There are only a few things more difficult than starting and maintaining a quality conversation with a complete stranger.
Sure climbing Mount Everest, finding something to watch on Netflix in less than 10 minutes, and saving the last of your kettle corn are all difficult, but these aren’t challenges you’re faced with on the daily.
As you can see, meeting someone online is by far the most common way to meet a significant other nowadays.
A 2017 Stanford study found that in 2017, 39% of all new romantic relationships started online.
But just because love has gone online, doesn’t mean that the challenge of striking up a conversation has gone away.
Both women and men still struggle most with opening lines and icebreakers.
That’s why on some apps like Bumble and Facebook Dating, breaking the ice has been made easy through the use of built-in icebreaker questions.
The one we’ll focus on today is, “what would you guess about me that isn’t on my profile?”
This is one of the most popular icebreakers on both Bumble and Facebook Dating and as such deserves our attention.
What Would You Guess About Me That Isn’t On My Profile?
The reason this icebreaker gets so much love is because everyone is a narcissist.
Alright, perhaps that’s not technically true, but what can’t be disputed is that we love talking about ourselves.
Everyone’s favorite word is their own name, their favorite topic, themselves, and their favorite pastime, reminiscing about all the awesome things they’ve done.
That’s why this icebreaker is so often used. When in doubt we’ll always direct the conversation back to ourselves. Which honestly is kinda great.
Look, the easiest way to maintain an online conversation is to have the chat revolve around the other person.
As the great conversationalist, Dale Carnegie once said…
“If you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. To be interesting, be interested.”
That means giving a damn about what the other person is saying.
Stand out from the other guys by asking questions, listening, and by genuinely caring about the words coming out of the person’s mouth.
With this in mind let’s dive into some of the best responses to the “what would you guess about me that isn’t on my profile” icebreaker.
1) Put Them In The Best Light Possible
“You speak five languages, can make a mean boeuf bourguignon, and one time went crowd surfing to Hanson.”
Everyone wants to be interesting, smart, and beloved.
But if they aren’t actually those things, they at least want people to believe they are.
Make her seem like you think she’s the coolest person on the app.
To understand how effective this is, imagine what the opposite response might elicit. Imagine for a moment you responded to the icebreaker with, “You watch makeup tutorials for fun and take at least 20 bathroom selfies every day.” Clearly, one message is better than the other. The latter is condescending and will most likely not receive a response (or at least a positive one).
2) Truth, Truth, Lie
“Hmm, you either are a serious hiker, one time streaked in college, or know how to make pasta better than my Italian Grandmother”
If you only guess super amazing things about her she might be deflated when none of them are true. Maybe she doesn’t speak multiple languages, cook, or even go to concerts.
The three possibilities above are all possible and should be at least a little informed by her profile.
Sure you’re supposed to be guessing something about her that isn’t on her profile, but you can use what is on her profile to make inferences. Use these hints to make educated guesses that at the very least have a grain of truth. Use the TTL method to make the lie badass and as wild as possible.
She’ll think, “oh wow, my profile hints at that? He thinks I’m badass.”
Thinking that someone else thinks you badass will make her want to hang with you. This is called reciprocal liking and it’s backed by the sexiest wingwoman of all, science.
3) Guess Her Superpower
“You have the ability to teleport from city to city, but it only works for European cities”
Everyone wants to have a superpower, though sadly we’ll have to settle for the abilities our technological appendages grant us.
That being the case, give her the power you know she wants.
This is an easy superpower to endow as many a Bumble or Facebook Dating user will post various pictures of their travels. Other ridiculous superpowers might include invisibility (but only in the dark), the ability to train dogs to pick up their own poop, the ability to pick a new Netflix show in under 5 minutes, and the ability to sweat Tequila.
Grant her one of these somewhat useless yet ridiculous superpowers and she’ll be sure to thank you.
4) The Song That She Always Sings At Karaoke
“Your go-to karaoke song is Thinking Bout You by Frank Ocean, but when you’re feelin yourself obviously you sing Chiquitita”
Music has this uncanny way of opening people up.
Bonding of music is generally speaking, easy, even if the two of you don’t necessarily listen to the same music. Commonalities are always easy to find.
When guessing her go-to karaoke songs, you’re doing three things.
One: Putting her in a positive light. Instead of guessing her favorite TV shows (boring) you’re putting her in an awesome context and imagining her as the vivacious, outgoing, fearless karaoke singer that every woman wants to be perceived as.
Two: It’s an easy segue into then asking her out. If she’s into karaoke or is willing to entertain the idea, ask her out to karaoke on Tuesday.
Three: Guess one song that seems to suit her personality and one that you’d guess isn’t even remotely close to something she’d listen to. Doing so will flummox her and convince her to write you back demanding an explanation.
5) The Great Inventor
“You may or may not be the inventor of Chia Pet”
Guess an invention that is way out there, makes her nostalgic, or one that her profile suggests she could’ve invented.
This response is all about piquing her curiosity and making it impossible for her not to respond.
She’ll think, “why in the world would he say that?” She’ll be too damn curious to not respond.
This is your short-term goal. Just because she sent you an ice-breaker doesn’t mean she’s up for having a lengthy conversation. If your reply isn’t suitable she’ll just message one of her other dozen matches.
6) Give Her A Dog
“I’d guess that you have a bulldog named Chance that was accidentally left at home one time and travelled thousands of miles to see you”
First of all, everyone wants a dog. Check out my dog, Gemini the Bulldog.
It’s every child’s most requested gift.
If she does have a dog she’ll no doubt respond and tell you all about her best friend.
Even if she doesn’t have a dog she’ll tell you about how she wants one with all her heart. Once you’ve got the emotions bubbling lay on the charm by telling her that you’ve got one of your own and that you two should take a walk this Tuesday and get acquainted.
It’s almost too easy.
7) Get Right To It
“That you’re the type of woman that loves to go bowling on a first date… shall we?”
I’m gonna let you in on a little secret.
Bumble and Facebook Dating aren’t dating apps.
Gasp!
They’re introductory apps. As in they introduce you to people. You don’t actually go on dates on dating apps, you do so in the real world.
You want to get off the dating app as soon as possible.
To help you in this endeavor, when she asks you this question propose one of your own. Ask her on a kick-ass date.
Don’t expect her to say yes though.
Chances are she’ll respond positively to your date idea. Rarely is she asked on such a kick-ass first date.
However instead of saying yes she’ll tell you that’s a great idea or ask why you think she’d be up for such a unique date?
You’ll of course tell her that she seems like a woman that likes to try new things and prefers an adventurous date rather than a coffee date.
After you’ve built up rapport circle around and pitch this date using a TDL or one that is more suitable to her interests now that you know her a bit better.
8) Flatter Her Like A Pancake
“That you own your own company and ran your first marathon when you were 20 after a night of pure debauchery.”
Everyone wants to be more than they are.
As long as her profile in some way hints at your guess, feel free to make it as outrageous and flattering as possible. Although you’ll want to throw in some humor so she doesn’t think you’re some simp foaming at the mouth.
Whatever you do, don’t comment on her physique. Don’t talk about her smile, eyes, butt, etc. If it’s on her body, don’t talk or comment about it. This will only ever come off as super lusty.
9) The Oddly Specific Absurd
“That one time when you were 13 you were visited by a ghost in your Grandma’s house. It wore a high-hat, a kilt, and banana shoes. Am I right?”
That my friends is one of the best “what would you guess about me that isn’t on my profile” icebreakers.
Look chatting on dating apps is weird, so why not have a bit of fun with it?
Most guys give dull, grey answers that aren’t worthy of a response much less being read.
Give her something that’ll make her smile, giggle, and ultimately message you back.
10) Follow The Thread
“That you’re vaccinated, would love to go to Malta, and are looking for someone with a symmetrical face to go to the HAIM show this Friday with.”
Before responding always read her entire profile.
Read it, digest it, and let it inform your response.
Women love being heard. Take the minute or two it takes to read her entire profile. This will only help create a better response. The one above is a bit more generic and can be used if she hasn’t written much in her profile.
It also works because it suggests a date idea from the get-go.
Turn The Tables
“What would you guess about me that isn’t on my profile” is a pretty solid icebreaker.
So solid that you should use it yourself.
Whether on Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, Facebook Dating, etc. always use stimulating icebreakers that get her talking.
Icebreakers are incredibly handy when she hasn’t written much on her profile.
Seeing as how most guys only write, “hey” as an opening message, using a stimulating icebreaker will no doubt set you apart.
To test how impactful icebreakers are we ran a test.
During our testing, our icebreakers had a response rate of 42%.
This is mind-blowing when you consider the average guy needs to send 18 messages to women his age just to have a 50% chance of receiving a response.
Start Breaking That Ice
Now that you know how to respond to icebreakers like “what would you guess about me that isn’t on my profile” and leverage them for your own romantic gain, it’s time to take a sledgehammer to that ice.
However, I can understand if you still feel like a fish out of water or a bee out of the hive when it comes to online dating.
That’s where my team and I come in.
My squad of dating coaches and I have helped legions of men go from single to hitched.
To learn how we can help you simply schedule a 1-on-1 Zoom call.
During the call, you’ll have the chance to tell me all about your dating woes and I’ll lay out the path to romantic prowess.