We’ve spent our entire lives reading the signs.

Part of our ability to read attraction is innate while the other part was learned while watching romantic models such as our parents and siblings. But signs of shallow attraction and signs that she wants a serious relationship with you are two completely different things. 

A hand on the leg or lingering eye contact from across the room signal sexual attraction. But the desire to enter into a long term relationship that may well define the rest of your life isn’t indicated with a swift brush of the hair or kiss on the neck. 

All the signs you read during your formative years may not have made you romantically literate enough to read these signs that she wants a serious relationship with you. 

Signs She Wants a Serious Relationship with You

1. She Asks If You’ve Deleted You’re Dating Apps

If you don’t drink alcohol, there’s absolutely no reason to have the Mixologist app on your phone. You’re doing your best not to drink but with an app like that lurking behind your lock screen, you can easily give in to temptation. If you’re serious about giving up drinking, this app actively works against you. The same goes for dating apps.

If you were serious about the person you’re dating, why would you have dating apps on your phone? Erasing a dating app is a clear indication that you aren’t actively looking, rather, you’ve already found a meaningful partner.

She might not come out and explicitly ask if you’ve deleted your dating apps. Doing so may inadvertently provoke “the talk.” If she’s too afraid to have the talk -for fear that you might reject her- she’ll try to figure out if you’ve erased the app without revealing her desire for an exclusive relationship. 

Pay attention to any subtle hints that she’s deleted the app you may have met on. She may try to cheekily broach the conversation because a friend of hers has seen you on the app. If you’re serious about this person, don’t let a friend of hers find you on the app and notify her. Rather, delete the app even if you’re not ready to have the relationship talk with her. 

2. Habits Changes

She used to hang out with her girlfriends every Saturday night. But recently, that’s begun to change. Instead of getting drinks with her buddies, she’s shifted her focus to you. Now she wants to make you a fixture in her weekend plans. 

Changing habits is no easy feat. As humans, we feel ensconced in our habits and only change them once sufficiently motivated. Choosing you over her friends is a sign that you’re moving up in her list of priorities. 

3. She Asks If You Want To Get Married/Have Children

Depending on who you’re dating this might be a question that arises on a second or third date. Perhaps she knows what she wants and doesn’t want to invest in someone whose familial goals don’t align with hers. But even if this question comes early in the relationship, it means that she could imagine a future with you. If there was no initial connection she probably wouldn’t even care to pop the question.  

If a number of dates or months have gone by without having broached the topic of marriage and children, she’s either not interested in creating a family right now, isn’t very futuristic, or potentially not interested in a serious relationship with you. Age is also a variable here. 

All in all, having an in-depth discussion regarding starting a family can be interpreted as an obvious sign that she wants a serious relationship with you. 

4. She Wants To Vacation With You… Again

Vacations are costly, time-consuming, and finite. Trips to the beach or abroad that require taking time off from work are the most meaningful and looked forward times of the year. Despite having just vacationed to Cape Cod she insists on booking tickets now for your next adventure. 

Wanting to spend vast amounts of alone time together is a clear indication of her feelings for you. Not only this but as I said, vacation is costly, time-consuming and finite. She’s not going to want to take cherished vacation time off from work with just anyone. 

5. Financial Investment

There are two types of relationship investments that indicate interest. One is concerned with that of time and the other pertains to money. The more time and money she spends on you the more she likes you, simple. But if there’s an imbalance, you’ve got to keep an eye out. 

Perhaps she’s only spending time with you because you’re the only one footing the bill for your adventures. Of course, she’s going to respond in the affirmative to dine out at some ritzy French restaurant when she knows you’ll be the one reaching for his wallet when the bill arrives. That’s why you should stick to the MegaDating blueprint. 

You’ll really know that she’s leaning towards a serious relationship with you when she begins to financially invest in you. She’s buying dinner for the both of you, purchasing tickets to events, surprising you with gifts, and buys the groceries so that you two can cook dinner at your place Friday night. 

For more tips on this sub-topic check out my article on Paying for Dates Etiquette for Guys.

6. She’s Not Afraid To Take Her Makeup Off Around You

I’ll let you in on a girls-only secret. 

Women will subconsciously test a man’s staying power by taking off her makeup and observing his reaction. If he acts weird, he’s not going to be able to deal with the real her. This Marilyn Monroe quotes sums up our feelings best, “If you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.” 

Look, we’re not going to always wear makeup around you. Sans makeup is how we wake up every morning, it’s what we look like during lazy Sundays. If you can’t accept your lady without makeup, she won’t ever want a serious relationship with you. 

Be ready for when this test comes. Sure it’s a sign she’s into you, but it’s also an exam that you can’t afford to fail. 

7. She Talks About Going To The Pound

As far as millennials are concerned a dog might as well be as good as a child. For whatever reason, young adults prefer dogs to children. Perhaps the costs associated with caring for a child are too much, or the responsibility is too heavy, or maybe millennials just prefer to fetch to cleaning diapers. Whatever the case is, if she asks you to get a dog with you, you’re in, long term. 

Adopting a dog is a 10-15 year commitment that is nearly as time-consuming as caring for a child. Getting one together is a link between the two of you that isn’t easily broken.

This commitment will interweave your lives for many years to come. Before even considering adopting a pet, you two should probably have the relationship talk. Having her broach the idea of adopting is the perfect segue to talking about your relationship. 

8. She Asks If You’re Dating Anyone Else

The pivotal moment in your relationship just arrived. She wants clarification. What are you two? Do you see her as an ephemeral romance or is she someone you want to date long-term? Dating someone else means that you haven’t put all your eggs in one basket. It shows that you haven’t fully committed to her. 

The answer to this question shouldn’t be simple. If you want to sustain a relationship with the woman that asked you, you’ll need to clarify some things. If you are dating multiple women, tell her why.

The more important she is the more likely it is that you’ll need to promise to put an end to your promiscuous ways and saddle up. Whether you’re dating more than one person or not, she deserves the truth.

Don’t waste your or her time by leading her on. Tell her about MegaDating and why dating multiple people is right for you. If you are ready to commit to her, be forthright and put your feelings on the line. On the other side of fear, there is a reward. 

9. She Asks To Meet Family & Friends

This doesn’t necessarily mean she wants a serious relationship with you. Rather, it means she’s willing to investigate as to whether a long-term relationship is right for you two. It’s a step into the direction of a serious relationship, just not a full-on leap. 

She understands that your friends and family are going to stick around for the long haul. Naturally, she understands that if she chooses to be with you, she isn’t just choosing you, but your friends and family as well. If you were just some dude that she wanted to sleep with, she wouldn’t care about getting to know those closest to you. 

10. She Mentions Moving In Together

This is the big one. 

Any discussion about a shared future together is more than hinting that she wants a serious relationship with you. But there are few more salient signs that she’s into you without than expressing a desire to move in together. Clearly, she wants to spend as much time with you as possible. Having you to herself every weekend isn’t enough for her. 

If she attempts to casually insert the idea of living in a shared space, don’t let it pass by. Address it while the desire is hot. 

11. She Drops The L Bomb

Ding, ding, ding!

There couldn’t be a clearer sign that she wants a serious relationship with you than by dropping the L-word. But before you get all excited let’s think about this. If “I love you” seems to come early or out of the blue, be leery. She might have an attachment disorder. 

Our attachment styles are shaped during childhood. Each interaction with our family and friends is carved into our psyche. A parental figure that showers you with love one day while rejects your touch the next will lead to the development of an anxious attachment style. 

Despite throwing the word on the kitchen table like a pot of gold for all to marvel at, she may not, in fact, love you. Don’t let the shiny appeal of those words fool you.

While her intentions may be right, you need to question why she’s saying these words without having given you any prior signs that she sees you as a long term partner. Perhaps she’s just leaning on you for all her emotional needs because she’s going through a taxing epoch or is new in town. 

Before jumping for joy, rewind and look for signs that she’s into you. If the signs are there, then the words are genuine. 

12. She Brings Up The Exclusive Talk

There are signals and then there are demands. Men and women both avoid explicitly expressing their desires because they don’t want to get turned down. This is why so many men ask women out to nebulous dates in the undefined future. This is also why she tells you she has a boyfriend instead of outright refusing to give you her number. We do our damndest to avoid rejection, but everyone gets to the point where they just need to know how the other person feels. 

The relationship talk is when she puts all her feelings on the line. If she’s the one broaching the talk, then clearly it’s she that wants to bring the relationship to the next level. 

Signs She Wants a Serious Relationship with You, Wrap:

Reading the signs isn’t what it used to be. You used to know when a girl liked you because she’d write you a note or you’d hear about it through the grapevine. But those adolescent days are long gone.

To understand her intentions you might now need a more discerning eye. Book a 1-on-1 New Client Skype Session with me to talk about how you can advance your romantic relationship. Via my 3 month Signature Program, I’ll teach you the tools you need to become a successful dater and ultimately find the romantic partner you’ve been looking for.