When it comes to the furniture, that’s easy, you never were a fan of pastel polka dots on your couch anyways.

As for the records, well you both know who the Celine Dion records belong to.

The house is now finally clearing out.

The dishes have been divvied up, you left her the mattress, and she left you the framed map of Amsterdam. You never thought things would go this smoothly after breaking up with your long-term girlfriend.

Then she pops the question. No, not the one about intertwining your lives together for infinity — you just broke up — no it’s the one about who gets to keep the dog.

You had promised her the boxing gloves, but this might be an appropriate time to throw them on and go at it.

Deciding who gets the dog after a breakup is never an easy matter to settle.

Assuming you both love the dog equally and adopted him or her together, it’s difficult to argue that either party has a clear claim for the ownership rights of the dog.

To determine who walks away from the relationship with a loving pooch in hand, let’s break it down.

Who Gets the Dog After a Breakup?

Joint Legal Custody

The whole issue of deciding who gets to keep Spot may at first seem farcical. But as Americans continue to opt for adopting a dog instead of having babies, this quandary will only become more frequent.

The most civil and straightforward solution would be joint physical custody. Every other week or two your little pooch would find itself at Mommy or Daddy’s house. Medical bills, the cost of food, and the amount of time spend with your pup would be evenly split right down the middle.

But as you’ve no doubt noticed, there’s one major issue with this. The new dynamic necessitates that you continue to see your ex. Is that something that you can emotionally handle? Your baby will tether you two together for as long as the joint custody lasts. I know it’s difficult, but can you really handle seeing your ex every week or two? Will you be able to move on if every time you’re about to get over the hump, there she is, knocking on your door with your dog in hand.

While this might sound like a solution for the moment, it won’t last forever. At some point, one of you will move away from the other and will demand that the agreement end, and for the dog to live with them on a permanent basis.

Also, consider how emotionally taxing this might be on your dog. Not all animals are emotionally equipped to be uprooted every other week.

How Did The Dog Come Into Your Life?

If the dog belonged to you or your ex prior to the genesis of the relationship, then the dispute should be settled easily.

An issue may arise if the dog was gifted to your partner.

More often than not, it’s the guy that gifts the woman the dog. In this case, you can argue that sure, you bought the dog, but you did so as a gift, for her. Ultimately she’s got the upper hand and will most likely walk away with the dog.

Although it doesn’t sound warm and fuzzy, the dog is considered property. If you believe that property has been wrongfully taken from you, you can use a lawsuit called a writ of replevin to get your dog back. This type of lawsuit can only be used if you two are boyfriend and girlfriend. The legal dynamic changes if you’re filing for divorce.

While a writ of replevin may sound harsh, it’s effective and is the quickest way to settle a dispute. To establish ownership a court usually needs nothing more than adoption papers, microchip registration, or veterinary records to demonstrate that you’re the true owner of the dog.

Let The Dog Pick

Remember the Air Bud scene at the end of the movie when the judge allows Buddy to choose who he wants to live with?

The dog is placed in between the two potential owners and whoever Buddy chooses will become his permanent owner.

For Hollywood, this way of deciding ownership just makes sense right? In real life, this method won’t go over as smoothly as it would in the movie.

While that may be the case, you can still ask yourselves who the dog likes most.

Be honest with yourselves.

You both know that the pooch probably has a favorite. He isn’t bound to the unwritten rule of adult parenting that says that parents must never explicitly say which child they prefer. You both know who the dog gets more excited for when you both walk in the room together, or who she’s always trying to snuggle up next to. Do what’s right and allow your dog to live with the person he or she has formed a closer bond with.

Who Can Take Better Care Of Your Dog?

IF you’re still questioning who gets the dog after a breakup, be honest with yourself – who can take better care of your dog?

Look, your living situations are on the verge of changing dramatically.

Perhaps the only reason you two decided that adopting a dog was possible was because she works her 9-5 at home. If you were to move away, you couldn’t possibly imagine leaving your dog home alone for 9 hours while you’re away at work.

It’ll be a tough decision but you need to do what’s right for the dog.

Consider what life will be like when you move out of your shared home. There are a lot of uncertainties ahead possibly including your own living situation. You may not be moving in with roommates who will be home to take your dog out and give her the attention she needs. Or your roommates might be home, but unwilling to allow animals in the apartment.

You both need to do what’s best for the dog.

The Decision

There’s a lot to consider when staking your claim for who your pooch should live with.

Who adopted the pooch, who the dog likes more, who is in a better position to care for the dog, how pet-friendly your new space is, and the cost of caring for your dog are all worth considering when trying to justly determine who keeps the dog.

Whatever decision you two come to, be prepared to respect it and walk away from both your ex and your dog if needed.

To mentally ready yourself for the next chapter of your life you need to be able to distance yourself emotionally from the situation. Again, although it may be difficult to stomach, the best way to move on might be to cut ties with both your ex and your dog.

Losing your girlfriend and man’s best friend in the span of a couple of weeks can be an emotionally gut-wrenching double whammy.

Luckily I have a strategy that will help you move on once your ex is out of your life.

Moving Forward

There’s no disputing how physical wounds heal.

If you’re cut, you wash the wound, maybe toss an antibiotic ointment on it, and bandage it up.

Pretty straightforward.

But what are you to do if a woman just threw a metaphorical trident laced with acid through your heart?

There is no universally accepted way to move forward.

My advice? Take two weeks to a month for yourself. Binge Netflix, eat Eggos waffles, but also take time to rekindle the friendships you may have lost while you were galavanting around with your girlfriend… and your dog.

You’re likely to feel pretty low after a breakup. You’ll feel the need to reconnect with your girlfriend if you don’t get your fix of social interaction from elsewhere. That’s why it’s important to fill your calendar with social engagements. The more often you play tennis with your college buds, or hit the ax-throwing bar, the less likely you are to hit up your ex.

MegaDating

Once you’ve watched all the baking shows on Netflix (bro do you even bake?) — it’s time to get back out there.

MegaDating is the best way to get back on the horse.

It involves dating multiple women simultaneously. Why simultaneously you ask?

Look we’d like to believe that love is something that just magically happens to us, but that’s not reality. A dazzling woman isn’t going to tap on your shoulder while you’re reading Malcolm Gladwell at the park and instantly fall in love with you. It sounds nice, but it ain’t gonna happen.

The quickest way to find a woman you can connect with is to date around. It sounds sleazy, but the objective of dating a myriad of women at the same time is to cut down on the time you spend without an awesome woman by your side.

MegaDating involves using dating apps, friends, Meetup, gym memberships, and other social engagements to mine for dates. Being that effective MegaDating involves going out multiple times a week, you’ll need to adhere to the MD blueprint to get the most out of your dates. That means that first dates should last no longer than an hour, nor should they require spending more than $10. In this way, you’ll have enough time and money to date various women at the same time.

Need some help to get going?

Losing your girlfriend and dog can be devastating. It can feel like someone socked you in the stomach. Time to feel sorry for yourself right? Wrong!

Get up, dust yourself off, and get back out there. If you need a push, that’s what emlovz is here for.

Book a new client session with me or one of my other coaches today and we’ll discuss your situation in more detail, create a customized dating strategy, and see if our coaching or matchmaking programs could help you get back on your feet.