Dating apps have taken over from mainstream online dating sites and can be one of the most effective ways to meet your ideal partner – if you know how to use them effectively. The biggest challenge with these apps is that they make the photo the barrier of entry. If a woman swipes left because she doesn’t like your photo, you lose the chance of ever connecting with her. This means your photos are more important than ever!
With an app such as Hinge, you have more options when trying to win people over. Photos still play a big part, but there are other features such as videos and comments that can give you the edge. So that you can increase your chances of finding the perfect match, I’ve put together this useful guide, the top 11 tips for dating app Hinge.
Choose photos wisely
The photos are the bread and butter of your profile. This is what most people look at first – we’re told by our parents not to judge people based purely on appearance, but really we’re all a bit superficial when it comes to online dating. Dating experts have researched long and hard into what makes the perfect dating profile photo. Here are some tips that we suggest when picking out the perfect pics…
→ Smile! No-one wants to date someone who’s frowning or looking grumpy. Alternatively, try gazing away with a more neutral expression. Surprisingly, studies have found that women can sometimes prefer a lack of eye contact and a more placid expression. Perhaps it gives off a more mysterious air?
⇒Show off your interests and personality. Pictures of you doing something active can make you seem more fun. This could be a picture of you crossing the finish line of Tough Mudder or a picture of your diving into a pool on holiday. Also consider travel snaps in exotic locations. All of this will make you more interesting and fuel conversation.
Be careful of photos with other people in. A pic of you and a bunch of friends all having a good time can be great for making you seem fun and social. What you don’t want is to be outshined by more attractive people with bigger guns. Neither do you want to be surrounded by lots of people not smiling. And whatever you do, don’t upload a photo of you and your ex – a photo of you and two women is okay as these could be your friend, but you and one other girl may suggest you’re already taken or haven’t got over your last relationship. It could just be your friend or sister but women aren’t going to know that and may get the wrong impression.
Enhancing photos isn’t always worthwhile. Research has found that whilst it may make you seem more attractive, it can also make you seem less attractive. Go easy on the filters and don’t go crazy with Photoshop.
That said grainy, blurred or ancient black and white photos should always be avoided. Clarity is important.
Don’t be afraid to show pictures of you and your children. It tells people right off the bat that you’ve got kids. Your ideal partner needs to be okay with this.
You get bonus points for pictures of dogs. No, but really, animals are always a plus. Weed out the pet-haters early.
Yep, that’s a lot of pointers to take on board. Still not sure if your photo is good enough? I’d highly recommend our photolab tool if you want to get feedback from real single women on your dating photos before you launch your apps.
2) Link Instagram to your Hinge account
Got an Instagram account? Give your prospective date a better window into your life by linking it up with Hinge. Instagram offers a greater selection of photos that will help people to get better understanding of you and your lifestyle. This means more conversation starters and more potential areas for chemistry.
3) Add a video to set yourself apart
Photos don’t always give a full idea of what someone’s like as a person. A video gives you much more options to demonstrate your personality and show people what you’re all about.
You can use videos however you wish – but for maximum impact we recommend either a) showing off your talents, or b) making people laugh.
When it comes to showing off your talents this could be a video of you playing guitar or skiing or dancing. ‘I like skiing’ might not mean much to someone who shares the same interest, but a video shows others exactly how good you are and the type of places you ski in, all in all offering more to talk about. Alternatively, a woman who knows nothing about your interest might be wowed and more likely to talk to you, especially if your hobby is something obscure like Krav Maga or paddleboarding.
When it comes to making people laugh meanwhile, this can be anything that fits your style of humour. It could be a video of your dog or even a video of you falling over (think FailArmy.com). I’d probably lay off acting out a comedy sketch unless you really are a standup comedian, but really anything goes.
4) Set a 20 year window on age preference
Studies have found that relationships work best when partners are within a 20 year window (i.e. no less than 10 years younger and no more than 10 years older). Most people don’t cast their net wide enough. Men are also less likely to date women older than them. All this can be hugely limiting – there could be a woman older than you that looks young for her age and shares all the same interests and hobbies. Besides, you don’t have to date these women – it’s simply a way of keeping your options open.
5) Avoid negative language
Don’t be a negatron, be an optimus prime. We all want to naturally be around happy people. Try to avoid scaring potential matches away by grumbling or being aggressive with your opinions.
Negative language could include phrasing around interests, such as ‘I don’t like cats’ or ‘I don’t like pop music’. Unless you’re really really really passionate about these dislikes, avoid them as they could deter that otherwise perfect match, just because they took insult with you saying you didn’t like cats. Phrasing can sometimes make a difference too, for example it may be better to swap ‘I quit my day job as a banker to become a football coach’ for ‘Football is my passion and I help coach kids’.
Similarly you should be careful about being too self-deprecating. Women don’t like to be constantly confronted with cocky guys, but too much self-deprecation could come across as a lack of confidence. Rather than saying ‘I’m hopeless at cooking’, be creative and try things like ‘Beans on toast is my speciality’.
6) Use humour
We all like to find someone we can share a laugh with. Hinge offers users the chance to answer questions about themselves. Don’t settle for generic answers – be funny. Here are just a few examples:
- ‘I’m legitimately bad at’: folding fitted sheets
- ‘what I wanted to be when I grew up’: professional cocktail drinker
- ‘most traumatising childhood movie’: The Ring. She was getting out of the TV.
Try to keep some things serious such as your age. If you’d got a decent job and good income, you should also be careful about showing off your wealth – most women will be put off by this and the ones that aren’t may only be interested for one reason. On the opposite end of the spectrum, it’s probably not ideal saying ‘I’m poor’ either – even if you mean it jokily.
Photos and videos can also be a great opportunity to display your sense of humour.
7) Set up a date plan on your profile
Coming up with a date plan to suggest on your profile can get the ball rolling and can be great for attracting a match, for example: ‘I’m looking for someone to take to Salsa dancing lessons with me’.
This can take a date straight from the online setting to the real world, allowing you to both get to know one another in person rather than taking part in epic conversation chains from your phone. You may even be able to suggest something you’ve always wanted to do but have never wanted to alone or with friends, such as going ice skating or going to a musical.
8) Leave a comment with your like
On top of the chance to leave a like, Hinge allows users the chance to leave a comment. This can lead to two times more conversations, so shouldn’t be neglected. Make it a comment that inspires them to message you back (e.g. don’t be mean!).
9) Get creative with conversation starters
‘Hey’ and ‘hi there’ aren’t likely to encourage much conversation. You wouldn’t spark a chat with a random stranger like this in real life, so why use these conversation starters online? Start with a question regarding something you want to know or comment on one of their interests. You could even lead with a joke.
For a more in depth look at the perfect conversation starter, this article in Men’s Fitness can help. Research has shown even age and location can play a large factor when it comes to a successful conversation starter.
10) Don’t get mad at women who don’t respond
The data suggests that guys are more likely to get impatient. In fact, if a woman doesn’t respond within 6 hours, guys are 25 % less likely to respond. On top of this, some people can have a bad habit of interrogating women who refuse to reply, which can sometimes lead to angry outbursts – especially if you’ve previously been having a conversation and they’re now blanking you.
Getting angry will only deter potential matches further. Women are more likely to delay their responses, so it’s worth waiting it out. They may well have turned their notifications off (it can make leaving one’s phone around easier without co-workers seeing that someone’s winked at them). If after a few follow ups you’ve still got no reply, it could be worth calling it quits – not replying is likely to be her polite way of telling you that she’s not interested.
11) Enable Hinge matchmaker
Hinge Matchmaker is a service that allows your friends to hook you up with your friends. If you trust your friends to be your wingman, this could be a great way of meeting new people. Many women already partake in online dating with their friends there to give their opinions. It needn’t be a solo pursuit for men either – get your buddies to help you find that ideal partner.
The Benefits of using Hinge
Hinge has been a pioneer of many online dating options such as being able to leave videos. Its creative methods have allowed many users to find their perfect match, offering more options that a simple swipe. Clearly, dating can sometimes be demotivating. Hinge helps to combat this by giving weekly reports to let users know how they’re progressing including the number of likes they’ve had, the number of likes with comments they’ve had and the average distance away of people you’ve liked live.
The trick is to not give up. It’s not uncommon for online users to be trawling through apps like Hinge for months only to get several replies from encouraging matches at once (life typically makes you wait and then give you countless options at once, so that you have to choose).
Need more advice on how to score that winning date? Online dating isn’t easy and there is extra guidance out there for those that need it.