How to Respond To A Woman Who Flakes on a Date
Fact; we all get rejected, flaked, and/or canceled on.
If you’re too afraid to get rejected, then sorry to say, but dating isn’t for you.
There are stories a plenty of even the most idolized celebrities being romantically rejected.
What matters isn’t your ability to avoid rejection, rather it’s how to respond to a woman who flakes on a date.
How you react when a woman flakes, cancels, or reschedules a date will ready you for the long and winding road that is dating.
In this article, you’ll learn why you shouldn’t get upset while simultaneously tactfully expressing disappointment. We’ll also discuss why you shouldn’t act like it doesn’t bother you by saying something like “oh, it’s all good, no worries.” Lastly, you’ll get a list of copy/paste lines you can use when a woman tries to flake or cancel a date with you.
What To Do When a Woman Flakes on a Date with You
Don’t Get Pissed
The type of dudes that get pissed at women when they’re disappointed are the type of dudes women don’t want to date. The romantic scene is full of disappointment. To endure the vicissitudes you’ll need to learn to respond without anger when things don’t go your way.
Keep in mind that getting flaked on or having a date canceled doesn’t necessarily mean that end of your fledgling relationship. That being said, responding with rage when a cool head is needed is a sure-fire way to ensure that you won’t be seeing her ever again. Swearing or threatening her also vindicates her decision to turn you down. In her mind, she’ll say, “phew, thank god I didn’t go out with him.”
Stay classy and never project anger, it will never get you the result you’re looking for. Anger will always help you catch more bees than honey.
Express Your Disappointment
Let’s set the scene.
It’s Friday night, you just showered and lathered yourself in your most pungent cologne and are about to quest out to meet your date when you receive a text… “Tonight’s a no-go, sorry.”
Rightfully so you’re bummed.
You had just set up this awesome date with a beautiful woman that you’ve been texting with for some time only to have your plans burned with a text.
There are various ways you can respond to such an ambush.
You can brush it off with the classic, “no worries, maybe another time,” or you can tell her how you really feel.
Don’t act like it doesn’t bother you because that just teaches her that you’re a doormat and therefore, not valuable or worth making an effort for. Instead, train her to never flake on you again by expressing your disappointment and communicating authentically.
So how exactly should you respond to a woman who flakes on a date?
Let’s get into it.
Lines to Use on a Woman Who Is Trying to Flake on a Date With You
A last-minute cancellation warrants a re-evaluation of the relationship.
If one flake meant the severing of ties there’d be little use in even responding to her rejection.
Being that this isn’t the case, let’s look at a few ways to respond that could sustain the relationship.
Never has a more powerful word been written or spoken.
Ouch is non-confrontational. It expresses your own truth. It’s simple and vulnerable and makes it clear to the receiver that your feelings are hurt. This engages a woman’s innate feminine nurturing vibes and shifts her energy so she stops thinking about herself. It can also shift the dynamic so she doesn’t have all the power.
It increases her desire to want to please and nurture you, which is immensely feminine. Pulling her strongly into her feminine, sets you into your masculine and creates polarity, which elevates sexual tension.
Ouch is the most laconic of responses that’s deemed permissible. If she doesn’t respond to ouch you can continue to elaborate on how you feel by following up with one of these messages.
“That’s disappointing, especially since I turned down plans with friends because this was already on my calendar and I didn’t want to flake on you.”
No woman wants to be with a man that relies on them for all their emotional and social needs.
This statement is effective because it demonstrates to her that you too had alternative options. You have your own unique life that needs to be respected. Sure she rejected you, but this line humanizes you, while forcing her to confront this disappointment.
It teaches her that her actions have consequences and that she shouldn’t be so selfish because it hurts others.
In a weird way, such a text might also elicit an “aw” response from her. Every woman loves to be doted on and cared for. She’ll be flattered knowing that you chose her over your buddies.
Making her aware of your value, needs, and recognizing who is to blame might be enough to persuade her into going out with you. That being said, you don’t want to guilt-trip a woman to go out with you. Pity dates aren’t worth anyone’s time if she has her mind made up about you even before the date.
If she’s sincere in her apology and doesn’t appear to be insincere in her desire to go out with you, give her another shot. Hey, if it goes south, no worries, it was just a one-hour first date.
“My time is really important to me so I’m not sure I’d feel too good about rescheduling honestly.”
This teaches her not to be selfish and that you’re valuable.
It’s a bit stern, so don’t expect her to try and make it up to you.
I’d recommend using this direct approach if you don’t really care about seeing her. Slim chance she’ll apologize and either keep the plan or try harder to make something else work and not flake.
Don’t feel bad about cutting ties.
If she skipped out on a first date, it’s likely that she was never serious about going out with you in the first place. Wait until she responds to reevaluate.
When you’re MegaDating, you realize that there are a ton of single fishies in the sea. When you MegaDate properly you’ll learn how to mine for dates and date in such a way that you’re able to date many women in a short period of time.
Sound sleazy? – it’s not.
It’s all about expediting the dating process so that you can quickly find a woman of merit that you can call your girlfriend.
“Not to be rude but when people cancel on me last minute, it makes me feel like they don’t respect me or my time and that’s not really someone I want in my life.”
She knows what she did.
Chances are an emergency didn’t take place. Chances are she either felt tired, found something better to do, or never was serious about dating you in the first place.
If last-minute flaking is a deal-breaker, this line is for you.
It’s better than ghosting because it’s mature to communicate authentically and teach her a lesson so hopefully she realizes the error and never commits it again.
I’d send her this strongly worded message if you feel that her reasoning or the amount of time before the date was an issue.
It’s not recommended to use this if you feel it was a real emergency and that’s why she’s requesting to reschedule. If she’s being vague, wishy-washy, or canceling last-minute, I’d use this approach. Chances are you won’t be seeing her again but at least you tied up loose ends and handled the situation with dignity and respect.
“I’m looking for a woman who respects me and my time as much as she respects hers.”
Here’s the thing about this one.
If the message really resonates with her, she’ll give you another shot. If it doesn’t, you may never see her again. But as your message conveys, that might not matter to you because you’re not looking to date women that don’t respect your time.
How to respond to a woman that flakes is all about how she decided to cancel the date and your desire to continue to date her. The degree in which you voice your disappointment depends on these two factors. What’s always important is that regardless of the aforementioned factors you keep your dignity, voice your disappointment, and show her that you are a man of worth.
“Thank you for letting me know. Honestly, I’m just not that interested in dating someone who flakes on me last minute but I do appreciate your communication and I wish you the best of luck.”
Rips the bandaid off.
Direct and to the point.
Don’t expect to see her but be confident that you stood up for yourself.
Again, don’t feel bad about cutting off ties. Forget about the woman that clearly doesn’t respect you and move on as quickly as possible. That being said, moving on is easier when you have dates already lined up.
MegaDating is the act of prolifically dating. I teach men to date various women simultaneously for multiple reasons.
For one, dating around helps you learn what you want in a romantic partner. It also teaches you how to date. Wouldn’t it be horrible if you finally scored a date with the woman you think could be the one, but you blow it because of your lack of dating history? MegaDating gives you the skills to date confidently, so that when you finally meet a woman of quality, you won’t blow it.
“I’m looking for someone who keeps their commitments.”
It’s short and to the point.
If she doesn’t respond to this kind of open-ended response, you know it wasn’t meant to be.
“I don’t feel like getting rejected twice, so if you’d like to go on a date, it’s now on you to ask me. Time for me to sit back, relax, and be pursued.”
Now the ball is in her court.
Now you can completely forget about her. No more worrying about if she’ll ditch you again. If she truly wants to see you, she’ll point forth the effort to create an awesome TDL and ask you out. In the meantime keep on dating other women that are willing to give you the time of day.
What’s The Next Step?
Now that you’ve learned to generate value and disappointment in every response, what’s next? Now it’s time to learn how to get the most out of your dating life.
She ultimately decided to flake because she didn’t deem you worthy enough to date.
To ensure this doesn’t happen again you’ll need to convey your worth prior to the first date. To learn how to do this, schedule a 1-on-1 Zoom call with yours truly. Consult with me now to create a tailor-made dating blueprint. We’ll also talk about your other dating obstacles, your goals, and we’ll see if my group or private 3 month coaching program could be a fit for you.