I know a lot of guys who think twice about dating a taller woman. But my first long-term boyfriend was 5’3″ and I always thought he was hot. Standing three inches shorter than me, I wasn’t bothered by his height at all. 

It’s easy to get caught up in what society may think. Problem is, you make your dating pool so much smaller when you do that. If you follow my blog, you know I strongly recommend MegaDating — a tried-and-true technique for increasing your dating volume and ultimate success with women.

To MegaDate, you need to have access to a large pool of women (I’d say, join no less than five dating sites to start with). But if you decide against dating a taller woman, you cut down your choices by a huge percentage once again… after all that work!

To stay competitive in the game of dating is hard — so don’t limit yourself! Instead of getting weird about dating a taller woman, learn to embrace it. Whether you’re a short guy or an average-sized guy who prefers to date women shorter than yourself, you’ll feel much better about your choices once you get over your hangups about height.

To help you do that, I’ve put together this list of eight tips for dating a taller woman. This includes practical advice as well as some deeper points to reflect on that’ll hopefully change your mind.

Tips for Dating a Taller Woman

Let’s start with the elephant in the room. You’re hesitant to date a taller woman because you think you won’t look “manly” enough to her.

True, you can’t control what another person thinks. But you definitely have control over the way you present yourself. Maybe she’s not into shorter guys but you can distract from this or even neutralize it by playing up your other assets visually.

Make your clothing a priority. Not exactly someone who’s into fashion? Try a subscription-based clothing service like Trunk Club or Stitch Fix that’ll send you coordinated pieces to try on at home. You’ll save time and get styled by an expert.

They’ll send you stuff that’s both affordable and on-trend, giving you a cooler look that’s more current. Not only that, but you’ll look a lot better than the other dudes out there who don’t bother to dress well.

Also, stay well-groomed. Consider your options when it comes to facial hair. Maybe you’re the type that could pull off a hipster type beard, or maybe a shadow or goatee would work better with your jawline. Look at some photos and see what you can create for yourself. Check out YouTube for tutorials if needed. Also, take care of any skin issues (acne, discoloration) with topical treatments.

Finally — this is long-term, but well worth it — think about getting into better shape. A short guy who’s fit is still miles ahead of a taller guy who’s out of shape. Investing in your fitness, combined with your grooming and clothing choices will make you much more competitive in the dating pool.

2. Don’t Exaggerate Your Height Too Much

A lot of guys do this, and I understand why: One study found that a whopping 48.9 percent of women restrict their online dating searches to men who were taller than them.

Even if you didn’t know the exact numbers, you probably figured that out from experience. So, if you’re a short guy, I can see why you’d exaggerate your height in your online dating profile. I just wouldn’t do it too much. 

If you lie about your height more than a couple of inches, she’ll definitely notice that as soon she meets you. Let’s say you list yourself as six feet tall when you’re really 5’9”. Everyone knows what six feet looks like. Most likely, she’s had a brother, dad, past boyfriend, or many people who were that height or very close to it. So, once she sees you, she’ll instantly compare you in her mind to someone else who’s six feet and know you’re lying.

At that point, you look dishonest. While most of us know guys exaggerate their height, just don’t make it ridiculous. We’re not blind!

On the other hand, what if you were honest about your height? It might kick you out of a lot of women’s online searches, but if you’re looking for a long-term relationship, the ones left without height filters might be more genuine.

3. Know Your Value

Height is something that you can’t change — so why not change your limiting beliefs around height instead? What benefits do you have in being shorter? Can you work your way through crowds faster? Qualify for child passes on admission? Still trick-or-treat in a costume?

Okay, I’m having a little fun with this, but you get my point. Look at the positives and own your height. After all, it will set you apart from other men, which is always a good thing. 

The 100 Reasons Why Exercise

On a serious note, if your feelings of self-worth are affected by your height, try doing the following exercise. It’s called “100 Reasons Why.” The rules are simple: Make a list of 100 reasons why you deserve your dream girl, regardless of your height. This helps to boost confidence and remind you of your value. No matter how much taller she is, you still have a lot to bring to the table.

4. Sell Yourself

Once you know what you have to offer, find ways to work those things into the conversation when you’re with her. This doesn’t mean you should brag. It just means being direct and forthcoming about your achievements and good qualities… in a super subtle, yet honest way.

Go back to your 100 Reasons Why exercise and maybe pick out recent successes that pertain to your work. Let’s say your business has been taking off or you just became an executive at your company. Find ways to mention those things indirectly.

You might talk about how hard it is to manage your time now that sales are through the roof and the business has you working around the clock. Or how surprised you were when your new staff threw you a birthday party in the office. 

Do this in a setting that’s outward-focused — maybe wait till the second date when you’re out hiking or at a ball game — and it will feel much more low-key and natural. 

5. Own Your Masculine Energy

When you’re dating a taller woman and possibly feeling strange about it, the best thing you can do is really own your masculine energy. What does this mean? 

Cultivate the qualities of an “alpha male.” The alpha male knows what he wants, is confident about who he is, and will not allow other people’s opinions to distract him from his goals. He’s also considerate, respectful, and assertive.

Step into your masculine energy when you interact with your taller dates and see if that doesn’t change the vibe between you. It should. Here are some quick tips for doing that:

When you ask her out, always use a TDL (time, date, location).

Do not give in to the temptation to ask her “When are you free?” or saying, “We should hang out sometime” when you want to take her out. Be upfront and clear by giving her specifics and making it obvious that you’re asking for a date. See my post on how to use a TDL for more on this.

Be chivalrous.

Not only does chivalry make a woman feel special, but it also makes her feel cared for and safe when she’s with you. This is actually a huge “alpha” trait. Assert your masculinity by doing things like paying for the bill, giving her your jacket if she gets cold, and walking her to her car or Uber.

Help her solve problems.

A guy who can fix things is like gold. Maybe she’s struggling with an issue at work, needs a repair done in her apartment, or can’t seem to find some information she’s looking for. Step in and try to help. She’ll love you for it. Do this enough times, and your height difference won’t mean much to her anymore. (Hopefully, you can get over it, too!)

6. Find Role Models and Emulate Them

There are a lot of celebrities who are short and are dating taller women. So, consider how you can shift your beliefs by using role models as examples. Tom Cruise is a classic case — he’s always dated taller babes. Employ some of what he uses to come across as hyper-masculine. Copy his body language and imagine yourself as an action star. 

Comedians like Kevin Hart have also learned to make fun of their height. You can do the same. Develop a good sense of humor about it like they do. You might even try a comedy, improv, or creative writing class to really sharpen your skills so your sense of humor overrides any feelings about the height difference she may have. At the same time, remember…

7. Don’t Be Negative About It

No matter what, don’t keep complaining about the fact that she’s taller. It may be tempting to compare yourself to other couples when you’re out or make sarcastic jokes about her height, but just don’t do it. 

First, when you use humor, make sure it’s self-deprecating (insulting your date is never good!) and actually funny (I wasn’t kidding about those improv classes). Otherwise, you’ll seem negative and possibly ruin a good thing.

This is especially important when she wears heels. Tell her she’s beautiful when she wears heels. Don’t say, “Can you wear flats? I don’t want you to be that much taller than me.” That’s just a sign of insecurity. If you truly know your value, it won’t bother you if the woman you’re dating is an Amazon woman towering above you. You’ll know you’re the man and that she looks sexy. 

8. Enjoy the Advantages

Dating a taller woman has tons of advantages. Don’t believe me? Let’s just look at a few of them. 

First of all, If she’s very tall, some guys might avoid dating her for that reason. That sucks for her… but it’s good for you since there will be less competition. So don’t be afraid to approach her. 

You guys could also probably share clothes if you’re an average height guy and she’s a tall woman (or, if you’re a short guy and she’s taller than you). Hey, you might laugh, but this comes in handy! How many times did you give up a sweatshirt to a girl and wished you hadn’t because you’re freezing your ass off? Well, now you can do the same thing and wear hers.

One more: If you drink, she can more likely keep up with you. Again, if she’s a tall woman, she can handle more — or if she’s average height woman and just taller than you, she could still match your pace pretty well. If you’re still partying, this is obviously a plus.

Dating a Taller Woman Wrap-Up

Even if dating a taller woman is a little uncomfortable at first, I’d say go for it. There’s no reason to limit your options by letting your insecurities get in the way. In fact, if you do feel insecure about it, you might have bigger problems anyway.

Confidence always wins the day when it comes to dating, so if a woman’s height can knock you off your game so easily, eventually that lack of confidence will hurt you in other ways.

This is why working with a coach is so important. Getting your head right when it comes to evaluating your opportunities in the dating world is everything. In my Signature program, I offer 12 private sessions over a period of three months. You’ll learn what really attracts certain types of women to you and how to project the confidence you’ll need to compete — and win — at the game of love. Book a consult session with me today to get started.