Anyone that’s ever experienced a breakup (so literally everyone) often compares the feeling of missing their ex to going through withdrawal.

We’ve all heard the analogies before.

While we might be tired of the cliche, in every romantic cliche about unrequited love we find more than a grain of truth.

A breakup is like having your heart ripped out, it’s like a smoker abruptly quitting smoking, it’s like a cocaine addict putting an end to their drug use cold turkey. It’s by evolutionary design that humans feel this way and end up googling, “I miss my ex girlfriend every day.”

I’m glad we found each other.

Ya see the reason you’re going through a drug-like craving is because that’s exactly what’s happening in your brain. The negative emotions both result from a lack of dopamine release. It feels like the broken-hearted actually had their hearts shattered because when we think about our exes, regions of the brain responsible for reward and motivation light up.

While areas of the brain such as the ventral tegmental area or the nucleus accumbens may light up, they’re not being fed in the same way they would be if you were sitting next to your ex with her hand in yours. It’s this inability to satisfy expectation in the brain that gives us a feeling of craving.

So what’s to be done?

Over my 8 years of coaching, I’ve had countless men consult with me because they can no longer stand the pain that comes as a consequence of missing their ex girlfriend. I’ve made it my livelihood helping men rebound.

In this article, we’ll outline 10 things you can do starting today in order to stop missing your ex so much and help you find that next special woman.

I Miss My Ex Girlfriend Every Day, What Should I Do?

Diagnose Your Attachment Style

We all deal with breakups differently.

What determines our ability to cope has a lot to do with our unique attachment style.

Freshly minted singles with anxious attachment styles have the most difficult time bouncing back.

Our childhood experience with those closest to us dictates our attachment style. Children with erratic guardians who dote on their kids one day and neglect them the next are likely to develop anxious attachment styles. As these children grow, they become clingy to those closest to them. They often lean on an individual or two for all their emotional needs. Should this emotion crutch be removed, someone with an anxious attachment style will fall flat on their face.

Counter feelings produced by this attachment style by learning more about it. Speak to a therapist or read up in order to arm you with the know-how to reverse unhealthy emotional behavior.

Create A Social Calendar

Had you kept a social calendar filled with social engagements with a variety of people you wouldn’t be suffering a broken heart in the first place.

Know that “the one” doesn’t exist. There is no single individual out there that will satisfy your every social and emotional urge. The person you talk to about workplace issues might not be the same person that turns you on late at night. Your partner can’t be your everything -and it’d be dangerous even if they could be.

You repeat the words, “I miss my ex girlfriend” because you put too much of an emotional burden on her shoulders. If you had balanced that burden on the backs of various friends and family members you wouldn’t be feeling like you do.

What you need now is to replace and address your emotional craving. Remember that it’s a lack of dopamine that’s making you feel askew. Replace the emotional hole in your heart by reaching out to your buddies. Reach out via text and plan out fun activities with your buddies. Always have an event on the calendar so that you know you have something awesome to look forward to.

Join 2 Or 3 Weekly Workout Classes

Funny how a breakup can help you achieve the New Years’ resolutions you gave up on two weeks into the new year.

There are in-numerous benefits to joining a gym post-breakup, but I’ll just list a few.

Sure working out can help you reduce the chances of heart disease and improve physical appearance, but right now these issues don’t need addressing. It’s your mental well being that needs to be taken into account and that’s exactly what hitting the treadmill a few times a week can improve.

Of course, hitting the gym is one thing, but going through an intense workout with others is even more impactful. There’s nothing like a taxing experience to help accelerate a social bond. Signing up for a dance, sping, yoga, or ab class will get you out of the house and into a gratifying social environment. Fresh off a breakup it’s social interaction that you’re in need of most.

Meeting new people and having positive interactions with others will convince you that you can create a meaningful relationship with another woman.

Jump Into A Sports League (A Co-ed League Is Best :))

If you thought enrolling in a gym class was an easy way to meet people, it’s got nothing on a co-ed sports league. Think about it.

It’s you against them. With the simple flick of a signature and $50 you can surround yourself with a team of male and female basketball players that you’ll work with to accomplish a shared objective. You’ll win, lose, and improve together. Was there ever an easier way to make connections?

A co-ed league is also a great way to meet women, but don’t get discouraged or try switching teams if there are no eligible females on your team. Focus on building bonds with your teammates and opponents. Being that co-ed leagues are fairly casual, don’t be surprised when you go out with drinks with players from teams from around the league.

Ask A Good Friend To Take A Vacation With You

Honestly, what’s better than packing your backs and jetting off to the beach with your best bud?

How can you miss anything about life pre-vacation when you’re sipping on a margarita and swimming in the warm waters of the Caribbean or Amalfi coast?

There’s no better way to clear your head. Vacationing with a buddy will not only give you the respite you so desperately need, but it’ll leave you refreshed for when you return home. Perhaps the other actions listed that’ll help you get over your ex aren’t easy to take -but this one is.

So pick up the phone, call a buddy and begin brainstorming dream vacations.

Get A New Job

Now that you’re single, you’ve got time to focus on yourself. What needs and desires have you been putting on the back-burners during your previous relationship? Now’s the time to finally learn Italian, start reading more fantasy novels, and even consider a career change.

You now have the space to take an introspective look at what you want. Doing away with the routine that was attached to your prior relationship will give you a fresh perspective and marks the beginning of a new chapter in your life. What you need to decide is how you want to write this new chapter.

Being that our lives are heavily dictated by our jobs, it’s worth ruminating on the state of your professional happiness. A relationship is tying you to a physical location, so why not try something new?

Write Down A Pros And Cons List

A breakup signals two things. One is the end of a relationship, the other is a new start. The beginning of another journey towards finding a mate that’s even better suited for you than the last. But this person won’t magically find themselves making eye contact at you at a bar and immediately fall in love with you. To find this person you may have to work a bit.

Part of that work involves understanding the likes and dislikes of your past relationship. How are you supposed to find a girlfriend better than your prior one if you don’t know what to look for.

Bust out a pad and pen, make like Jim Halpert, and create a pros and cons list.

It’s through the creation of this list that you’ll learn what you want in your next romantic relationship. Making a pros and cons list will prevent you from falling in love with the wrong person or committing the same mistakes you made in your previous relationship.

I Miss My Ex Girlfriend: Then Start Reverse Engineering Your Life

What’s life realistically look like for you in 12 months?

Are you alone, living in the same city, working the same miserable job?

Now imagine what you want life to be like in 12 months.

Are you in a relationship, feeling great in both body and mind having improved your love, work, and social life?

Asking these questions will help you create a timeline.

The only thing to do now is to create a blueprint that helps you get to where you want to go. It just so happens that when it comes to your dating goals, I’ve got a blueprint for you.

When You’re Ready, Start MegaDating

That blueprint is MegaDating.

In short, MegaDating involves dating various women at the same time. It means dating at least one woman a week, stacking dates, dating on Wedneday, dating on Fridays, dates in the park, hiking dates, biking dates, etc. The reason for dating women simultaneously is to decrease the amount of time needed to find a significant partner.

It’s too easy to date one or two people and settle for the first person you have a connection with. MegaDating addresses this fear by doting your calendar with dates. There’s no need to fear to let a woman go when you know you have five other dates scheduled for this month.

A MegaDating blueprint goes something like this.

On a first date you are to spend no more than an hour and $10 on a date. That’s right. Think of a first date as an interview albeit a much more enjoyable one. Most likely you don’t know the person you’re dating very well. So why would you want to spend 3 hours and $100 on a complete stranger? 10 minutes into the date you may realize that there’s no attraction. Despite this, you can’t uninvite her to the baseball game you two are now going to sit through for at least 2 hours. One hour. $10. That’s a MD first date.

A second date has two main differences when compared to a first. One is that the date must be active. The second is that it must be free. Active dates get the blood pumping, they’re novel, and as such make them more memorable and easier to form a connection with someone. Compare this to the standard second date which may involve dinner and a movie. Doesn’t a bike ride around the park or a jaunt through the park sound way more enjoyable? Not to mention the fact that dynamic dates make it way easier and even natural to physically touch your date.

Third dates have no financial or time constrictions. If she makes it to the third date it means you might see a future dating her in the long-term. Show her that you care for her -and aren’t broke- by taking her out. Third dates should also be scheduled at night and ideally near your home. If you’ve performed well up until this point you shouldn’t be surprised that she wants to sleep with you.

Need A Little Help? Hire Yours Truly

Dating multiple women a week sound too good to be true? It’s not. Book a new client 1-on-1 Zoom session now and we’ll discuss your current dating situation, create an action plan, and see if my coaching program is a fit for you. Together we’ll refine the MegaDating blueprint so that it suits your needs.

Tired of repeating the mantra of, “I miss my ex girlfriend?” Let’s fix that together.