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‘Freckling’ is a New Dating Trend & It’s Not as Cute as it Sounds

‘Freckling’ is a New Dating Trend & It’s Not as Cute as it Sounds

When I first saw that “freckling” was the name of a new dating trend, I was initially excited. As a redhead who burns easily in the sun (sidebar: I’m moving to Los Angeles in a few months, are there any places nearby that sell SPF 1,000 sunscreen? No? Ok…), freckles are a big part of my life. In the summertime, these brown spots pepper themselves across my skin in such rapid succession, I sometimes wonder if I’m going to be one giant freckle by August.

So I was thinking that maybe this new freckling dating trend was some kind of praise to redheads and other ivory-toned people who have to spend the warmer months choosing between getting a proper dose of Vitamin D and protecting their skin with an obscene level of SPF. But as most dating trends go, this was not the case at all. Freckling is just one more dating trend to groan about, alongside other frustrating fads like ghosting and R-bombing.

So What is Freckling, Exactly?

First coined by AskMen, freckling is a dating trend that involves a repeated, short-lived romance that occurs between two people only during the summer months. Basically, if there is someone you know that you seem to have a fling with in the summer time, only to have this romance devolve into nothing by autumn, there’s a good chance you’re being freckled.



The difference between freckling and a typical summer fling is that someone freckling you is usually someone that you know through mutual friends or acquaintances. This person is someone who comes in and out of your life repeatedly, making romantic moves in the summertime but likely disappearing during winter’s “cuffing season” to either shack up with someone else or simply remain aloof.

Why Does Freckling Occur?

Freckling tends to occur because according to some research, people are more interested in responding to dating messages and general interest in the summer. The theory behind this is that, after being cooped up all winter, people are ready to release some pent-up energy and get rid of that tension via things like freckling.

The days are longer, people are wearing less, margaritas are more plentiful, and friends are generally more out and about. For this reason, it makes sense that summer hookups and flings should occur.

The downside to freckling is that, if you’re looking for a relationship, you’re unlikely to hook a freckle. A freckle’s affections are strictly seasonal. Freckling is basically like ghosting, except the ghost keeps returning in a bathing suit every nine months.

What to Do When You Get Freckled

If you enjoy summer flings and aren’t looking for a serious relationship, enjoy freckling when it occurs and don’t think too much of it.

However, if you want to find a girlfriend or boyfriend, freckling can be extremely frustrating. And the fact that freckles are usually people that you met through mutual friends means that it’s going to be hard to avoid them during the summer.

So what can you do? I’ve got a few suggestions.

Freckling Tip #1: Avoid Getting Too Drunk Around the Freckle

Alcohol tends to flow pretty hard when it comes to the summertime. If you’re at a party that you know the freckle is going to be at, avoid going too hard on the Mai Tais and margaritas. Alcohol lowers inhibitions and leads to a lack of impulse control, which may have been what got you into trouble with the freckle in the first place.

Sip slowly and have plenty of water on hand.



Tip #2: Don’t Engage with the Freckle 

If you want to put an end to this seasonal cycle, simply focus on other friends at parties or events that your freckle is going to be attending. One thing you can do is tell a trusted friend about your frustration so that they are aware you need some support and happy distractions for when the freckle tries to make his or her move.

Tip #3: Be Straight Up About Your Feelings

freckling

If your freckle starts appearing either in person or via text during the summertime, you can simply let them know you’re not interested in another short-lived fling because you’re looking for a serious relationship.

Be prepared, however, I’ve known a few freckles in my day, and sometimes this type of honesty results in some reverse psychology. You suddenly become more desirable to the freckle because you rejected them and now they want to ramp up the summer romance even more. In fact, they may even suggest that they would like to start dating you.

Don’t fall for it. If this is someone who you have attempted to date and they have a history of being wishy-washy, it’s not worth your time. Chasing someone is exhausting and can lead to things like anxiety and lowered self-esteem.

Tip #4: Put Yourself Out There

freckling (1)

If you’ve been on a freckling merry-go-round for the past few seasons, ask yourself why you haven’t gotten off of it yet? Is it because you’re hoping that this person will come around and finally want a long-term relationship?

One of the biggest reasons people tend to settle for non-exclusive relationships or mistreatment when they are hoping to find a long-term partner is because we get fixated on “the one” instead of realizing that there is plenty of fish in the sea.

Put yourself out there by asking friends to set you up with someone who is looking for the same things as you and who they think you would be compatible with. Download a few dating apps like Bumble and Hinge and find a few different people to fill your social calendar and open you up to new experiences. Enjoy the summer weather by joining an adult sports league or Meetup group to help you get out and about and meet new people.

When you fill your calendar, put yourself out there and refuse to settle for someone who leaves you confused, you automatically increase your chances of finding a fulfilling relationship. More importantly, your summers become less frustrating and the only freckles you need to worry about are on your skin.

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