Body language is the quickest form of communication and largely influences how we are perceived by others. Nothing is more truthful than what our body language conveys. Hence the saying “the body never lies.” Female body language is no exception.
This is why it is so useful to know how to read a woman’s nonverbal cues, and to understand the signals that your body is giving off in dating.
Learning to read a woman’s body language is almost more important that speaking her language. This is because only seven percent of her communication with you is verbal. Studies show that thirty-eight percent of women’s communication comes from their tone of voice and up to fifty percent is expressed through body language.
Body language allows us to communicate authentically, regardless of what we’re saying. This means that you have to be even more aware of how your body language is coming across to her, than you do about what you say.
Body language can be broken down into the following categories: eye contact, posture, tone of voice, movement, touch, and facial expression. For each category, there are positive and negative body language cues that signal interest or disinterest.
A positive body language cue related to eye contact includes making and maintaining eye contact, which signals trust, rapport, and attraction. On the other hand, a negative body language cue such as a lack of eye contact, signals insecurity and distrust. Eye contact is critical, both for your in-person dates, as well as for the photos you choose to represent yourself on dating apps and online dating sites. The popular maxim, ” the eyes are the doorway to the soul,” reveals important insights into just how important good eye contact is for dating.
The posture of the body is equally important when reading body language. Factors such as the direction your feet point in, how much space you take up while sitting, how you move, and how far apart your feet are when standing, all convey important nonverbal information to the women you are dating. That said, let’s discuss an open versus closed body language posture, which can signal either trust and dominance, or insecurity and deceit.
When first meeting someone new, time is of the essence. It takes a woman only four to eight short seconds to determine whether she’s interested or not. You need to program her perception of you as comfortable and trustworthy immediately. The quickest way to do this is to make eye contact, smile and keep your body open in her direction.
Read on to learn the top 11 female body language types and signs you need to be aware of, along with some must do body language tips for men.
Her body is hardwired to desire the best view of the world when she is stimulated. This means that biologically, her brain communicates with her irises to allow for more light to enter into her visual field. Interestingly enough, men are also more attracted to women with bigger pupils making it a win-win for seduction.
If you’re counting, normal blinking rates are about 15 times per minute, women on birth control blink about 20 times. If you clock her in at 20 blinks per minute, make sure to man up and channel your inner bad boy. Women on the pill are drawn more to the tough and rugged look as well as strong, masculine features such as a square, wide jaw line. In this case, don’t be afraid to take a day off from shaving.
If you want to get her talking and socializing, slow down on buying drinks and put on an upbeat song or go somewhere with fast-paced live music.
Tell her that every time she does it she has to hold your hand. You can even make a game out of it. Joke around with her when she keeps going back to nail biting and tell her, “wow, you must really like me huh, tell you what, now every time you bite your nails you have to kiss me. My version of mistletoe.”
Stimulate her interest by explaining how women hold more warmth in the core of their bodies than men do and in order to warm her up, massaging her hands really won’t do much.
Instead, put your arms around her midsection and her whole body will heat up and pump blood into her extremities. If you’re really sly you can check the temperature and take her somewhere you know it’s going to be a little chilly, then instigate a little kinesthetic touch.
If she angles away from you, move on, she’s not interested and you don’t need to waste your time. Similarly, if she turns her torso away from you, she doesn’t agree with something you’ve said.
A woman that wants to know more will look you square in the eye without wavering much. You can also use this knowledge in work environments and social group settings. In conversation if a person has a hard time maintaining eye contact with you or seems restless, it’s either because you are talking too much or because you aren’t asking stimulating questions.
Sales people use this tactic to build trust with their clients. While gesturing they always make sure to keep their hands facing up, a sign of trust and sincerity.
The following tips have been studied by professional researchers and should always be applied while talking to women on a date or when you are engaging in social environments.
Having your legs spread apart means that you are displaying dominance in your environment. Being “closed” signals less dominance, a trait that high value women are not interested in.
Women are more attracted to dominant men because of their ability to provide safety and security. Their dominance also translates into the workplace in the form of power, making them more likely to be more well rounded and financially successful.
A woman’s number one priority, being safety and security, will cause her to naturally gravitate towards a man who is dominant. If you’re open, she’ll feel better about getting to know you and subconsciously notice even the smallest details. For instance if your toes point towards her, if your shoulders are back, whether or not your legs are apart while seated, whether you have a relaxed but upright posture, or if you display confident movements that are calm, direct and strong.
If you’re in a group setting and another man begins to speak, stop your hand gestures and listen to him. Do you agree with what he’s saying? Do you disagree? Make it difficult to tell whether you agree with him by adopting a pseudo poker face. This will subconsciously raise your social status by demonstrating that you’re not submissive.
This doesn’t mean, “show no emotion” or “always disagree” but be careful not to smile excessively and nod in agreement with everything another guy is saying.
Your ability to get up close and personal with anyone and everyone demonstrates your confidence and command of the room. This doesn’t mean you should be the creeper that slaps everyone’s back side but work on adding a little more contact to your social skills and you’ll be much more likely to engage her interest. According to recent studies, physical touch has even been proven to increase body temperature, giving you the power to literally make her hot.
Remember that your posture is something that you need to be consciously aware of at all times, even when she’s not around. Your muscle memory will get used to whatever you do most frequently, which means if you hunch over at your desk all day, you’ll end up hunching over on your date and she’ll just think you suck, not that you work a lot.
When she is smaller than you, with a similar health and fitness profile, the natural masculine/feminine dynamic can more easily be obtained. This means, she’ll be able to go to a place of vulnerability because she feels safe with you.
I hope this guide on female body language helps you understand my species a bit better. Need to learn more? Looking to reach other dating goals like finding a relationship this year? If so, I can help. Feel free to book a New Client Skype session with me today.
During our session, we’ll diagnose your dating history, discuss your future goals, create an action plan, and see if my 3 month coaching program is right for you!