The Ultimate Guide to Becoming a High Value Man

Want a high-value woman? Be a high-value man.

The math can’t get much simpler than that.

Be the type of man the woman you’re pursuing wants to date.

If you want a career-oriented, intelligent, beautiful woman, who is well put together, mature, and has a great personality, you need to be the type of guy who tickles her fancy.

But what exactly is a high value man and how do you become one?

Let’s go over the high-value qualities women look for in a man as you start your journey to becoming a high-value man.

How To Be A High-Value Man

In short, a high-value man is the type of guy 95% of women are attracted to.

They carry themselves well, have a good job, are emotionally stable, caring, funny, etc.

They’re all-around good guys that any mother would want for her daughter.

So how do you become the kind of guy nearly every woman wants?

Let’s start with the most obvious quality.

Double Take Worthy

This doesn’t mean you’re Chris Hemsworth. Sure that helps and yes he’s a high-value man, but we don’t need to shoot for the stars here.

You can come across as a high-value guy simply by dressing to impress.

That means:

Wearing nice/hip clothes
Tight/slim fitting
Nice shoes
Wear the right size
Choose a complimentary color scheme
Facial hair is on point

That doesn’t mean rocking a suit everywhere you go but maybe you’ll ditch the sweatpants for some nicer pants and the hoody for a sports jacket every once in a while.

If you don’t know where to begin when it comes to how to dress you can consult a stylist OR find a style icon. Stalk a few celebs or models whose style you want to emulate and look for pieces similar to what they wear.

Have Boundaries

Maybe she wants to go on a super fancy first date.

That’s a no-no.

At emlovz we advise men to go on one-hour dates costing no more than $20. This is because first dates are really extended introductions. If you’ve never met her before you’re going on a date with a stranger, one you may dislike after spending 5 minutes with. Don’t blow $150 on a fancy first date (like GQ advises) with a woman you may never see again.

If she demands you pick her up, pay for her taxi, or that you pay for literally everything you have a right to say no and establish boundaries.

Enforcing boundaries will make her respect you.

Having your own opinion and voice is sexy. High-value men aren’t people pleasers or desperate for dates.

Nice Head Of Hair

Sorry fellas, that means no Supercuts.

What you’re wearing and what your head is wearing are the first things she’ll notice about you.

If your cut is wack, your hair is feral, and beard hasn’t been trimmed in months, she’ll notice and be turned off. Unless you’re dating an equally disheveled woman your date won’t be feeling it.

Surely by now you’ve heard of the halo effect, right? The halo effect is when one part of your appearance or personality impacts how people view other aspects of your character. That means if she sees you looking great she’ll think you’re smarter, wealthier, funnier, etc. than if you weren’t looking your best.

Care About Your Body

Do you eat healthily and work out?

Maybe you should start.

Of course these two habits will help you attract a high-quality mate, but it goes beyond that. Eating healthy and working out will give you more energy, increase your mood, and allow you to live longer. Even if you never date a woman ever again, you’ll still feel better than had you not started working out.

And if you’re thinking o crap, now I need to start lifting every day and only eating spinach and chicken breast, you’re wrong!

If you have 15 minutes a week to hit the gym you have enough time to take care of your body and build muscle.

A recent study followed 15,000 men and women ages 18-60 around for a year as they worked out once a week using only six pieces of equipment. Using these six machines once a week for a year increased upper and lower body strength by 60% on average.

The exercises include:

Chest press
Pulldown
Leg press
Abdominal flexion
Back extension
Hip abduction/adduction

These are exercises you can do at any gym, yes even the one near you.

As for eating healthier that will be more difficult.

My suggestion, start small. Find my healthy meal that you love. Cook it, master it, and be sure to eat it at least once a week. The easiest way to make a lasting change is to substitute what you were eating for something that tastes even better.

Here are some quick, easy, healthy, and delicious meals you can cook in less than 20 minutes.

Humor

It doesn’t matter how much money you have, how strong you are, or how many cars you own. If you can make her laugh you’ve already won.

Superficial features help for initial attraction but they won’t sustain attraction.

If you don’t think you’re funny no worries, there are ways to get better at making her laugh.

Passion

No one wants to date someone who lacks motivation. Someone who doesn’t know what they want to do in life and has nothing that gets them excited.

Maybe you’re not super into your job — that’s okay.

But is there something that really motivates you?

Maybe that’s working out, training for a marathon, painting, teaching youth basketball, working on cars, etc. Women love passionate, high-value men.

Stable Mental Health

Women love men, not boys with deep insecurities.

If you’re a bit insecure it’s okay so long as you’re working on it. She’ll understand that no one is perfect, but at the very least she wants you to attempt to address those insecurities.

If you’re worried that she’ll hear about your therapy sessions, realize that being open about your mental health is kind of en-vogue nowadays.

You Don’t Try To Win Her With Money

This is lazy and disrespectful — not to mention it attracts the wrong kind of woman.

High-value men earn affection they don’t just attempt to buy it.

And look, she’s no doubt dated men with money before. If she’s a high-quality woman she won’t be blown away by a nice meal or a fancy car. She’ll be blown away by a guy that treats her right, makes her laugh, and who genuinely listens when she speaks.

Don’t Let Her Pay The Bill On The First Or Second Date

You may think this is at odds with what we just spoke about but it’s not.

Look, if you invite her on the date you have to pay. It’s as simple as that. She’s deciding to spend her valuable free time with you, a stranger. Paying for the bill is your way of saying thank you.

Of course, first and second dates should be relatively cheap, so don’t expect to break the bank when you pay.

After you’ve gone on 4 or so dates you can start to accept when she offers to split the bill. That being said it’s still the gentlemanly thing to do to offer to pay, especially when you’re the one who invited her out on a fancy date.

Walk Her To The Car Or Subway After A Date

I can’t tell you how many women have told me, the date went well but he didn’t walk me to my car so I never saw him again.

Look, it’s dangerous here out on these streets. Walking her to her car pretty much ensures that she’ll make it home safely. If it’s late at night you’re kind of seen as an ass if you don’t walk with her. Doing so will give you a ton of bonus points.

It’s also the perfect time to get your flirt on.

Don’t miss the chance to be a gent AND to get your mack on.

This Text After The Date

When you think she’s had enough time to make it back home text her this and only this:

Did you make it home safe?

This shows you genuinely care about her well-being. It’s also a clear sign that you want to see again without explicitly saying, I want to see you again.

Protecting her and making her feel safe is a super attractive feature in a man. Showing her you care will go a long way.

You’re A Risk Taker

Did you come from another country all alone to try to make it? Did you drop everything to start a company? Have you moved to a new place to start over again?

Whatever the (calculated) risk, she’ll take note and dig it. Women love a man that has the nerve to take risks in an attempt to better his life.

You Care About Others

It’s easy to care about oneself.

This is what most men do and it’s why most men aren’t of high value.

You show you care about others by how you treat servers, talk to strangers, chat with friends, if you gossip, and of course by showing how much you care for your family.

Seeing that you easily get along with most people and respect service workers goes a long way.

On a date, show her you care by simply asking questions and caring about the answers. A high-value quality she’ll love is your genuine curiosity and desire to get to know her.

Surprisingly High-Value Man Quality

Were you raised by a single mother?

Did you grow up surrounded by sisters or strong women?

She will absolutely love to learn this about you and see how it has impacted you. Boys that grew up around strong, loving women show a tremendous amount of respect for women. You probably don’t need to show her you grew up around women as I’m sure she’ll be able to see it in the way you treat her.

Sexuality

Sex is often a touchy subject.

What’s super sexy is when a guy can articulate his sexuality while making his partner feel comfortable. He can broach sensitive subjects that lead to a better sex life for both partners.

He listens to her and isn’t afraid to talk about what he wants in the bedroom.

It’s no surprise that sex is a major factor in building a happy relationship.

Being able to get the most from your sex life while satisfying her desires makes you a super desirable man.

You Invest In You

You’re never stagnant. Sure you occasionally enjoy the Netflix binge and prefer to stay in on chilly days, but you’re never complacent.

You want to improve who you are and get the most from your abilities. You stretch your comfort zone and are always looking for ways to improve.

Morals

Strong morals and values are super sexy.

Women are turned off by wishy-washy men. What will make you an even more high-value man is if your morals align with hers.

You’re Positive

Imagine going on a date, sitting down, and the first three things out of her mouth are negative.

The traffic was horrible, I had the worst day, they don’t have my favorite drink dammit.

Chronic negativity is gross. We all want to be around positive people. So be that positive person. At the very least keep the negativity to yourself on the first few dates – it’ll go a long way.

Encouraging

Support your woman.

Be her biggest cheerleader.

Tell her she can do it, let her vent to you, and help her achieve her goals. Be a team player that she can depend on and count on.

Confidence

If you smile, have positive body language, and are aware and confident in your abilities you’re sexy.

You speak up for yourself and back yourself she’ll feel like you’re worth seeing again.

To be confident you just need self-belief and to be comfortable with who you are. Self-acceptance is the best way to show her you’re confident.

You’re Happy!

High-value men are only high-value if they’re happy.

You can have all the nicest material things in this world but if you’re not happy you’re low value. Figure out how to be happy. Smile, be thankful, and women will love you for it.

Humble

An often overlooked quality of a high-value man is being humble.

It’s realizing you’re not king shit but even if you are you shouldn’t expect the world to bend the knee.

Far too many guys think the world revolves around them just because they have money or drive a Tesla. If you’re confident in yourself you don’t need to go around listing all your accomplishments.