Is your sedentary lifestyle putting you in a dating rut? A sedentary lifestyle and an unhealthy dating life may not seem mutually exclusive, but there are many ways that being inactive can have a detrimental effect on your love life. In fact, it can even hamper your efforts when it comes to finding a long term, compatible girlfriend.
In this article, I’ll talk about what it means to have a sedentary lifestyle (you may be living this way and not even realize it!), the effects of a sedentary lifestyle, and what you can do to make positive changes.
What is a Sedentary Lifestyle?
Many people associate a sedentary lifestyle with overweight or obesity, but this isn’t always the case. Being sedentary simply means that you spend a majority of your time sitting or being inactive. Sometimes people choose to be sedentary, while others can easily fall into this lifestyle due to a desk job, stress, and long hours spent in the office.
You may be a perfectly healthy weight if you’re sedentary and don’t engage in things like overeating, or simply have a high metabolism. But the numbers on the scale don’t really matter according to a study from Cambridge University. If you aren’t exercising and spend a majority of your time parked in a chair, you are likely to have the same risks as people with obesity, including a higher risk of heart disease, as well as the development of many different types of cancer.
A Sedentary Lifestyle is a Major Buzzkill
Don’t people sit down during dates? And how is being inactive supposed to affect connecting with someone on a romantic level?
Well, it affects it in many ways, actually. Exercise is a great way to stave off things like depression and anxiety. Conversely, a lack of exercise can affect your mood by leaving you feeling more crabby than usual, stressed and anxious.
Regardless of your weight, a lack of activity can also have a big impact on your self-image. When you don’t exercise, you’re at a higher risk for weight gain and indulging in unhealthy foods. All of this can leave you lethargic and uncomfortable in your own skin.
When you aren’t confident with your image and just feel a general sense “blah,” you exude that negative energy to the rest of the world, and women aren’t going to find that appealing.
Your Brain Health Suffers
When you live a sedentary lifestyle, you are at a higher risk of cognitive decline. Older adults living a sedentary lifestyle may be at a great a risk of developing dementia as those who are genetically predisposed to the condition, according to a study.
And even at a young age, those who have a sedentary lifestyle are generally more forgetful and have more difficulty concentrating than those who are active.
When it comes to dating, you don’t want to seem distracted or forgetful on a date, or worse, forgetful when it comes to remembering important anniversaries and plans. Women want a man that is sharp and on top of his game. If you show signs of forgetfulness early on, many women will write this off as a red flag and end things before the relationship gets too serious.
A Sedentary Lifestyle Can Affect Your Sex Life
Let’s face it — a good sex life involves stamina. And if you’re not active, it’s going to be more difficult to keep the chemistry up (among other things) in the bedroom. Sex is an important part of any relationship, so you don’t want to allow a lack of inactivity to leave you and your partner unsatisfied in that department.
Along with not having a lot of stamina, a sedentary lifestyle can be a major culprit when it comes to weight gain. And studies show that men who are obese are twice as likely to develop erectile dysfunction as men who are not.
Because you’re not getting rid of excess energy and calories through exercise, your sedentary lifestyle can keep you up all night. A lack of quality sleep can lead to things like decreased concentration, bad mood, anxiety, and it can even increase your risk of illness.
Along with adding more activity into your life, check out these tips for the National Sleep Foundation to get more shut-eye.
Now that you know some ways that a sedentary lifestyle is putting you — and your dating life — in a rut. Let’s take a look at some ways to turn things around.
Moderate Your Alcohol Intake
If your sedentary lifestyle is the result of an office job or high stress, it may be easy to turn to some evening cocktails as a way to ease your mind. There’s nothing wrong with drinking socially or having a nightcap, but be careful not to overdo it.
Drinking heavily can encourage a sedentary lifestyle by:
- Leading to sleep disruptions
- Making you more tired in general
- Increasing symptoms of depression and anxiety
When you’re stressed, instead of grabbing a beer, consider taking a brisk walk or call a trusted friend to chat about it.
Take a look at your diet and see where you can modify things. Do you eat a lot of refined sugars and processed foods? When eaten in excess, these can have a serious impact on your weight and even your mood.
According to the Harvard Health Blog, unhealthy diets can leave you feeling seriously down in the dumps. To naturally increase your energy and improve your mood, choose whole foods with a limited list of ingredients (and definitely not ingredients you can’t pronounce, such as chemical additives). The following are great options when it comes to keeping your waistline trim and your mood high:
- Dark leafy greens like kale and spinach
- Foods high in B vitamins, like avocados and almonds
- Salmon and other types of fish and oils that contain omega-3 fatty acids
- Oysters — they contain high levels of zinc, which are great for immunity
- Pickled foods that have probiotic elements can relieve stomach upset and improve anxiety, as well. A bonus that comes with pickles is that they have very few calories, so you don’t need to worry about packing on the pounds by chowing down
This one probably seems pretty obvious, but it may also be the most intimidating tool in shaking your sedentary lifestyle.
People often balk at the idea of exercise, because they picture working out as something the requires a lot of weight lifting, running for miles and miles, sweating buckets and aching from head to toe. But including exercise into your life doesn’t have to start as some drastic change or anything unpleasant.
According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, doing exercises like jogging, walking and biking for 30 minutes a day, five days a week is a great way to get started. And if that seems too much, you can start off with 10-20 minutes per day and work your way up.
Another awesome exercise that doesn’t really feel like exercise is hiking. Hiking is great because it puts you in a natural environment that automatically alleviates stress and gets your heart rate up at the same time. If you’re not sure where to start when it comes to finding a cool hiking trail that fits your skill level and needs, I recommend downloading the AllTrails app.
Make Your Dates More Active
Do most of your dates involve sitting across from the person, interview-style, at a bar or coffee shop? If your answer is “yes,” you’re not alone — but this type of date is a problem.
Meeting with someone for a drink on a first and second date doesn’t offer anything very compelling to help you connect with a new person. Sitting interview-style (which is normal for these types of dates) can also increase nervousness on a date, making things awkward.
To remedy this, I always recommend my clients pick something creative and active for the first couple of dates. Active dates offer you and your date something to engage in, which will help with lulls in conversation. Getting physical during a date is also a great way to escalate sexual tension by naturally breaking the touch barrier (i.e., helping her up a steep area on a hiking trail).
This is a great way to introduce yourself to more physical activity in a fun way, so that you can stop allowing a sedentary lifestyle to keep you in a right. Some examples of cool active date ideas include:
- Miniature golf
- Taking a long walk on the beach or park, followed by a picnic
- A scenic bike ride
- Visiting a museum or aquarium where you have plenty of places to walk around
When you’re not in a relationship or seeing a woman exclusively, one way you can include a lot more activity in your life — and crush your dating goals FAST — is through MegaDating.
What is MegaDating?
MegaDating is a dating process that involves going out with several different women at once in order to diffuse energy and keep your calendar full. When you MegaDate, you end up increasing your confidence and decreasing dating anxiety because you will be seeing firsthand that there truly are plenty of fish in the sea.
Moreover, MegaDating gives you plenty of practice in the dating world, so that you will be better at handling things like rejection, will stop chasing after women who aren’t worth your time, and will ultimately be able to find the right partner. I used MegaDating as my main strategy during my 100-date experiment. It led me to a compatible, long-term relationship and it can do the same for you!
Ready to get started? Need some personal guidance?
Get Active in Crushing Your Dating Goals
If you’re stuck in a dating rut and are ready to start crushing your goals, I’m here to help. I’ve worked with men throughout the world and provided individualized plans to help them conquer their specific issues and find the woman of their dreams. I focus on helping men who are hard working and looking for REAL relationships.
To get started on your road to success, head over to my calendar and book a new client 1-on-1 Skype session with me today. During our session, we will discuss your dating goals and create an action plan to help you overcome your dating roadblocks. We’ll also determine if my 3 month coaching program could be right for you.