If there’s a woman you’re interested in but you’re unsure of her feelings for you, you’ve come to the right place. In general, women prefer men to approach them first when it comes to getting asked out on a date. Unfortunately, this can make it difficult for guys to discern between a woman’s generally friendly demeanor and the signs she wants you to notice her.
Some women can be extremely transparent and will make it obvious they like you through flirting and other signs. But some of the signs aren’t so conspicuous. That’s why I decided to offer 25 signs she wants you to notice her, ranging from the completely transparent to the opaque.
Sign #1: She Laughs At All Your Jokes…or Any Time
If a girl is feeling giddy around you, it’s understandable that she would get a case of the giggles. If you are in a group and she wants to make a point of paying attention to what you’re saying and almost seems to find reasons to laugh at things you’re saying as if you’re John Mulaney, then it’s one of many signs she wants you to notice her.
Sign #2: She Plays With Her Hair
I can’t explain exactly what it is about liking a guy that causes a woman’s hands to glide hummingbird-style up to twirl her locks into curlicues, but it happens pretty much 100% of the time. If a girl is constantly playing with her hair when she sees and talks to you, it’s another one of my surefire signs she wants you to notice her.
Sign #3: Eye Contact
Sure, many people make eye contact as a polite way to signal that they are listening to you and also as a way to show professionalism. But when someone is looking into your eyes and basically gazing at you, it probably means that they are attracted to you and want you to notice them. A girl who is looking at you intently wants to hear everything you have to say and, if you return her gaze, she may briefly look away and smile out of nervousness.
If you like the girl, make sure that you return her eye contact to reciprocate the attraction. In fact, doing so can escalate the chemistry between you two.
According to Psychology Today, mutual eye contact releases a neurochemical known as oxytocin, which is the hormone associated with falling in love. The article goes on to note that the release of this hormone causes pupil dilation, so take notice of how wide her pupils are when looking into her eyes. If they’re nice and dilated, consider her smitten.
Sign #4: She Breaks the Touch Barrier
By touch, I don’t mean anything aggressive. She doesn’t have to plop herself down on your lap to be sending you signs she wants you to notice her — of course, if she does sit on your lap, you can definitely assume she likes you.
When a woman wants you to notice them but isn’t sure if you reciprocate their interest, they may find excuses to touch innocuous areas, like your shoulder, arm or the small of your back. She also may give you a hug when saying hello and goodbye.
Sign #5: She Stands Close to You
The way she positions her body toward you can be a big indication of her feelings. If a woman likes you, she wants to be closer to you. She may lean into you when you’re talking or make sure to stand next to you when you’re in a group.
Conversely, if she is always keeping her distance, it can be a sign that she’s not feeling it.
Sign #6: She Mirrors You
Mirroring is when someone unconsciously positions themselves in a way similar to you and mimics your movements. This is a huge sign of attraction and also can indicate compatibility.
Sign #7: She Gets Nervous Around You
It’s completely normal to get nervous around someone you want to notice you. Ask yourself if she exhibits the following nervous traits when she’s around you:
- Laughing really loudly
- Shaking hands
- Stumbling speech
- Talking at a volume that is abnormally loud for her
- Her voice gets high when she’s around you
- She looks at you, then glances away, looks at you, then glances away, looks at you, and then — well, you get the point
- Plays with or crumples things, like napkins, cups or straws
Sign #8: She Looks Bummed When Another Girl Flirts With You
Sign #9: She Wants to Spend Time With You
Inviting you to hang out with her, wanting to make sure you get invited to mutual friends’ events, following you around, and always being sure to RSVP to any invitations you extend are all signs she wants you to notice her and of course ask her out soon.
Sign #10: She’s Always Dressed to Impress
You’ve seen her in other situations and in photos where she keeps her style rather lowkey. But whenever you’re around, she’s sure to have her hair and makeup done and is wearing a killer outfit. This is a big sign she wants you to notice her.
Sign #11: She Finds Reasons to Talk to You
How was your mom’s birthday last week? How did that open mic go? Are you still liking your new job? Is that a new haircut? Is that a new shirt? Oh, you’ve had that shirt since college? Oh, I’ve seen you in that same shirt a thousand times before? My bad…
See what I did there?
If a girl wants you to notice her, she will find any reason to start a conversation with you, even if it leaves her grasping at straws.
Sign #12: She Needs Your Help
That jar she’s trying to open? It’s sealed as tight as King Tut’s tomb. Do you know how to kill spiders? She really needs some advice. Maybe you can come over to her apartment later and help her out.
If a girl is in a crisis (or something that she can conveniently paint as a crisis) she’s gonna wanna call on the guy she’s attracted to, not the one she put in a friend-zone.
Now that you’ve learned about the signs she wants you to notice her, let’s talk about what you can do about it.
Sign #13: She Draws Attention to Her Mouth
Whether consciously or unconsciously, a woman who wants you to notice her will draw attention to her mouth. Maybe she’s rampantly reapplying chapstick, touching her lips or flirtatiously sipping from a straw.
Licking or biting her lips can also be a subtle sign that she wants you to notice her and is thinking about kissing you.
Sign #14: You Make Her Blush
Blushing is a surefire sign you make her nervous (in a good way) and she wants you to notice her. Pay attention to her complexion during conversation and see if her cheeks redden when you make her giggle or if some non-cosmetic rouge appears as she nervously turns away from you.
Sign #15: She Looks Back at You
Maybe you’re hanging out in a group and it’s time for everyone, or at least a few people, to make an exit. Pay attention to whether or not she looks after you as you’re leaving or looks back at you when she’s headed to her car.
This is a definite sign that she wants you to notice her. Likely, she is even hoping that you’ll escort her back to her car. Make sure to offer!
Sign #16: She Gets a Case of Dragon Nostrils
If you notice that her nostrils are flaring and that her breathing is heavier than normal, there’s a chance that you are making her nervous and she wants you to notice her. Maybe you told a joke that sent her into a fit of giggles that makes her seem like she’s on the cusp of hyperventilating.
In that case, hand her a paper bag she can breathe into and promptly ask her out using the strategies I suggest at the end of this article.
Sign #17: She Asks You Sexually Explicit Questions
“Have you done any manscaping today?”
“Do you have any fries with that shake?”
“Will you have sex with me?”
All of these questions — and ones that reside in the same type of aggressive arena — are more than a bit odd, but I’m not one to fault a woman for being bold.
If she starts asking you very sexually explicit questions, she probably wants you to notice her…and make your move.
Sign #18: She Cups Her Face
If a girl frames her face with both of her hands, it’s a sign that she is feeling giddy around you. She may also be trying to hide the fact that she’s blushing.
This is definitely a sign she wants you to notice her.
Sign #19: She Does Her Little Turn on the Catwalk
When she walks up to you, does she strut as if she’s trying to do her little turn on the catwalk, yeah, on the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah — well…you get the point.
Pay attention to how she approaches other people versus how she approaches you. If she seems to find her inner model every time she steps to you, there’s a chance she wants you to notice her.
Sign #20: Her Legs Turn Into a Genie Lamp
If she starts rubbing different parts of her body — legs, neck, etc. — it’s a sign that she wishes you would touch her in a similar way.
Sign #21: She Plays With Her Jewelry
This is similar to a girl playing with her hair. If she fiddles with rings and earrings around you — and not other people — it’s a sign she is nervous and is hoping that you’ll notice her.
Sign #22: She Wants to Know Everything About You
Have you ever been on a date where you can’t get a word in edgewise because the person you’re with is droning on and on about themselves and ONLY themselves?
Yeah, we’ve all been there and it sucks.
But with a girl who really wants you to notice her and has a big crush on you, what she really wants is to keep you talking. She likes you, which means she wants to get to know everything she can about you — and even the most mundane facts about your life are straight up fascinating to her.
When you’re chatting, she will ask follow-up and open-ended questions to learn more about you in order to keep the conversation going.
Sign #23: Enthusiastic Nodding
Piggybacking off of sign #22 is enthusiastic nodding. If she wants you to notice her, her eyes will be bright, her smile wide and she will nod enthusiastically at the things you have to say.
Sign #24: She Follows You on Every Social Media Platform
Did she send you friend requests, follow you on SnapChat, Twitter and Instagram almost immediately after you met? This is a possible sign she wants you to notice her.
Sign #25: She Likes Your Status Updates and Photos
If she’s always one of the first to like or comment on a status update or photo, there’s a chance she wants you to notice her.
What to Do
Well, what are you waiting for? If she’s showing you any of the signs from above, and you’re attracted to this girl, it’s time to ask her out on a date.
Make sure that you pick a time where it’s just the two of you and make it very clear that the date you want to take her on is romantic. If this is someone you’ve known a while and already hung out with, it’s important to make the distinction between your platonic experiences and how you want to interact moving forward.
Think about your shared interests and how you can incorporate that into a compelling date idea. Make sure that the date has a clear TDL (i.e., a specific time, date, and location) to ensure that there’s no confusion about where to meet. Using a TDL shows that you’re a good planner and also prevents the two of you delaying the date as you go back-and-forth about where and when.
And remember, even if she has been giving you crazy signals that she’s into you, don’t get lazy just because you have the upper hand. If you like this girl, make the date special and don’t treat it like every other time the two of you have hung out.
If you’re unsure of how to move forward, refer to my dating blueprint for the first three dates:
- The first date should be no longer than an hour, cost no more than $10-$15, and should take place during the daytime (preferably on a Saturday, between 11 am and 2 pm). The purpose of the first date is to build trust and rapport. Don’t forget to check out my First Date Tips For Men article for ideas on how to crush the first date.
- The second date should be active and free. The purpose of the second date is to escalate sexual attraction.
- You can go all out with a fancy dinner on the third date. The purpose of the third date is to establish if the two of you are a good fit when it comes to morals and values.
By following this blueprint, you can allow things to build naturally and prevent yourself from rushing a relationship before you’ve established whether or not you two are truly compatible.
Let’s say that this girl who wants you to notice her agrees to go on a date with you. That’s awesome! With my dating blueprint in hand, you should be good to go.
However, for optimal dating success, don’t let this burst of excitement lead you to putting all your eggs into one basket. What I mean is, make sure that you keep your options open until you have established whether or not you want to commit to an exclusive relationship with this person.
MegaDating is a strategy that involves dating several different women at the same time in order to diffuse your energy by keeping your social calendar full. When you MegaDate, you avoid settling for the mediocre or chasing after “the one” because you consistently see that there is a lot of fish in the say.
Moreover, MegaDating elicits an unconscious sense of competition in potential partners, so you’ll have women chasing you instead of the other way around.
During my 100-date experiment, I used MegaDating to find a compatible, long-term partner. It worked for me and it can work for you, too!
Wrap-Up: Signs She Wants You To Notice Her
Do you want more gorgeous women to notice you? Are you ready for lasting love? If so, I’m here to help.
Head over to my calendar and book an introductory session with me today. During our session, we will create an action plan — tailored to your needs — to help you overcome your dating roadblocks and stay out of the friend-zone for good!
*Note: This article was recently updated (October 2018) to include additional content to help you reach your dating goals.