She doesn’t love me anymore.

This is what you’ve been telling yourself.

She doesn’t hold you the way she used to, flirt like she used to, and seems more aloof than ever.

Naturally, you think it’s over.

It might just be, but you can’t be certain — not yet.

To help you understand what she might be thinking, allow me to take you on a journey.

You see, along with being a dating coach that’s helped hundreds of men find their forever partner, I’m also a woman, one that was in your girlfriend’s position.

I loved my boyfriend but wasn’t in love with him.

To better understand where your loved one’s head is at, first take a walk through my mind.

Understanding this new perspective will help you empathize with her as well as figure out the best path forward.

After I share my story we’ll take a look at ways to move forward without your girlfriend.

She Doesn’t Love Me Anymore… Or Does She

That’s what he thought.

My boyfriend and I had been together for seven years, then suddenly we weren’t.

It’s odd breaking up with a partner.

At first, you imagine it being simple, like throwing away an old pair of shoes. But a romantic relationship, especially one that’s been growing for seven years has deep roots, ones that touch every aspect of your social ecosystem.

Routines are done away with, the food you eat changes, where you live, the people you hang out with, even small things like when you shower in the morning or the type of toothpaste you buy all change.

Ending a long term relationship is super hard.

But staying in one that doesn’t have the legs is even harder in the long run, though for different reasons.

After seven years, we decided to cash out the emotional investment we put seven years into.

Tension

The tension was too much to bear.

We lived in a tiny 500-square-foot apartment, we both worked from home, and we were drifting apart professionally.

For a relationship to work you’re gonna need a solid foundation to build on.

Sometimes that foundation is more literal than metaphorical.

500 square feet is enough if you’re a fresh graduate ready to survive on ramen and tacos as you brave professional life. It’s not enough to cultivate a loving home space with your partner — at least it wasn’t for us.

What compounded the issue was the fact that we both worked at home.

Any psychologist will tell you it’s important to separate work and home life and that if possible don’t bring your work home with you.

That’s impossible when you work from home, and even more impossible during a pandemic.

The boundaries are blurred when you’re using the sofa as an office or the kitchen table as a conference room. It became too difficult to fully unplug and make romantic space for each other when not only were we around each other all the time but we couldn’t separate work from play.

This tension came to a head and we decided to end things. It wasn’t that we didn’t love each other, but rather that our space and where we were at professionally got in the way of allowing us to love each other in the healthiest way possible.

What Happened Next

We broke up and I thought that was it.

But my ex had other plans.

He gave me space while still keeping in touch.

He showed me that he wanted me and was ready to put the gloves on and fight for me.

FYI, that’s hot.

Not only this but he showed he was willing to fix what wasn’t working.

Together we identified what wasn’t working and made a concerted effort to make a change.

So we moved to a bigger apartment.

He adopted the same professional growth mindset that I had and started his own business.

And he worked on his communication skills. At the time of our breakup, he was going through a particularly rough patch and refused to express himself. Instead of talking he bottled it up and worked even harder.

That wasn’t healthy for him or me.

After getting back together we still struggled, but ultimately we both became much better at having honest conversations and communicating our feelings with one another.

To further test our reinvigorated bond, we also got a dog.

Most people probably wouldn’t advise getting a dog with someone you just get back together with, but we knew it was right for us. It brought us closer together, refined our parenting skills, and is preparing us for the thing that no one is ever really prepared for; having a furless child.

Where Are We Now

Engaged.

We both realized that we loved each other.

The reason we broke up in the first place was because my boyfriend wasn’t satisfying me emotionally.

We loved each other but were letting other things hinder that love.

Once we identified the blockages we were able to surgically remove the barriers.

What This Means For You

She doesn’t love me anymore. 

That’s what you’re thinking, but it might not be true.

I loved but fell out of love with my partner because of self-imposed barriers.

Can you identify these barriers?

If you can’t your partner surely can.

Before calling it quits, the least you can do is investigate.

Find out why what initially worked doesn’t work any longer. 

The only way to do this is with honest conversations you have with your partner.

Dedicate a time when you two can really dive into what isn’t working.

Having this conversation will save the both of you time in the long run. If she wants to end the relationship but is dragging her feet, this conversation will expedite the process.

It’s better the rip the bandage off than let the wound fester unbeknownst to you.

Rebuilding is always possible, but it starts with having a vulnerable conversation.

How To Move On

Breaking up and moving on isn’t like flipping a switch.

You can’t go 60 mph in one direction and then suddenly try to go 60 mph in reverse.

The heart doesn’t work that way.

In fact, scientists that have studied breakups will tell you it takes about 11 weeks or so before your heart is healed.

But 11 weeks is too damned long for my liking.

My magic number is two weeks.

Two weeks to eat whatever you want, feel horrible, tell all your friends what a horrible person your ex is, watch Mean Girls 10 times in a row, and play all the N64 you desire.

Whatever you want to help you heal and leave the baggage behind.

But after those two weeks it’s time to be a bit more proactive about your grieving.

The best way to get over someone is to forget about them. The best way to do that is to find someone new.

You can quickly find this new beau through MegaDating.

MegaDating

MegaDating is the process of dating multiple women at the same time.

MD has a ton of benefits including:

• Showing you there are plenty of women out there for you
• Refining your dating skills
• Releases sexual energy
• Shortcut to finding a compatible partner
• Boosts confidence

Dating various women at once is what all men wish they could do.

I’ll show you how to do it.

In my coaching program, I teach men how to tap their social networks to find single compatible women to date. In my course I’ll show you how to meet women online, at social clubs, through friends, at work, at the gym, at Meetup hobby groups, PTA meetings, and more.

The most efficient way to meet these women is online.

As you can see, meeting online is now one of the most popular ways new couples meet each other.

But to attract women in this hyper-competitive environment you’ll have to learn three things:

• How to create an amazing profile
• MegaMessaging
• TDL

Each aspect is crucial to attracting women and shifting the dynamic from an online one to one IRL.

By seeing that there are oodles of compatible women out there you’ll soon forget about your ex. It’s pretty difficult to think about her when you have multiple dates lined up for the week.

After a two-week grieving period, try going on a date.

If your heart isn’t in it, try another. If you feel as though you’re not receptive to emotionally connecting with women you may need to take another step back.

However, I guarantee that after you start MegaDating and see that there are dozens of women ready and willing to date you, you’ll find it hard to put your foot on the break.

But remember that MegaDating isn’t about being a libertine, it’s about quickly finding a compatible partner.

To learn more about MegaDating schedule a 1-on-1 call with me or a member of my team.

During this call we’ll talk about where you’re at in your romantic life, your dating history and your romantic goals.

We’ll talk about Dating Decoded and see if you’re the right fit.