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Dating Coach vs Matchmaker: Do I Need One or Both?

Dating Coach vs Matchmaker: Do I Need One or Both?

Dating is fun but it can also feel like a second job.

Putting yourself out there on apps, crafting endless first messages, and checking your phone for notifications is exhausting. Like a lot of guys, you probably want a solution to speed up the process.

But then, you have to ask: Do I need a dating coach? Do I need a matchmaker? When it comes to a matchmaker vs dating coach, which one is worth the investment?



Only you can answer this question.

Matchmakers and dating coaches are very different.

They each have their specific advantages.

Plus, lots of men combine matchmaking with coaching, which can really help crush your goals in one powerful punch.

Whatever you decide, just do it carefully. This is your hard-earned money and time you’re talking about. You won’t just need a steady stream of dates. Those women will need to be compatible with the real you — and in many cases, you’ll also need strategic advice and support to turn those dates into long-term prospects.

matchmaker vs dating coach

Reasons to Hire a Dating Coach

When you work with a dating coach, you choose the women you go out with. But of course, the pool of women that’s available to you might be limited. Maybe you’re not interested in any of the women who you’ve met lately. That’s where a dating coach comes in.

A dating coach helps you develop the skills you need to attract the women you really want — much more quickly than you could alone.

A coach will look at how you approach women, your dating profiles, the types of women you’re meeting, and how you interact on dates to give you 100% honest feedback on what’s not working and why. Not only that, but a coach will give you a better plan for finding the love you’re looking for. At that point, it’s up to you to go get it!

Here are a few other reasons why dating coaches work well for men:

Your skills may be rusty

If you’ve been out of the game for an extended period of time — let’s say in a long-term relationship or you were hyper-focused on your career or school — then a coach can stop you from making rookie mistakes in today’s dating world.



At emlovz we equip you with every possible skill you could need to woo that cute girl you just met at your friend’s party.

Via our self-paced online curriculum and live weekly coaching sessions, we teach you the skills you need to find a girlfriend ASAP.

Just a few of the topics we dive into include:

We’re constantly developing our online curriculum. We recently teamed up with sex coach Tilly Storm to cover topics like foreplay, how to have better sex, and female anatomy.

And unlike a matchmaker that will ditch you in a few months, with us you’ll have lifetime access to our platform and community. 

Coaches are invested in your success

Your success feeds their business.

Why wouldn’t a coach want to do everything they could to help you find an awesome woman?

Coaches largely work on referrals, and so you can rest assured that you’ll be taken care of.

They’ve also “been there”

By that I mean, any successful coach will have a lot of dating experience under their belt. Personally, I conducted a 100-date experiment several years ago, where I went on dates with 52 men to not only to find love (spoiler alert: I did) but also analyze men’s dating approaches. I turned all of those valuable insights into my current business, where I teach men the secrets that help them avoid common mistakes.

You’ll get support when you need it

I won’t claim that every single date you go on after starting coaching will be a home run. It’s a process. That said, when you have a bad date or get frustrated, you may not want to turn to a friend. Maybe it’s too embarrassing. But a coach can give you that emotional and tactical support you need to keep going.

At emlovz we have a host of coaches, each bringing something unique to the table.

Here’s a quick breakdown:



  • Emyli Lovz is a co-founder and has built the online curriculum and will lead the weekly strategy sessions
  • Thomas Anthony is also a co-founder and provides men with a male perspective. Tom also hosts the Man Cave, a monthly session exclusive to our male students where guys talk it out in a judgement free environment
  • Audrey and Brooke are mock date specialists – want to practice dating in a controlled environment? Chat with them!
  • Mia is our social media specialist, if you want to optimize your presence online she’s your guru
  • Hailey is your stylist fairy, if you want to look spiffy AF for your first date she’s got you covered
  • Aundrea is here to set you up with a fitness and meal plan so you can look ripped (or just a bit more fit) for your new Tinder date

matchmaker vs dating coach

They’ll give you an objective POV

Why do women tend to perceive you in a certain way?

Especially if your coach is a woman, you’ll get specific answers to this question. You can then change your approach instantly instead of trying out random ideas or even worse, doing the same thing over and over.

Our mostly staff of female coaches knows exactly what women want. They know the female brain inside and out (literally).

Coaches are always willing to provide you with objective advice on how to handle any situation. With emlovz you can always chat with a coach via our online community or during the two live sessions we offer every week.

You could save money

In my coaching practice, I only recommend that my clients spend $20 on the first date and nothing on the second.

People often balk at this — until they understand my philosophy and start implementing my three-date blueprint.

Attracting a woman really comes down to building your skills at developing trust and rapport. When done correctly, it often leads to intimacy on date #3. With coaching, you don’t have to rely on expensive dates to impress women.

A defined philosophy

Matchmakers have a pretty straightforward mission statement: to find you women to date.

What they don’t have is a philosophy that shapes their strategy.

A top-notch dating coach will have a philosophy that shapes everything they do.



For emlovz, it’s MegaDating.

MegaDating is the act of dating several women at once. Doesn’t sound too shabby does it?

We take a proactive dating approach in order to help you quickly find a compatible partner you can enjoy for the rest of your life.

We teach men how to go on various dates in a short period of time. Dating so many women at once has more than a couple of benefits:

  • Refines dating skills
  • Helps you figure out the type of woman you want to be with
  • Boosts confidence
  • Prevents you from settling
  • Quickly will find you a compatible long-term partner

Reasons to Hire a Matchmaker

Unlike a dating coach, a matchmaker pre-screens women and finds dates for you. Instead of putting the work into finding women you can hang back and let the matchmaker do that for you.

matchmaker vs dating coach

Anyone who wants help finding dates can benefit from a matchmaker, but certain types of guys tend to fall into this category often. They are:

1. Guys who are simply way too busy to mine for dates themselves.

As I said at the top of this article, the dating process is a grind. Not only that, it takes time. That’s especially true if you’re not being particularly strategic about how you use the apps. You can definitely learn to be successful at prospecting, but like any other skill, it requires a time investment.

Depending on where you are in your life, this may not be realistic. If you’re working 10-hour days and barely have enough time to microwave dinner at night before falling into bed, only to wake up the next day and do it all over again, studying date theory probably isn’t at the top of your list. And that’s okay. That’s why matchmakers exist.

2. Guys who are very visible in their community.

You might be a lawyer, judge, politician, or another type of professional who simply can’t be seen on dating apps for various reasons. Perhaps sharing information about yourself on an app would risk your local reputation or contradict your brand image. Maybe your business relies on word-of-mouth referrals from your community, and you don’t want to threaten that. A matchmaker could be a fit.

Matchmakers usually can choose more quality dates than you could yourself. They have a personal network they can tap into. They also look deeply into the nuts and bolts of people’s personalities, picking up on details you wouldn’t notice about certain women who might be compatible with you.



Once you let a matchmaker know what you want, a matchmaker can usually deliver several options. After that, the ball is in your court.

Question is, can you take it from there?

Be honest with yourself…

If a matchmaker sets you up with your most ideal woman tomorrow, can you comfortably say you have the skills to get her on a second date and into a relationship in the next six weeks?

If you can’t say that, you’ll want to team up with a coach.

WARMING: Something To Know About Matchmakers

Here’s the thing about matchmakers. 

Before hiring a matchmaker be sure to ask how they find women to set you up with.

More specifically if they have a pool of women they pull from. Chances are they do as this is how 99% of matchmakers operate. What this means is that they have a limited supply of women to pair you with. If your ideal partner isn’t in your matchmaker’s limited network you’re out of luck.

Being that you don’t have the skills to find women yourself (if you’re fully relying on a matchmaker to find you women) you’re shit out of luck.

What If You Could Do Both?

When it comes to comparing a matchmaker vs a dating coach, both have their advantages. But nothing really compares to using both together.

Using a matchmaker with dating coaching gives you the best of both worlds. You’ll skip over all the work you may not have time for anyway — scrolling through random profiles, making selections, writing messages — and get high-quality options delivered to you. On top of that, the coaching program will arm you with the skills and knowledge to turn those dates into serious prospects for you to choose from.

I’ll warn you now… it’s a powerful combination and could result in you having to make some tough decisions! But mainly, it will help ensure that you find great women as quickly as possible. You also won’t run the risk of losing out on a quality opportunity.

Another reason to combine matchmaking and coaching is that it keeps both parties accountable. Have you ever used a matchmaker and didn’t hear from them for six weeks? That’s actually not unusual. Once a matchmaker has provided you with quality prospects, they’ve kept up their end of the bargain. They assume that you’re busy planning dates and enjoying getting to know the women they’ve selected for you. So why should they follow up before you’ve had time to do just that?

While they may be right, some men find that a bit off-putting. They may not like the “hands-off” feeling once the women are selected and prefer to keep in touch during the dating process. Not only do they want support, but they also want specific advice on interacting with the women selected for them. And of course, no one could give better tips than the matchmaker who set them up in the first place.



So, using matchmaking with coaching services often makes the most sense.

In our program, Dating Decoded we’ll teach you how to meet women AND how to make them fall for you. What I should also mention is that we often team up with Matchmakers. Matchmakers are always knocking at our door to try to pair their female clients up with our male students. 

Instead of spending money on a dating coach and a matchmaker, why not team up with us where you get two for the price of one?

Matchmaker vs Dating Coach: It’s Your Call

Hopefully, you now have a much better idea of what’s involved with a matchmaker vs dating coach. The answer to “do I need a matchmaker?” or “do I need a dating coach” is a little complex, and really depends on you. While dating coaches can help support you and develop your dating skills, matchmaking takes away the emotional labor of having to find good prospects. You’ll need to decide, based on where you are on your journey, what you need in order to move forward.

Obviously, combining both is ideal. I recommend booking an intro call with me to find out more about our services here at emlovz.

No matter what you decide, I hope that you take a step forward. Taking a random approach to dating often can waste precious time. And when it comes to love, it’s worth getting things right! Make the investment for yourself. I promise you won’t regret it.

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