Do me a quick favor — I guarantee you that it will be a fun 5 minute experiment.
Open your Tinder account (I know you have one).
Start swiping but be mindful of what people write in their profiles. Swipe for a minute or two and then get back to me.
What’d you see?
Most likely you viewed a myriad of barren profiles. Sure you saw a lot of decent pictures but rarely does a user write anything in their Tinder bio.
When they do it’s normally nothing more than their IG handle and a cliche line, something like, “I don’t know what I’m doing here” or “Was bored during the lockdown.”
This is because Tinder doesn’t require users to write bios or answer prompts. Seeing as how the only information you can derive from a profile comes from a user’s photos makes for a pretty superficial dating app leading to headlines such as this one:
Bumble on the other hand requires users to fill out at least three prompts.
Answering these prompts gives you the opportunity to put your personality on full display.
Female users aren’t gonna go out with a guy they know nothing about. These prompts give you a chance to showcase your personality and prove to her that she should choose to go on a first date with you over her Tuesday yoga class.
“I Guarantee You That” Bumble Prompt
The prompt we’ll be tackling today is the “I guarantee you that…” prompt.
This is a fairly open-ended prompt compared to others that really allows you to take it in any direction you want to.
When writing your own response to this prompt there are a few things you’ll want to keep in mind.
Every prompt response should do at least one of the following:
— Suggest a date idea
— Talk about a hobby
— Be humorous
— Showcase your personality
— Be original
If your response can do at least two of the aforementioned, then you’ve done your job.
1) What A Gentleman
What a catch you are.
Honestly, this response won’t make a woman swoon but in our modern times letting someone choose which series you’ll binge is more gentlemanly than buying a woman flowers.
Hey this space is for you to boast about how awesome you are (without coming off like an ass).
If you’re a gentleman, guarantee her of the fact, if you’re smart, funny, spontaneous, etc. this is your chance to demonstrate it.
2) The Road To Her Heart Is Paved With Cheese And Cured Pork
When crafting an I guarantee you that answer, feel free to be challenging.
Look, everyone’s a foodie nowadays.
Just take a look at Netflix and see how many food-related shows there are or swipe through Tinder and see how many women were compelled to write something about their affinity for tacos.
It’s true that nowadays the way to any woman’s heart is food.
This response does a few things well.
— It name drops a specific dish, signaling to Italian food lovers as well as Italian-Americans.
— It boasts that this user can cook better than an Italian grandmother.
— Lastly, it asks a question.
It’s this last feature that’s the best.
By asking the reader a question, you’re already engaging with her.
As you know, Bumble requires females to make the first move. The difficulty in coming up with an amazing first message discourages many women from messaging. Make it as easy an interaction as possible by reaching out to them and asking them a question in your profile.
3) Sweet Deal Brah
Applebee’s is a distinctly anti-millennial establishment.
Going to a chain restaurant for a first date — or even suggesting going to one — is suicide.
Unless you and your date are hardcore Ricky Bobby fans, it’s best to literally go anywhere else on a first date.
Here are some ideas to help you out.
This Bumble response should get a chuckle or two. That chuckle might be enough to get that oh-so-coveted swipe right.
Let’s also remember that not all Bumble answers need to be serious. You have three prompts you can answer. Penning a funny answer or two won’t cost you any points.
4) I Wanna Dance With Somebody! – Or Not
Here’s another Bumble response that speaks to our culture.
A key when responding to these questions is to make your answers timely and relevant. Doing so will give them more punch.
One thing I like about this response is that it ends open-ended.
As if the user doesn’t want to make Tik Tok dance videos but is open to being persuaded.
This can be good in that it casts a wider net, however, don’t be afraid to be polarizing and scare a certain type of Bumble user away.
Your goal isn’t to attract every woman on Bumble, rather only those that you’re compatible with.
5) That’s What He Said
Saying that you like The Office on a dating app has become cliche.
However, most people will only acknowledge their love and move on. This user on the other hand makes a promise, lets it be known that he’s a super fan, and is already talking about a first date.
Always steer the conversation towards a first date.
That is of course what dating apps should lead you to.
Dating apps aren’t mediums for dating. Rather they are introduction platforms that introduce you to someone in the hopes that you might have a romantic connection with them in the future.
But of course, the only way for you to know is to ask them out.
6) So That’s Where You Draw The Line Eh?
This response starts off all cute and cliche.
“I guarantee you that I’ll always listen…” I can almost hear the awws.
However, it quickly takes a quick turn and clearly makes it known that the user will stop listening when she starts talking about batshit crazy conspiracy theories.
This spin isn’t just funny, it broadcasts that the user is clearly not a QAnon supporter not willing to put up with conspiracy BS.
Such an answer hits home with a lot of women.
7) Boast About It
There’s no shame in boasting on dating apps.
As long as you’re not being gauche, listing achievements or talking about abilities is perfectly fine.
This user walks that fine line by talking about their skills before changing things up and injecting levity into the response.
Humor + being a badass is always a winning combination when answers the “I guarantee you that” bumble prompt.
8) Good Guy
This is one of my biggest pet peeves.
Sometimes I’ll tell Alexa to play a song or put my jam on in the car and someone will change the song before it’s finished.
To me, this is tantamount to cutting someone else off mid-sentence.
Guaranteeing to never be the culprit of a pet peeve is a worthy Bumble prompt.
9) Cut That Cheese
At first, this response feels like taking a walk down a street you have been down before.
Yet suddenly it takes a spontaneous turn to France, one that involves dining on the best cheese in Europe and fine red wine.
Not a bad detour.
Women love to dream and visualize. This I guarantee you that answer delivers like a grand slam would in the bottom of the ninth when you’re down by 3. Yeah, my boyfriend is a huge baseball fan.
10) Be A Man
Chivalry isn’t dead, it just looks different.
This is kinda cute in a cheesy sense, but it also touches a nerve with women.
A woman wants you to be a gentleman and stick up for her.
If she’s a commuter she’ll understand just how annoying it is when someone thinks their bad is a sentient object in need of a seat.
11) Thank You Jesus – Or Steve
For some reason, a lot of people are ticked off by this.
I personally don’t mind, but some (a fuck-ton) of other people do.
Assure her that you’ll never leave 3 seconds on the clock and walk away.
Who knows, if you can guarantee to be this courteous who knows what else you can offer.
12) Thank You Jesus – Or Dave
Here’s another pet peeve so common it might not even be a pet peeve anymore.
There are few things more frustrating than having someone hover over you as you perform a task on a cpu. This user understands how annoying this can be and promises to never be THAT guy.
13) Finally!
Coffee on a first date is nearly as cliche as starting a dating app conversation with “hey.”
Coffee isn’t stimulating, won’t get her excited to see you, and has been done before.
Here are just a few first date ideas that are better than getting coffee:
— Rock climbing!
— Mini-golf
— Bowling
— Axe throwing
— Speakeasy/Secret bar/coffeeshop
— Romantic walk at sunset
— Beach picnic
— Any activity that she’s into
First dates are make-or-break moments.
Thing is, to even get to a first date you’ll have to ask her on a cool enough TDL to actually get her out of the house.
By the way, TDL stands for: time, date, location.
When you ask a woman out you should specify all that information.
It looks something like this: