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She Broke My Heart and Then Left Me, What Should I Do Now?

She Broke My Heart and Then Left Me, What Should I Do Now?

She broke my heart and then left me — what should I do now?

It pains me to hear this question.

And, as a dating coach, it’s a question I receive often. Heartbreak is a tragic inevitability in life. Unless you’re one of the lucky few, a girlfriend or boyfriend will break your heart at some point.



I’ve been through it. You have likely been through it. Most of my male clients have experienced it.

But as difficult as heartbreak is, going through this type of pain doesn’t need to hold you back from finding lasting love.

Heartbreak doesn’t have to hinder your dating goals. Take a look below for some of my expert strategies on how to heal and put yourself out there.

Give Yourself Time to Heal

she broke my heart and then left me

Before you can dip your toes back into the dating pool, you need to allow yourself time to heal. You don’t want to throw yourself back into dating when you are fresh out of a relationship where you find yourself saying, “She broke my heart and then left me.”

Dating when your heart is broken is going to lead to you rebounding and attempting to stifle painful feelings. In reality, you can’t get around pain when it comes to heartbreak. You have to go through those feelings and allow yourself to be sad. But don’t worry, after doing that, you’ll come out on the other side as a stronger, more confident person.

I suggest the following things to help you heal post-breakup:

  • Take two weeks to do whatever you want. Mope, binge-watch standup comedy or your favorite show and allow yourself to be sad.
  • Book two appointments with family each week. Too much alone time gives way to things like rumination, which is detrimental to your emotional health.

It’s okay if it takes you a while to recover. Polls suggest it takes around 3.5 months to heal from a breakup but that all depends on how long you two were together, how it ended, and how much you cared for this person. Recognize that everyone is different and that it doesn’t matter how long it takes to get over her, everyone’s path to feeling normal again is valid and unique.

Avoid Things Like Alcohol and Binge Eating

she broke my heart and then left me

It’s very easy to turn to unhealthy habits like binge drinking and junk food when you’re going through a breakup.

I’m not saying you should leave yourself feeling totally deprived, but these things are only going to act as a band-aid when it comes to your heartbreak. You may feel better for a night or even a day, but the depression and anxiety will come rushing back stronger than before.



Remember that alcohol is a depressant. You can get hammered and forget about your ex for one night but what happens the next morning? Moreover, numbing yourself out to feelings prevents you from actually dealing with them. This can extend the grieving process.

Similarly, loading up on junk food and crying “she broke my heart and then left me” into a bag of chips isn’t going to make the breakup any easier.

Use your breakup as an opportunity to grow and move forward as a healthier, more confident person.

Join Healthy Communities

It’s tough to get back up after your heart has just been ripped out of your chest.

Join a community that will offer the support you need to heal.

In our program, Dating Decoded, we provide students with lifetime memberships where they not only learn the ins and outs of dating but are able to bond with coaches and like-minded single men who know exactly what you’re going through.

Our students band together to meet up in person to form new friendships, to become accountability buddies, and to cheer one another on and offer support as they go from single to in a relationship.

Students also offer support to one another via the Man Cave which is a biweekly event where our male students come together to talk about what’s on their minds, listen to one another, offer compassion, and support one another through difficult times.

Exercise Daily

she broke my heart and then left me

As little as 45 minutes of exercise per day can work wonders when it comes to anxiety and depression.

If you’re not big on exercise, start small. Take a walk each day, jog lightly or go hiking.

When you’re in a serious relationship putting effort into your appearance through things like exercise isn’t always a priority. But now that you’re single, it’s time to focus on rebuilding your confidence and getting prepared to reenter the dating world. Exercise is a big part of that.



Along with working out more often, make sure you’re eating a healthy, balanced diet. When your heart is broken, you’re going to naturally experience sadness and fatigue. But we all have daily responsibilities at work and home that need to be maintained. Fuel yourself with healthful foods to give you energy so that you don’t experience setbacks in other areas.

If you don’t know where to begin, consider talking with our fitness coach Aundrea. Aundrea is an award-winning bodybuilder who creates tailor-made workout and nutrition plans for our students.

Reflect on Your Part in the Breakup

she broke my heart and then left me

I don’t want you to beat yourself up over your breakup. Blaming one’s self during times of heartache is common but it isn’t helpful.

On the other hand, it’s important to analyze mistakes that were made in the relationship as you move forward.

What caused the breakup?

Did you cheat? Were you insecure during the relationship? Did your girlfriend feel like you were too clingy?

To give you a bit more structure when reflecting on what went wrong and what you want in a future relationship I recommend using the 7 Levels Deep Exercise. This exercise was designed by Dean Graziosi and aims to understand the root of the problem.

To being, start by asking yourself why you two broke up. 

The next question should dive deeper and continue to address why you two broke up until you have a better understanding of why it happened. Understanding the situation is the best way to recover, have compassion for another individual, and move on.

Reflect on Her Part in the Breakup

she broke my heart and then left me



She broke my heart and then left me, is a statement that indicates the breakup wasn’t your choice. Thus, you presumably are the one left in the greatest state of grief.

But people break up for several reasons. Even when you weren’t the one to initiate the breakup, it’s important to remember that the relationship wouldn’t have ended if it was the right one for you.

At the end of the day you two weren’t that compatible. It’s possible this breakup freed you from a relationship that was less than ideal.

If it helps, also go through the 7 levels deep exercise here as well.

Discover New Hobbies

Being single frees up your schedule. Take advantage of this free time by exploring passions and trying out new hobbies. This will distract you from feelings of upset and help you build your confidence.

One thing I highly recommend trying out (at least once) is an improv comedy class. Improv comedy classes are designed to get you out of your shell, provide a nonjudgmental atmosphere and are a great for increasing your confidence and discovering new talents within yourself.

New hobbies are great ways to make friends, expand your social circle, and yes, even meet single women.

If you had been dating someone for a long time, you may not be privy to all the different ways you can meet women. Sometimes men relegate all their pursuits to the bar scene, but there are several different ways to meet women, including:

  • Through mutual friends
  • Social media sites like Facebook
  • Group exercise classes
  • Adult sports leagues
  • At speed dating events

she broke my heart and then left me

MegaDate When You’re Ready

Once you have healed and feel ready to get back out in the dating world, I recommend you start MegaDating. MegaDating is the top dating strategy I recommend to all of my single male clients. I used it to find lasting love and you can do the same!

So what is MegaDating anyway?

MegaDating is a dating process that involves going out with several people at the same time in order to diffuse energy and keep your calendar full. When you MegaDate, you see that there truly are plenty of fish in the sea, which keeps you from settling for the mediocre.

MegaDating also helps you work on your dating strategy so that you get really good at approaching women.



This dating strategy isn’t about sneaking around or sleeping with a bunch of women. In fact, whether or not you have sex with anyone you’re seeing is completely up to you when you MegaDate. By going out on dates with lots of different people at the same time, you are simply able to accomplish your dating goals at a faster rate.

The process of MegaDating allows you to build confidence, learn more about what you want in a partner and guides you toward the right person faster than dating one person at a time.

Our goal is to have students date 9-12 women in a 90-day period. In this period, you will compare and contrast these women in order to ultimately choose the best possible partner. MegaDating doesn’t just help you find a partner, but rather helps you find the best possible partner for you.

Use Modern Dating Tools to Your Advantage

In order to MegaDate, you’re going to have to find women to go out with, obviously. I always recommend that my clients use modern dating tools to their advantage by downloading five dating app.

39% of all new relationships start online. This means using dating apps to meet women is an absolute must. In our program, we’ll show you the ins and outs of dating apps.

Dating Decoded

Interested in learning how we here at emlovz can help you?

We teach our students the shortcut to finding their ideal match by MegaDating. MegaDating is our dating philosophy and it shapes everything we teach here at emlovz. Simply put MegaDating is dating prolifically with the specific goal of going on 20 dates in 90 days. This will give you ample women to compare and contrast so you can refine your not only your dating skills but who your ideal partner is.

To teach you how to quickly find highly compatible women in just weeks and become the most eligible bachelor in town you’ll have a team of romantic experts, each skilled in their own unique area to support you.

Our Team

  • Emyli (me), co-founder, curriculum developer, head coach, and I host two coaching sessions every week
  • Thomas, co-founder, and coach. He’ll lead the biweekly Man Cave event where men come together to talk dating, bond with one another, and support other single men
  • Cat, Brooke, and Audrey are mock date specialists. Go on a practice date with them (and receive feedback) before your next date
  • Hailey is your new stylist. She’s worked with celebs from every industry and is now about to raid your closet
  • Tilly is our holistic sex & intimacy coach. She’ll help you get the most out of your sex life so you and your partner are happier between the sheets
  • Aundrea is an award-winning fitness coach. Are you ready to eat right and build muscle?
  • Mia is our social media expert. Revamp your Facebook and Instagram profiles with her help and start meeting women online

Our Community

And look, we realize that the single life can be difficult. If accepted into our coaching program, Dating Decoded, you’d be joining a community of supportive men and coaches who are there to listen, support, and encourage you as you navigate the single life.

Our program offers every student a lifetime membership (as if you’ll need it) so the support won’t stop until you’ve found your ideal partner.

If you’re ready to find your forever partner, book a Zoom session with our team today. Together we’ll talk about your dating history, your goals and show you how our program, Dating Decoded, can help you find your ideal partner.

Learn how our students have already improved their dating lives.



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