemistry with someone at a speed dating event.
Strategy #1: Create a Compelling Date Idea
Although you have a limited amount of time to chat with someone during speed dating, you should be able to gauge what the woman is interested in. Before you even go to the speed dating event, come up with a variety of compelling first date ideas that could appeal to a variety of interests.
If there’s someone you hit it off with during your brief encounter, approach her again with a date idea. Speed dating events offer time to mingle freely at the end of the evening so that you can make plans with different people.
You also want to make sure that each compelling date idea has a clear TDL. A TDL in an acronym that means Time, Date, and Location. It’s what we here at EmLovz use to refer to a date’s call-to-action.
When you create a compelling date idea and use a TDL, you’re taking an guesswork out of the date, which is what girl’s want. Lots of guys approach women and ask if they “want to hang out,” “wanna grab a coffee,” or “go grab a drink.”
Not only is this boring but most guys don’t really have a time, place or day of the week planned out, which can lead to a frustrating back-and-forth.
By offering her a compelling date idea with a clear TDL, you stand out from the competition.
Strategy #2: Use My Failproof Dating Blueprint
If you’re concerned about breaking the bank while MegaDating, don’t worry. You can easily hang out with several women at one time without spending a ton of money. To help my male clients with this very thing, I came up with my fail-proof dating blueprint for the first three dates:
- First date: The first date should less than an hour, take place during the day and cost no more than $10-$15 (preferably $10). The goal of this date is to build trust and rapport. When you meet a woman at a speed dating event, it can count as the beginning of your first date.
- Second date: The second date should be something active and free. Some great examples would be going for a hike or visiting a really cool museum. The goal of this date is to escalate sexual tension. Here are some physical second date ideas and other second date ideas that’ll knock her socks off.
- Third date: The third date is where you can go all out with the nice intimate dinner. The goal of this date is to figure out if the two of you are a good fit as far as morals and values go. Physical intimacy often occurs during this date. Here’s an article one of my contributors wrote for third date tips on closing the deal.
Strategy #3: Hire a Dating Coach
I’ve helped men all around the world overcome their dating roadblocks and find lasting love. I can do the same for you!
Whether you need help with things like speed dating, conquering self-confidence issues and navigating your way through the tricky world of online dating, I’ve got you covered.
Ready to get started? Head over to my calendar and book a new client 1-on-1 Skype session with me today! During our session, we will create an individualized action plan to help you crush your dating goals.
I’d also like to invite you to check out my Dating Profile Services. These services will quickly improve the number of responses to your outgoing messages, the amount of incoming numberes you receive, your overall profile views, and more.