How to Make Her Miss You & Stay Interested When She’s Leaving Town for Several Weeks
You’re in the beginning stages of dating an awesome woman and things couldn’t be going better. The problem?
She’s going out of town for several weeks and you’re wondering if that distance will turn the fire in between you two into ashes. If you’re wondering how to make her miss you and how to keep her interested, you’ve come to the right place.
First: What is the Status of Your Relationship?
Before deciding the right strategies to use, assess the status of your relationship. Ask yourself:
- Have you been on at least three dates with this woman?
- Have you been physically intimate?
- Did you already have a discussion and decide that you want to date each other exclusively?
Assuming that you two are exclusive and things have been going well, there probably isn’t too much you need to worry about, despite the fact that she will be gone for several weeks.
Distance can actually make the heart go fonder, as they often say. Still, you need to use the strategies below to make her miss you, keep her interested, and also make sure that she knows you’re still interested.
But let’s say you haven’t been on more than a couple dates with her, haven’t been intimate and are not exclusive. Since you like her a lot, you definitely want to use the strategies below to keep her interested, but you also need to make sure you’re not putting all your eggs in one basket.
Before making a commitment to someone, I always recommend my clients use MegaDating to help them reach their dating goals. MegaDating is a dating strategy that involves going on dates with several different people at the same time in order to diffuse your energy and keep your calendar full.
MegaDating is not about being dishonest or sneaking around on somebody. It is a strategy that shows you there are plenty of fish in the sea and prevents you from settling for someone who isn’t a compatible partner.
If you have been out on a couple of dates with a girl and they go out of town, MegaDating will reduce your anxiety and lessen the fear of rejection. This isn’t to say that the girl you’ve just started seeing if going to forget about you simply because she’s out of town.
But you won’t be ruminating about the hypothetical death of relationship by travel because you’re already hanging out with other girls who could potentially make good partners.
Strategies for Making Her Miss You While She’s On Vacation
#1: How Do You Not Seem Desperate?
Whether or not you are exclusive, it’s important that you don’t show her any symptoms of being a stage 5 clinger. Just because she’s out of town for several weeks doesn’t mean she’s going to automatically forget you and move on — it’s several weeks, not several years.
To avoid seeming desperate, avoid the following things:
- Screaming “DON’T FORGET ABOUT ME!!” as you chase her departing plane down the runway
- Telling her you’re worried that she is not going to be interested in you after leaving — keep that to yourself
- Bombarding her with text messages and/or calls
- Ruminating over what she’s doing, who she’s seeing
- Chronically checking her social media accounts to make sure she’s not banging a bunch of dudes on her vacation
Think about if you really liked a girl and had to go out of town for a while. Wouldn’t you prefer her to trust that you’re not going to up and forget about her simply because you’re out living life?
Another way you can avoid being desperate, aside from MegaDating if you’re not exclusive, is to keep your calendar full with other activities. Spend time with friends, go to the gym and find fun things to do while she’s away.
If you stay busy, this will keep you from the temptation of blowing up her phone and will also make those several weeks pass by quickly.
Strategy #2: How Long Should I Wait to Text Her?
When trying to figure out how to make her miss you, I’m sure you’re thinking “I’ll just text her right away and every so often.” But your first text to her depends on the status of your relationship.
If you’ve decided to make an exclusive commitment and have been dating for a long enough period of time that things are hot and heavy, I’d say text her when her plane is scheduled to land to tell her that you hope she had a safe flight and to wish her a lot of fun times during her vacation.
If you’ve only been on a couple of dates with this woman, make sure that before she leaves (i.e., the last time you see her in person before her trip) that you let her know you want her to have an awesome trip. You definitely DO NOT want to initiate a text convo with her while she’s away. Don’t do it. If she’s on vacation, let her start a text convo with you.
Strategy #3: Won’t She Forget About Me if I Don’t Keep Myself Fresh in Her Mind?
Nope. It may seem counterintuitive, but pulling back a bit and doing your own thing while she’s away will actually make her think about you more.
Like I said, if your strategy is to bombard her with texts and attempt to virtually hitch a ride on her trip, she’s going to feel smothered and lose interest.
Strategy #4: How Do I Keep the Spark Alive While She’s Gone?
Let’s say that she initiates a conversation with you while she’s on vacation. When that happens, enjoy some light banter about what you both are up to. That’ll keep the spark alive.
You’re showing interest without giving her the upper hand and signaling that you’re lost in this great, big world without her constant presence.
Another thing you can do is to send a photo of something that has to do with your shared interests or inside jokes you two have developed through rapport.
Strategy #5: What if You Don’t Hear From Her for Weeks?
If you haven’t heard from her in weeks, then there’s a good chance this relationship/potential relationship is a no-go.
There is one exception to this rule that I will mention at the bottom of the article, but if someone’s into you, they will — and should — respond to you.
If she doesn’t reach out while she’s on her vacation, it’s not the end of the world. She’s likely busy with daily activities, right? I get it – it still sucks.
BUT, no matter how bad that sucks, don’t respond by blowing up her phone or jumping to crazy conclusions (and VERBALIZING said conclusions via text or calls), like she fell in love with her Uber driver or something.
Spend time living your own life by going out with friends and — if you two are not exclusive — MegaDating while she’s away.
Strategy #6: Should I Text Her the Day Before She Gets Back to Set Up a Date?
Follow the tips I have listed thus far to make sure that you keep the spark going without disrupting her time away.
The day before she gets back, make some solid plans to get together that are compelling. Don’t simply say, “Let’s hang out when you get back,” or put the pressure on her by asking, “So is there anything you feel like doing when you get back?”
Use a TDL to give her a date idea that she basically can’t say “no” to. TDL is an acronym for the “Time, Date and Location” that serves as a date’s call-to-action. An example of asking a girl on a date by using a TDL would be:
“Hey [insert name of girl you’re dating here]. I remember you mentioning that you are thinking about adopting a dog now that you’ve gotten settled in your new apartment.
There’s going to be a Yappy Hour at [place that holds this] on Saturday, July 12 at 5 pm. How would you like to go with me and have a few craft brews while we meet some pups?”
Notice that, by using a TDL, you are showing consideration for her time by doing all the work for her. She doesn’t have to worry about doing a back-and-forth with you about getting reservations or coming up with a time that works for both of you. This type of consideration is super chivalrous, which women always appreciate.
The date idea is also compelling because it speaks to her interests and is also introducing her to a new experience.
When you use TDL and craft compelling date ideas that are tailored to a woman’s personality, you’re way less likely to get rejected and more likely to build chemistry with a potential long-term partner.
The last thing you want to do here — is to text her on her travel day. Always text her the day before you know she arrives home.
Strategy #7: Should I Text Her When She Lands?
Again, you don’t need to overplay your hand or send her a novella via text about how much you’ve missed her. You’ve sent your TDL and — hopefully — the rapport has continued while she was away.
Just simply confirm your next date one day before it occurs.
How to Make Her Miss You While She’s Away Wrap-Up:
Whether you’re feeling shaky about your current relationship, are currently single, or just want some personalized dating advice, I’m here to help. Since completing my 100-date experiment years ago, I’ve been helping men all over the world find fulfilling, long-term relationships.
We do this via our program, Dating Decoded.
Dating Decoded is designed to have you meet dozens of compatible women in short time.
We teach you how via our program’s four dating pillars:
- MegaDating (dating women simultaneously)
- Profile Creation (We’ll teach you how to create an amazing online profile that competes)
- MegaMessaging (You’ll need more than matches, you need to talk the talk as well)
- Dating Blueprint (The first three dates are paramount, we’ll walk you through how to get the most from them)
Our program involves a hybrid learning model that centers around two live strategy sessions a week as well as an online curriculum for you to learn at your own pace.
We also provide you with an online support group of men in your exact same position. Lastly, we offer mock dates for you to fine-tune the skills you learn in our class before dating out in the real world.
Head over to my calendar and book a new client 1-on-1 Zoom session with me today. During our session, we will discuss your dating goals and see if Dating Decoded is right for you.
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