How To Turn A Woman On Sexually With Tilly Storm
Women aren’t some unsolvable puzzle.
But I can understand how men can feel that way. For centuries men have been fed the wrong advice when it comes to courting and more specifically, turning a woman on sexually.
Doctors have chronically invested little into understanding women, sexual education is better learned via Netflix than in the public school system, and men today are still giving crap advice like helping other men find the holy grail of women pleasure, the G-spot (which by the way doesn’t even exist).
So it’s no surprise that when it comes to sex, there’s an orgasm gap that sees men orgasm nearly 100% of the time whereas women orgasm just 65% of the time.Â
To help bridge that gap, demystify the secrets of female pleasure, and help improve not only her sex life but yours as well we consulted with our sex coach Tilly Storm to answer some of the most often asked questions regarding how to turn a woman on.
How To Turn A Woman On
Tilly Storm is a holistic sex and intimacy coach and host of The Multiorgasmic Mama Podcast since 2017.
Coach Foundation recognizes her as one of the top sex coaches in the world and her podcast has an audience of over 250,000 listeners.
As a sex coach she knows a thing or two about teaching men how to turn a woman on.
We sat down as she answered questions men often have about how to turn a woman on as well sexuality in general.
What Is One Thing That A Man Can Say To A Woman To Turn Her On?
You think you know this one right?
You compliment her appearance or her personality and then drop the mic, right? Telling her she’s more beautiful than Scarlett Johansson and smarter than Marie Curie than walk away right?
Not exactly.
According to sex coach Tilly Storm, the one thing that turns her on is not what you were expecting to hear:
I’m here for you no matter what, or something along those lines.Â
Not at all what you were expecting right?
Tilly says that letting a woman know that you will accept the complex, robust, and multi-dimensional woman she is will turn her on emotionally and intimately.
Turn her on by telling her:
- I fully accept you
- I accept you however you want to express yourself, however you want to be
Of course, maybe you don’t whisper this into her ear while in the bedroom, but during intimate conversations bring this up. When you two are opening up to each other, tell her that you love her and that regardless of who she is, you will accept her.
Feeling comfortable with a man is what all women want. Once they are comfortable they will show you who they are and your relationship will thrive outside and inside the bedroom.
What Should You Do When A Woman Looks At You In A Social Setting?
Hold eye contact until she turns away.Â
Of course, only do this if you’re also interested in her. Sustained eye contact is a clear sign that she’s into you.
Tilly says that eye contact alone isn’t a good sign, but rather three touches of eye contact. If she seeks you out three times it’s a sign that you should approach.
So is eye contact a sign that she’s sexually interested?
Not necessarily, but she’s inviting you to come talk to her.Â
Take this opportunity to approach her with no fear.
Here are a few tips on how to approach a woman:
- Don’t wait too long before approaching or the flame will die
- Use a situational opener, not some random pickup line
- Be direct, e.g. Hi I’m Dave. I’d kick myself if I didn’t come over here and say hi, what’s your name?
- Be respectful
- Acknowledge her friends
- Reframe the situation. You’re going to talk to a woman you find interesting, rather than it’s a do or die situation, you either get her number or you fail
- Don’t linger. If she’s not feeling it, move on
What Are Some Things Women Crave In Bed But Never Say Out Loud?
Learning how to turn a woman on is all about learning what she likes in the bedroom. But it’s not always easy to know what a woman is into between the sheets. So we asked Tilly what women want to say and do in bed but are afraid talk about:
To be clear, this isn’t all women. This is simply what Tilly feels a lot of women feel. They want to be that naughty woman and talk dirty, tell men what they want, and to be sexually liberated, but too often they feel they can’t behave this way with their partner.
Sexually liberate the woman you’re seeing by asking her what she likes in the bedroom. Ask her while you two are not in the bedroom. If she asks for something in the heat of the moment and you reject it this may result in a massive turn-off.
Talking prior to sex is like going into the bedroom with a gameplan. A gameplan is much better than winging it.Â
To release her inner dirty, Tilly says to tell her that she can be as much of a slut as she wants because it’s totally fine to express that.Â
What Should A Man Do If His Partner Doesn’t Like To Give Oral?
Tilly says this happens a lot with women who grew up in a strict religious environment due to what their religion says or the stigma around fellatio.
If it goes against their faith, drop it and move on. Be content with the sex life you have sans oral sex.
If she feels shame or fear around it, realize this is totally normal.
It all starts with having an open conversation. The best way to start it might be as simple as saying, hey, how do you feel about trying something new tonight?
This question should be popped outside of the bedroom. Ambushing her with this question in the bedroom could be pressure on her and make her uncomfortable. Plant the seed of oral sex in her mind and bring it up a couple of times to see if her opinions around it have changed. Plant the seed, talk about it, but don’t expect her to be down right off the bat.
How Should A Man Sexually Escalate Into Dirty Talk?
Be upfront.
Tell her that you’re into talking dirty and ask her if she’s okay if you talk dirty to her. Ideally, this leads to a conversation surrounding dirty talk and boundaries so you can gauge what works and what doesn’t.
Maybe she isn’t 100% for it, but again, it’s about planting seeds. She may feel vulnerable and uncomfortable but by voicing your desires in a safe space in a respectable way you two can grow to learn more about each other and feel open about trying new things.
How Can A Man Attract A Woman Without Saying A Word?
Eye contact, eye contact, eye contact.Â
Women are attracted to men that know what they want. If you make repeated, sustained eye contact in a way that indicates you want her to notice you she will be turned on. But this is all foreplay until you make the move and approach her.
When doing so Tilly says to walk up to her as slowly and confidently as possible.
What Are The Flirtiest Questions To Ask A Woman To Get Her To Want You?
Remember that it’s not all about you. Asking her a question about what she’s into is one of the best way to turn her on.
One thing women really enjoy is to know that you care about what they want and like and not just what you want to do to them.
So one thing that could be really great to talk about to create tension and a turn on and the desire for her to want to have sex with you is to let her know that in some way. So you can ask her, what is it that you like sexually? What are some of the best sexual experiences you’ve had?
When to ask her about her best sexual experience and what made it amazing all depends on the vibe. Tilly suggests asking on the second date, and if not, definitely by the third date.
Women always complain that men are selfish in bed. Tilly says that giving her cues off the bat that you’re interested in pleasing them can go a long way.Â
If a woman thinks you’re a caring lover, she’ll be super turned on and excited to see what’s in store when you two turn down the lights.
What’s A Good Small Penis Sex Position That Can Pleasure A Woman And Their Partner?
Even Tilly says in her personal experience she had sex with a woman with a smaller-than-average penis but it didn’t matter because he knew how to use it.
That being said if you want a straight answer, missionary is one of the best. You’re giving her plural stimulation. You have eye contact, vaginal penetration, AND clit stimulation. Doggie style also works because it’s easy to penetrate her and go deep with doggie. 90-degree angles are your friends.
What Are Some Early Signs That A Woman Is Sexually Interested In You?
Before going in for the kiss men should be on the lookout for signs that she is sexually interested. No one wants to go in for the big kiss or ask her to come back to your place without knowing her feelings about you.
Tilly says some signs that she’s interested in you include:
- Blushing, indicating she’s nervous around you
- Goes out of her way to help you
- She’s close to you in proximity
- She says she misses you or was thinking about you
- Always fixes herself when she’s around you
What Do Women Secretly Want Men To Do?
Women want men to do lots of things to them sexually.
But oftentimes, they’re just too afraid to ask. If you really want to learn how to turn a woman on, ask her. The act of asking is a turn-on, and then doing as she commands is an even bigger turn on. What man doesn’t want to be the secrets to make a woman feel good in the bedroom?
As far as the most common things women secretly want men to do, Tilly says:
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