If you were to argue that romance is dead, few would disagree.
Dating apps, the speed at which we live our lives, technology, and an ever-shrinking middle class have all had a hand in whittling away our romantic drive.
But just because we’re trending towards romantic awkwardness, doesn’t mean you need to be just another statistic.
When it comes to how to be more romantic with women there are plenty of ways to do so, you just need to use your noggin (or read on).
How To Be More Romantic With Women
Being romantic means something different to everyone.
Your romantic acts should be uniquely personalized for the woman you’re attempting to woo.
Take flowers for one.
Some women love flowers, others are allergic, kill every plant they get, and would much prefer a “fruit basket” full of Milk Duds.
Understand what the person you’re trying to court finds romantic before you don your shining armor.
That being said, regardless of what you do, I’m sure she’ll appreciate the attempt.
Before we get into the specifics, why should you be romantic in the first place? Why make the effort? Many relationships have survived without romance?
Why Even Be Romantic?
Why invest the time, money, and mind-power to being romantic?
There are a million ways to answer this one.
Let’s stick to the most pressing.
Being romantic 1) signals interest and 2) will make her fall for you.
Chances are you’re reading this because you just started dating someone and want her to be into you as much as you’re into her.
Being romantic is the quickest way to build tension and accelerate a bond with your new flame.
This is in part because of reciprocal liking.
Reciprocal liking is the sudden feelings of affecting that we have for someone upon learning that they’re into us. Taking a leap of faith and showing affection without knowing if the other person is into you is terrifying, which is why that first kiss is so difficult.
Once you know someone’s into you, the dance of courtship becomes much easier.
By signaling your interest and laying your cards on the table, you’re ensuring that person you’re into them. So long as you don’t smother them, your romantic gestures will only serve to stoke the fire.
So, what fuel should you use to feed that flame?
Ways To Be More Romantic with Women
You’re about to read a litany of ways to get your romance on.
Thing is, not every gesture will be appreciated.
Not only should these gestures be tailor-made to each woman, but they should only be carried out at the optimal time.
For example, sexy pics can be seen as romantic, but does your Tinder date really want a nudie before you two meet up for cafe?
It’s rhetorical, but considering how many men have done this I might as well answer.
No.
No bathroom nudes before a first date. Hell, no bathroom nudes ever.
The Classic Romantic Gesture
You’re walking home from work on a warm spring evening and happen to walk past a field of these bad boys.
You’re a romantic, so you pluck a few and decide to give them to your new lady-friend on your next date.
This is romantic… unless it isn’t.
Flowers are best given to a woman 1) if you know she’s into flowers and 2) if you’ve already gone on a few dates with her.
Flowers are classic (read; cliche) so sure, many a woman will appreciate them. Even if they’re not into flowers, most likely they’ll appreciate the thought.
Here are some rules when it comes to giving her flowers:
— Make sure you give them to her at home so she doesn’t have to carry them around with her on the date
— Wait until the 3rd date to give flowers
— Be 100% certain she’s not allergic, nor are her pets
To some, flowers can seem like a super romantic gesture.
If you think that’s the case, only bestow her with a mesmerizing bouquet after she’s been deflowered.
If you’re debating sending flowers to her work think twice. Be absolutely certain she’ll appreciate the attention she receives when the entire office turns to her and looks at her assortment of roses and tulips.
It’s important the flowers are delivered when they’ll be most appreciated. Delivering them too soon could turn her off. Make sure your grand romantic gestures come in a sensible sequence.
Pay For Her Nails/Hair/Wax
Yes, it’s 2021, but women (men too actually) still appreciate when a man offers to pay.
But paying for just anything isn’t necessarily romantic.
Paying big money for a piece of gum won’t win you any brownie points.
However, sending her off to a spa day, to get a mani-pedi, or waxed is another thing altogether.
This gesture is seen as romantic because you’re going out of your way to do something nice for her. Not to mention that a byproduct of this is that you ultimately benefit from what you’re paying for.
She’s getting waxed, her hair cut, or her nails done so she can look pretty — in part for you.
This isn’t just romantic, it’s sexy.
Be Chivalrous
Think of all the old-school ways men used to show they cared for women.
Here’s a list:
— Holding the door open
— Walking in-between her and the street
— Accompanying her to her car/subway
— Waiting for her Uber
— Opening the car door for her
— Giving her your jacket
— Texting her to make sure she got home safely
— Helping her get away from awkward encounters
These little things add up.
They show that you care about her well-being. Gestures don’t always have to be grandiose to be considered romantic.
Small things like surprising her with a coffee in the morning or playing music she likes the next time she comes over are small acts of kindness that show just how important she is to you.
It’s these small acts that artfully add fuel to the fire without smothering it.
Spend Intimate Quality Time Together
As odd as this might seem, sometimes the most obvious acts of romance are anything but.
Take a fancy dinner at a Zagat-rated French restaurant.
The lights are dimmed, the music’s humming and the food smells incredible.
At first glance, this might all sound romantic. But how much effort did you really put into this plan? The most romantic thing about it is that you simply decided to spend a bit more money on her. But at the end of the day this is really just another meal, at just another restaurant.
Am I saying that you shouldn’t do this?
Hell no.
Everyone loves eating high-quality food every once in a while.
What I am saying is that being romantic involves effort, forethought, and personalization.
The most romantic thing you can do is spend high-quality time together doing an activity that fosters a bond.
So as opposed to a fancy dinner that takes little effort here are some other options to spend meaningful time together:
— Picnic at the beach
— Stargazing
— Make dinner for her/make dinner together
As you’ll notice both these activities take effort to make happen and are also private.
It’s just easier to be romantic when you’re alone with someone as opposed to being surrounded by a bunch of loud strangers whose conversation keeps dropping in and out of your own.
The aforementioned ideas are best if they take place during or just after a third date. By this juncture, she should be comfortable enough to spend quality alone time with you.
Get Sexy (Virtually)
There are some pandemic trends that will stick around longer after COVID has been vanquished.
One of them is sexting.
Research has found that one in five people took to sending nudes during the pandemic.
Nudes can be a great addition to your foreplay.
Imagine suddenly feeling hot in the middle of work and asking the woman you’re dating for a photo.
If she’s into it, you two just embarked on the beginning of a day-long foreplay adventure.
Signaling sexual interest long before you’re able to physically be with your partner is a sure-fire way to guarantee amazing sex.
That tension will build all day long until finally, you’re alone, can rip off each other’s close and get into it.
Put In The Work
Women are like snowflakes.
From afar they all more or less look the same.
But the closer you get the more you realize that each and every woman is truly unique.
To be the most romantic guy you can be, understand what your date finds romantic.
Then tailor your gestures to her liking.
Not every woman is into chocolates and flowers.
It doesn’t matter what the masses are into, it matters what the woman you’ve been seeing finds romantic.
Think about her likes and dislikes and plot out romantic gestures in advance. If she’s a music buff, find out her favorite band and surprise her with tickets, if she likes horror movies, project the biggest baddest horror movie you can in an abandoned house.
Take the time to consider what she’s into and then plan out a date according to her interests.
Ultimately even if you miss the mark, what’s most important is the attempt.
To learn more ways how to be more romantic, talk to a dating coach via a 1-on-1 Zoom session.