She Rejected Me But Still Acts Interested. What Should I Do?
You’re thinking to yourself “She rejected me but still acts interested.” What a situation, right?
Guys, it’s true that there are innumerable fish in the sea.
Some are blue, some build sandcastles to attract mates, and some can never be forgotten.
After vomiting out how you’re obsessed with this woman, your buddies invariably tell you to forget about her, that there are plenty of fish in the sea.
While this might be good advice, to you it’s just a lazy, apathetic mantra provided by people that don’t understand the gravity of your feelings.
Sure it’d be great if you could swipe one or twice and magically forget about her, but that’s not how the heart works.
So what are you to do?
She Rejected Me But Still Acts Interested
Look, you’re not ready to move on, and she still acts interested, so let’s look at your options.
You could try to move on — which is advisable — or continue to flirt your way to your lady.
We’ll help you with the latter.
Put her in the friendzone of your mind.
Treat her like a friend, not like a girlfriend.
Don’t offer to pick her up, don’t pay for her dinner or drinks, don’t buy her gifts, and don’t offer to drive her home when it’s out of your way. Set a boundary in your mind and she’ll feel it too. This will protect you from feeling taken advantage of. Friendzoning her in your mind will also shift the energy in a way that she can feel and make her feel confused and competitive because she perceives that you’re no longer interested in her romantically.
It’s the classic push away.
The moment she feels that she’s been relegated to the friendzone she’ll realize that she’s been taking her place for granted. She realizes that she can’t just put you on the backburner.
Gauge how she’s treating you differently.
Kick-off this newfound friendship by laying out the situation. Tell her that you recognize that she doesn’t want to be anything romantic so that you’re going to befriend her. On the surface, you accept this situation. You not only treat her differently but also are seeing less of her.
If you notice her feelings towards you changing, acknowledge them and delicately remind her that you rejected her. When the moment is ripe, tell her that you’re not going to beg for a date and that if she really wants to go on a date with you, she has to be the one to ask you out.
This next move isn’t for the faint-hearted.
Add her on social media and post photos that show her how awesome your life is.
When she sees how dope your life is she’ll give pause and wonder if she made the right choice in friend-zoning you. If your life looks awesome, she’ll begin to imagine what her life would be like if she was a bigger part of yours. If what you’re up to looks amazing, she might rethink only being your friend.
Posting on SM also plays into the push-pull philosophy. She’ll feel left out and pushed away by being ostracized. Scrolling through her IG late at night she’ll see how kick-ass your life is without her. The bowling, the BBQs, the mini-golf, the sporting events, etc. This FOMO may be enough to convince her to slide into your DMs late at night.
Fill Up Your Social Calendar
It’s easy to friendzone her when she’s become an afterthought. But how do you make that happen?
Make yourself busy with lots of fun, social activities.
Try new things.
Join a co-ed sports team or meetup group, invite your friends to hang out more often, and do cool, new, adventurous activities when you do.
Spend more time with family and suggest new hiking trails, events, or activities that you can take photos of and post on social media.
Sitting at home binging The Office for the 7th time will inevitably lead you to hitting her up at 8 p.m. on a Friday night. Don’t be that guy. Fill the dopamine void left behind with friends, family, and new acquaintances.
O… ah, by the way.
A happy byproduct of getting out there and meeting new people is the opportunity to create new romantic connections.
Look, what your buddies say is true. There are a ton of fish in the sea. The best way to go fishing sometimes is to just enjoy yourself. Try new things and be open to new people. Should the chance to ask a woman out arise, take it.
You can both attempt to attract her and attempt to find a new ladyfriend at the same time.
It’s called MegaDating.
MeagDating is simply the act of dating multiple women simultaneously.
Ya see, the very best way to create distance between a woman and yourself is to place a few other women in between you and your former fling.
This romantic buffer zone makes you less eager to text her, to ask her out, and to think about her whenever you have a free moment. Not only does will this distance create sexual tension, but MegaDating will also help you meet new women.
Look, the female in question probably isn’t your soul mate.
This means that it’s best to not put all your eggs in one basket. I’m not saying you’ve completely given up on her. Hell, if it helps look at MegaDating as just a way to make her more attracted to yourself. Once she realizes you’re dating she may jump at the chance to not lose you.
While the desire to attract her might be the initial reason you MegaDate, it won’t be the most important. Soon enough you’ll realize that there are awesome women out there.
So to clarify, MegaDating involves dating not just one new woman every month. Nope, it’s about dating multiple women at the same time. I’m talking about drinks with Stacy Thursday, hiking with Jess Saturday, and then bowling with Gabby on Monday. Look, you’re the man, you just have to realize it.
When we team up I’ll show you how to mine for dates using dating apps, social events, friends, and other means to find compatible women worthy of dating.
MegaDating will not only chisel your dating skills, it’ll improve your confidence, and of course, cut down on the time it takes to find that special someone.
If you’re worried about finding enough woman to date or effectively building a connection with them — don’t. Hit me up to start discussing how you can get the most out of your dating life.
You are what you wear.
Dressing better and showing off your new wardrobe can quickly shift the way a woman perceives you.
If your clothes were baggy and old before, try working with a stylist from Stitch Fix, Trendy Butler, or Trunk Club and buy new clothes that fit your body exceptionally well. This will help her to view you in a more sexual/romantic way. Dressing well is a major component of sex appeal.
Focus On Self Improvement
It’s about time to ask the hard questions.
Was it a matter of you two simply being incompatible, or was it more than that?
Did she not like how complacent you were, your body physique, your clothes, how you treated her, your jokes, your lack to go out on Fridays, etc.?
There are a billion ways to improve yourself so as to make you more attractive.
The first involves figuring out your attachment style.
Are you anxious, avoidant, or secure?
Understanding your style will alter how you treat women. Working towards a secure attachment style will make you a more attractive romantic option.
But this isn’t the only way you can improve yourself.
Literally, any improvement will make you more attractive. Learning a new language, picking up a new hobby, or making new friends, will all boost your desirability. The key takeaway is to never be stagnant.
Talk It Out
Relationships live and die by conversation.
If you can’t properly articulate how you feel, you’ll never have a thriving relationship.
Before you broach your relationship, make sure the setting is right.
Ideally, pick a public, yet private place.
Tell her that she knows how you feel about her, but that you really want her to open up about how she feels about you. Tell her that you acknowledge that she rejected you, but that she is also acting interested.
Be straight with her while not turning her off. Don’t get angry or flustered. Bring levity to the conversation and be prepared for the worst.
Asking her to open up will give you valuable information. You’ll learn why she’s acting the way she is, if there’s still a chance, and ideally what triggered her to have these feelings.
This information will give you a roadmap you can follow.
Also, be ready for the relationship to shift. Tell her that you’re open to hearing her out. If she feels comfortable with you but isn’t ready for a serious relationships, she might just be looking for a friend with benefits. If you sense she’s thinking this way but is too timid to pop the question, ask her yourself.
Layout the situation, ask her if she’s on the same page, and pop the question.
Push & Hope For The Pull
Here are the facts: she rejected you but still acts interested.
If she’s truly still into you, pushing her away might pull her closer.
Here’s what you do.
Shoot her a text after the next time you two kick it.
Write her saying that you respect her decision to not be with you, but you’re not ready to see her in a platonic sense. Tell her that if she’s up for a date, you’ll let her be the one to contact you.
Look, this is risky, I get it.
But what you’re currently doing isn’t working for you.
It’s time to make some risky decisions if you want any progress to be made.
Don’t Take It Personally
It’s easy to come to the conclusion that there’s something wrong with you. That of course, she rejected you because there’s something inherently inadequate about you.
That’s one way to deal with rejection… it’s also the wrong way.
There are a dozen reasons why she rejected you but still acts interested.
She could not be ready for a boyfriend, be too busy as work, or is shopping around before she commits.
Being rejected doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. More precisely it just that she doesn’t think you’re the right fit for her at this point in her life. Is there something inherently wrong with a square peg being jammed into a round hole?
Rather, that square peg was never meant for that hole.
Framing your situation in this light will help you rebound and get back out there. It’ll also make you more receptive to putting yourself in situations where rejection is a possibility.
Always Go High, Never Low
If you want to keep your relationship with this woman alive, act gentlemanly, and adhere to the aforementioned advice.
What you don’t want to do is insult the woman that just snubbed you and burn the precarious bridge that you had spent so long building. Keep your wits about you and move forward in a cordial manner. Anything less will ensure the demise of your relationship.
“She Rejected Me But Still Acts Interested”… Now What?
Time to sit back, recline, and binge the rest of The Marvelous Mrs. Masiel ayoooo!!!
Well yes, binge a little, the show’s freakin’ amazing.
But once you’ve watched an episode or two, it’s time to take action.
And hey, I realize that putting the plan I just laid out into motion is difficult to do alone.
That’s why we should team-up.
Book a new client 1-on-1 Zoom session to learn more about how my coaching and matchmaking services can improve your dating life.
You’ll learn how to flirt with women, build sexual tension, mine for dates, ask women out via online dating, and much more. When it comes to matchmaking, my team will comb through your city sourcing nearly 1,000 candidates in order to find 15 women that are compatible with you.
Shall we begin?